I just got my period (or whatever fun times bleeding this fucking Mirena is giving me this week) at school. In the middle of class. I have blood on my pants like one of my g-d middle schoolers. I f-ing hate being a woman. F this random bleeding. F being so busy getting ready in the morning that I forgot to put on a panty liner. F being a teacher and not being able to just go take care of the situation as soon as I felt something. F having to continue to stand in front of teenagers. I really f-ing hope that they didn't notice.
Oh, and after successfully hiding from DH the fact that I have been having hemorrhoids on and off for 5 months now I left the Preparation H out last night.
Thanks, feel a little better now.
Update: For all of you who offered condolences - I think you deserve to mentally picture me spending the rest of the day holding a lunch tray, book, papers I was copying, etc. in front of my body awkwardly trying to cover it up. Also made sure my podium was strategically placed while I answered questions in the front of the classroom. Luckily I had only one class to go and it was mostly boys, who as @TyrannasaurusLex pointed out are completely clueless. Just got to make it through a faculty meeting and I can go shower and change before eating a ton of guacamole and drinking more than one margarita.
Thanks ladies. As it is cinco de mayo I will be drinking all the margaritas tonight.
Wish I had been quick on my feel to tell DH a little white lie. It was sitting by the toilet so he probably wouldn't have gone with it anyway. He mentioned he noticed it and then I awkwardly sat there and said nothing. He said, "I guess that really doesn't need an explanation" and I think I kind of nodded. Oh the shame.
Re: God f-ing damnit *Funny Update*
Sorry rash start to a Monday.
Or hard liquor.
I think today justifies it.
Sorry for such a shirty start to your week!
BFP #1 5.26.08 DD born 1.4.09
BFP #2 3.11.12 m/c 3.26.12
BFP #3 10.7.12 m/c 10.27.12
BFP #4 2.24.13 ectopic MTX 3.13.13 Right tube removed 3.29.13
BFP #5 5.27.13 DS born 1.22.14
BFP #6 4.14.16
Baby Girl #2 is on her way!