How to tell my son he's having another sister not a brother?

jpacheco0927 · April 2014

I need advises I am having my third child, my son is 5 years old he prayed and looked for seeds for me to be pregnant. God blessed me with my third pregnancy he is very exited waiting for a brother and I don't know how to tell him we are having a girl. I believe he wants a boy since he has an older sister and his cousins are girls and he is the only boy when it comes to play time. Please I need advises on how to talk to him. Thank you!

Emerald27 · April 2014

You sound like a religious family. You could explain to your son that God blesses some families with brothers and some with sisters, and some with both, and that God knows best and gets to pick...not Mommy and Daddy.

You can tell him he will be getting a baby sister to take care of, and that God knew he would be the very best big brother for HER.

See how he reacts. He might not be as sad as you expect. Either way, his feelings are totally valid and he shouldn't feel guilty if he's disappointed that he is not getting a brother. You can tell him all the great things there are about little sisters, but also be prepared to give him some space and time to get over being disappointed.

EscoMama · April 2014

I'm the oldest with 3 younger brothers. When my mom was pregnant with the 2nd two, it was the same story. I was 7 and 10 when it happened. When I was 7, I was in the ultrasound room and broke down in tears. Not a tantrum, but I was so sad. When I was 10, it was a little different because EVERYONE thought it would finally be a girl, but I was also old enough to understand better.
Basically, what the poster above me said. Make sure he knows that having a little sister is special and he will be her protector. He might be sad, but he'll move on. I did and I love my brothers.

allrightmeow · April 2014

We are team green and let our DD know that we can't control if baby is a boy or a girl. She'd like a sister but understands and says a brother will be cool too.

rainydayluck · April 2014

It sounds like you don't even know that he has a preference. You want to be careful that you don't project your expectations of you expect him to want on him. Sorry if that is confusing, but basically it comes down to: if you go to him expecting him to be disappointed, he will probably pick up on that and react that way.

cMichelle0423 · April 2014

I think you're over thinking it. I think you should just tell him and show him either way it's something to be excited about. I wouldn't tell him like your breaking bad news. Plus, even if he's unhappy about having another sister, you can help him understand that he can still teach her how to do "boy stuff" and it doesn't have to be all about pink bows and tutus.

JoyfulJuly · April 2014

I would tell him that God picks and picked him the perfect new sister. Don't overthink it.

awc1986 · April 2014

What PPs said.

Also for future ref, my dad has 3 very fiery sisters and he's the most patient and understanding man when it comes to women. Having grown up in a highly strung and hormonal household, nothing phases him.

tbarker14 · April 2014

I agree with what the others said.. if you go to him all excited that he is going to be a big brother ... and that he has a special duty as an older brother to help and protect his younger sibling regardless of their sex. He will be happy and proud to be a big brother regardless..

He might want a brother.. but it does not mean that he can teach his sister how to ride a bike, throw a baseball, or play hockey with!

My Dad was disappointed that he did not get a son only because he wanted the family name to be carried on (a bit old fashioned thinking)... instead he got 3 beautiful girls.. in the end my Dad was so proud to have his daughters playing on the all star baseball teams, hockey, ski teams...before my Dad passed away he was always so proud of his girls being able to stand up for themselves and he did not care about having the family name carried on anymore!

What I am trying to say is that, just because you have a daughter does not mean that she cannot play or do sports with her older brother! This might make him excited to be the one to teach her how to throw a ball around.. some boys think that girls cannot play sports and maybe that is why he would want to have a brother to play with.

(Sorry I just realized that its after 130am... I tend to ramble when I am getting tired..) with that being said just tell him hes going to be an amazing brother regardless! Congratulations to you and your family and hope you have a healthy and great pregancy!

Ceridwen21 · April 2014

I was hoping someone would post that video!

whitney4126 · May 2014

My 5 year old step daughter got really upset when we told her she was having a sister because she wanted a brother. I think she heard the rest of DH's family saying making comments about wanting a boy (which is a whole other topic that annoys me). She's a little more excited now after going to the anatomy scan with me. But I just have to remember she's 5 and really doesn't even have a concept of what it will be like to have a younger sibling, and I know when the new baby gets her, she'll adore her little sister.

rlyttle · May 2014

I tell DS that he will be my favorite boy in the whole world since we are having a DD. I ask him "who's Mommas favorite boy?" Then I ask him who Mommas favorite girl is going to be.