Fear of the wait till first appointment and a miscarriage.

ayachanin · April 2014

This is my first time getting pregnant. I am so super excited! But, there is this fear in me that the baby inside won't be there one day. My appointment is May 28th and I feel like it is so so so far away!!!! I already have tendor breasts, using the restroom constantly, have cramping/pulling sensations in my lower abdomen, and I feel like I am a walking whale. All these symptoms I keep reading are good signs that everything is happening as it should be. So, my question is.... How do I shake this fear? When there are times I feel fine (which has been more rare than feeling the symptoms), I get scared that something happened. I want to enjoy this, but may 28th is so far away!!! And do you take another pregnancy test before going into the appointment to make sure you are still showing a positive?

MusicFanatic · April 2014

I think it's totally normal for us to have fears and/or concerns, that's just natural. But I'd really try and chill a bit

You're gonna be super stressed and constantly nervous if you live in fear like that every single day of your pregnancy.

And btw- you can actually have little to no symptoms and still have a healthy pregnancy. It doesn't mean anything is wrong. Some women just don't have as many symptoms.

Just relax and enjoy the ride!

ayachanin · April 2014

I have been continuing to do everything I have done in the past. Yesterday worked a fundraising table for my husbands rugby teams and had a great time and then went to the Charlotte bobcats NBA playoff game. So, I am definitely relaxing in terms of doing what I normally do. When I called to make the appointment, they said not to take anymore pregnancy tests as it causes more stress. So I haven't. Yet, I saw a post of everyone taking multi tests and didn't know if that was what was helping their fear, or if they were just doing it because they enjoyed the lines. I guess I am looking more for advice on how to make it to the first appointment since it's so far away.

MusicFanatic · April 2014

It's normal to have appointments that aren't immediate, there's nothing much you can do except what you already are. Waiting and keeping yourself busy!

I took a bunch of tests just because I liked to see the lines! But I've stopped since I took like 7 of them, I didn't see a need to keep doing so. But I enjoyed seeing the lines and "I'm pregnant" pop up.

ayachanin · April 2014

Thanks for your help. It's nice to talk to others who are going through similar things! That will be my plan. I will keep on keepin' on. And don't worry I took 6 tests in two days. But now I am done too. It is an amazing feeling to see the two lines

WillCMyInk · April 2014

The thing that has kept me most calm is telling myself that at this point in the pregnancy, even if something were to go wrong, there is nothing that could be done to save the pregnancy. If I were to have a M/C this early on it would be because something was genetically wrong with the baby. No point in stressing over something you can't control.

Oh, and if I don't have symptoms I will be one happy camper!

itsmyangel · April 2014

I'm a nervous one. I had 2 losses prior to DS and we did an IUI this month to get pregnant (we did IVF for ds) I'm one who has been testing every morning and trying to compare them to see if the line is darker etc.....I need to take my own advice and step away from the pee sticks! We should all just live the mantra "Today I am pregnant and I love my baby" (I know I know...easier said than done) But i'll try along with you

CrazyCupcake52 · April 2014

Right now I have been taking a test every morning to help calm my fears and worries. I like being able to see the 2 lines everyday! Luckily my doc does a routine confirmation appointment which I will be going to on Thursday. I think once the results are back from that and they don't have any worries about my beta levels then I will feel comfortable putting the pee sticks down.

And as PP have said there isn't much you can do other than be healthy and be hopeful.

tripletoe · April 2014

Live in the moment and realize today you are pregnant and enjoy it. Stressing over something that may or may not happen won't change whether it happens or not. I know its a lot easier said than done. I share some of your fears but I'm trying to take one day at a time

theadreaming · April 2014

I miscarried last fall/winter in my first trimester and I am pregnant again. So I know how you feel as far as the stress goes. I am closely examining every little thing happening to my body. CrazyCupcake52 is right about it being to early to really do anything if something does happen. So for now I will take comfort in the fact that I had a positive test and there is no bleeding or major pain. My appointment is not until June 6th...counting the days till my first ultrasound!

mammamaggie · April 2014

I feel ya... I really do. I'm another one who worries. I too had a loss before my son, so I know what it's like on both sides of the coin. I'm just praying and trying to stay calm. I think for us that's the best we can do.

kmbeyl · April 2014

My appointment is also on May 28th and I share in your feelings!!! I have been constantly reminding myself to stay relaxed, make healthy choices, and keep a positive attitude. I tested 4 times because I enjoyed seeing the lines and the digital "pregnant" message. Sending positive vibes your way!

