Bed sharing question

nicole mackenzie · May 2014

I couldn't find specific guidelines for this.

I lay on my back and LO has been sleeping on my chest at night with her head up by my chin.

She likes to sleep either on her side or belly. Even in the pack n play she rolls herself onto her side.

Is this really dangerous?

khammond3 · May 2014

My daughter sleeps in my belly every night

she is 4 weeks and now starting to transition her to the bassinet

Rrrrrachel · May 2014

You just want to minimize pillows and blankets because they're a suffocation hazard and not be in a situation where baby could get trapped between you and a chair arm or the back of the couch or something. What you're doing sounds like it's probably ok with me. My son sleeps either in the crook if my arm or next to me on the mattress with both of us on our sides facing each other.

nicole mackenzie · May 2014

Ok. I feel better having her close. I'm still in FTM new baby anxiety mode and am terrified she's going to choke on spit up or something while asleep in her pnp.

I keep the blankets to a minimum and never cover her neck or head.

Rrrrrachel · May 2014

Here's some info from dr sears.

https://www.askdrsears.com/topics/health-concerns/sleep-problems/sleep-safety/safe-co-sleeping-habits

amhah09 · May 2014

Yeah baby either sleeps on my chest or in my arm. I just make sure there are no pillows or blankets around her head and I don't let her sleep in the middle of the bed - especially if the kids are in bed with us - unless DH is out of it. I also don't keep the swaddleme on her if she's in bed because I'm scared she'll roll into a weird position. When her arms are out I feel she's more stable in her positioning.

Cassi215 · May 2014

I was sleeping with baby/ babies on me and realized I wasn't getting "good" sleep and it is pretty dangerous. ( I was on the SIDS site doing research) so I ended up putting babies in PNP next to couch where I sleep and have Snuza monitors on them. Best purchase ever!! Xan be found at buy buy baby and they price match amazon if interested!

MissWhis · May 2014

We bed share about half the night. She sleeps on my side of the bed with no pillows or blankets near her head or upper body. I also make sure my clothing is snug and not draping or bunching up near where she lays. I agree with @eme520‌ that keeping her on your chest doesn't sound safe, although for us, putting her on her back only works in theory. I always wake up and she's on her side and we are facing each other - I think that's natural when mom's and babies sleep together.

I am a little concerned, however, that you seem to be sleeping this way because of your anxiety about baby. If it were because that's the only way baby would sleep and you were in survival mode I'd say do what you've gotta go to get some sleep. If baby will sleep in her own space then put her there. Look into getting the Arms Reach cosleeper or practice safer bedsharing at a minimum. At least that's my two cents. Good luck, mama!

Manda+panda · May 2014

DD Wil only fall asleep on her tummy lying on my chest...or while breastfeeding. I nearly always wait for her to fall into a deep sleep and then gently move her to the bed on her back. But, I'm human, I'm a new mom, and sometimes I fall asleep sitting up and nursing, others I fall asleep with her on my chest.

The first week she was home, she slept with us. Then, we transitioned her to her crib...but DH works 12 hour graveyard shifts, and would miss her. He would come home, grab her out of the crib and cuddle her back to sleep. Now, she will not be swaddled and will not sleep in the crib. The moment you put her down and walk away, she screams.

If she will sleep in her own space, maybe give it a try? I second that at the very least make sure you are safely bed sharing.

haziedaze · May 2014

I think bedsharing with baby on their back is probably safer. There's pretty good data behind the back to sleep campaign and while it might be different with baby on your chest, I would try to get them on their back. DH often falls asleep rocking DS2 when he's giving me a break, so we've started setting an alarm for 15-20 mins to wake him up. This is usually enough time for LO to pass through his REM (active) sleep phase and fall into a deeper sleep where he's easier to put down. Maybe you could try that and then transition baby to back sleeping in bed with you or close by in a cosleeper or PNP? Hang in there though, this phase is really about survival and I've said before, I'd count it as a win if everyone's sleeping and you've done all you can to mitigate any possible dangers.

MadBloom · May 2014

Penny is in bed with us for at least a few hours every night. I nurse, burp, change, nurse, burp and that puts her to sleep. Then put her in her playpen next to me. She lasts anywhere from 30 to 90 minutes but never longer and then I nurse again and burp to get her to sleep and repeat. By 5am she is usually on her back beside me for a couple hours. I'm not happy with bed sharing but that's the only way I get a 2 or more hour stretch out of her. I'm actually going to borrow my SILs rock and play tomorrow and set that up next to me and see of she likes that more.

Rrrrrachel · May 2014

The data behind back to sleep is actually not that great. They basically started recommending kids sleep on their back and then saw the incidence of SIDS go down, but other stuff changed in that same time period, like less smoking and more breastfeeding and education about safe sleep spaces.

That being said I do think on their back in your bed is safer than on their stomach on your chest.

Linnea503 · May 2014

DS sleeps on his back or side next to me in bed. In addition to the Sears recommendations, I make sure my long hair is tied back and I dress warmly because I have the covers tucked into the mattress so they only come up to my waist. I have these foam wedge things I found on amazon under the fitted sheet to create a barrier along the edge of the bed--not that he's moving at all yet! He sleeps in 3-4 hour stretches this way vs. random often short sleep stretches in the PNP. Interestingly I sleep much better with him next to me as well, I never seem to sleep more than 45mins if he is elsewhere.

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