Jeane_P · April 2014

I think it's normal this is my second and I am still a little nervous before my appointment on the 29th

ADALLASBRIDE · April 2014

My appt is in may 19th and I worry I'll go to find out the baby stopped growing (hence a miscarriage). The first 12 weeks are filled with worry. If it helps at all, you can buy an at home Doppler that will detect heartbeat around 10 weeks. That's given me assurance in my previous pregnancies plus it's a cool bonding experience for the family.

Mrs_Bennett · April 2014

I think the nerves are normal, but the only thing you really can do is trust that everything is/will be okay. Just keep believing that your body is capable and that your baby is growing. And, most importantly, don't wish this time away--pregnancy is a beautiful and miraculous time, so we should relax and enjoy!!

alibc123 · April 2014

I couldn't agree with you more!!! I am ALL the same feelings/concerns/symptoms as you and I was so relieved to read that I'm not the only one with these fears!

Good luck on these first 12 weeks (and the following 6 months)!

Tmk6k · May 2014

This is exactly how I feel! Thank you for posting and for all of the responses!

lcaulk24 · May 2014

My appt is June 2nd and I took 4 test!' I keep thinking "did I read the tests wrong?" (Even though the two lines and the plus signs were pretty apparent right away!) I share the same fears as you but I just keep waking up and taking it one day at a time! My gut tells my everything is fine, so I have stopped reading about the scary stuff and started reading and thinking about the happy stuff. That makes me feel better!

jennkg3 · May 2014

I think we all have this fear...btw even if you miscarry tests will be positive for awhile cause you still have the hcg in your system.

dragontears507 · May 2014

Even though I've had a couple of strong and doubling betas, I'm still a nervous wreck. After trying for so long, I'm terrified that our baby will be taken away and we'll have to start all over again. I've tried not to think this way, and when I find myself getting down in the dumps or extra scared, I start googling fun baby things. It definitely helps me focus on the fun and the positive and to be just that much more hopeful instead of fearful.

rainbows · May 2014

Im so glad im not the only one with this fear. I was testing every day until I got lines dark enough I felt like it was for real. Doctor's visit yesterday to confirm it. I dont have my first OB appt until May 20th. Until I read on here that uterus cramping/stretching was normal, i was freaking out ALL the time. Now im just trying to calm down. Focus on staying healthy, and planning.

But knowing that all of you have the same worries, makes me feel better that im not alone. And that I have somewhere to come and talk when it gets too be too much.

Twochickshavinachick · May 2014

I can empathise hun,

We were a little slow off the mark because we just couldn't believe it was true and had to wait a couple more days to test again, just to be sure. We've registered at our local health centre with the midwife but we don't actually have a first appointment date yet. Every so often I get the same feeling that baby will just go away before the first appointment. I think it's fairly common and perfectly normal to feel like that. I know it sounds strange but I enjoy my aching breasts and queasy tummy because everyday, it's a reminder that s/he is still there.

'Deep breath and relax' is mantra of the day.

kayham12 · May 2014

My first appointment is June 2nd and I'm terrified to go. Even if baby isn't there, which I pray everyday that it is, I'm so happy to know that it is possible to get pregnant, I suffer from endometriosis and was terrified I would never get a BFP, I cried when I saw it.

it is hard to be optimistic, my SIL miscarried at 11w, so I'm just hoping to make it there, I think I'll relax after that.

LovelyLips · May 2014

Hello ladies. It's nice to know in not alone with my crazy worries. I m/c in Jan so am nervous this time round. I know there is nothing I can do if the worst happens but it's still hard to not want to pee on sticks every day, even that means nothing as you can still register preg for a while after a loss.

So I have decided to try and chill the hell out and go with the flow. It's still early days and the stress is not good for us! So hard though. Nice to know there are others in the same worry boat.

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