Self weaning already?

Ashesha13 · April 2014

I think LO is self weaning... I know it's early but he just won't nurse. He will latch or ask to nurse but won't stay on for more than seconds so he never gets my letdown.

We've had a really up and down time with nursing and he's done the on off thing before but always eventually got to my letdown. Now it's no more than a few seconds and he's done trying. I'm super sad about it and don't know what to do. I'm trying to up my supply but I think my emotions are just making it worse. He only gets one bottle a day so I'm so confused at to what reason other than flow/nipple confusion as to why he won't nurse.

I don't think I have a good enough pump to EP and I don't think I have a big enough stash to get him to a year. I know formula would be fine, I'm just taking the thought of being completely done very hard.. It's almost depressing. It's one thing for an 18month old or a two year old to wean but 8 months I was not expecting... I feel like I'm doing something wrong and he's rejecting me know....

Sorry guess this is more of a dear diary... It's just been such a roller coaster, breastfeeding, and even though I could see relief in it like I said its also depressing..

shivers7 · April 2014

I've heard that babies can go through this if they are teething and sucking hurts. I dont know if it's the case but maybe?

Sorry you're going through this! A couple of my friends mentioned their babies self weaning around 10 months too.... they would just pop off and play and laugh instead. They started giving homo milk and straight solids, although this wouldn't be my choice at 8 months.

PB102012 · April 2014

I am sorry that you're going through this. We ff so I don't have much advice, only hugs.

Caz1221 · April 2014

Have you tried pumping to get letdown and then offering to him so he doesn't have to work as hard? If he's frustrated at all, maybe that would help. I'm sorry you're dealing with this - I know what you mean about the BFing roller coaster!

MommyKristin88 · April 2014

How long has this been going on? Is he sick? Ear infection? Teething?

MitsB707 · April 2014

Sounds like it could be a nursing strike. I've heard they could happen around this age and many people mistake them for self weaning. Maybe ask the bf board?

carrotcake06 · April 2014

If I never offered the boob to one of mine ever again, I don't think he'd care. Trying to get him to take a bottle is equally as difficult. He's just way more into food. The other one is more amenable to boob. I usually tandem them but it's gotten increasingly difficult.

One thing I found success w is the side-lying position. At least it was successful today. Who knows, I may have to try something different tomorrow to get him to nurse.

I'm thinking of introducing a sippy w BM when I'm at work but I haven't done that yet.

mrs.JL · April 2014

I'm sorry to here about trouble. It probably is just a nursing strike. Also, I have read that early self-weaning can be a sign of low milk supply. Check out Dr. jack Newman's website if you want some info. Good luck working through this.

Ashesha13 · April 2014

Thank you all for the responses.

The on off we've been through periodically and it seemed to coincide with growth spurts possibly but even then he'd stick it out until he got a let down and fully nurse and then after at most a week he was back to regularly nursing.

When its just us he doesn't wait but just happily goes back to doing whatever it was he was doing before. If someone else is around he'll fuss and cry until he gets a bottle. It's been about a couple weeks but just this past week he will not nurse long enough for a let down and then the one time a day he gets a bottle (when I'm at work) he drinks, what for him, is a lot. I'm worried he's not getting enough. The only time he fully nurses is when I dream feed. And I know it has to be effecting my supply.

I've tried pumping for letdown but its usually after first attempting to let him nurse so even with the pump I can't get a letdown or it takes like 5 minutes and when it's just us it's hard to keep him occupied long enough for me to pump at all.

He hasn't nursed at all today

and it hurts my heart. I'm working on pumping and taking fenugreek to hopefully increase my supply.

coraggiosa · April 2014

I agree about asking the BF board. It sounds like it could be a nursing strike, which are common around this age, I believe. I wish I had some advice. Maybe @AmyG could be of help?

SarahinMD · April 2014

Is he getting solids as well? Do you offer breast before or after solids? No, 8 month olds don't self wean--what he seems to be doing is not weaning but showing a bottle preference though I think (since he still take milk, but from bottle and then a lot, as you say).

amaseya · April 2014

My lo went on a nursing strike at four months old and nothing I did got him nursing again. I've been eping since then and I've had to supplement with formula, but I've told myself that at least he's fed, he's happy, and he's growing like a little weed.

Soleil3 · April 2014

Its normal, just keep offering!

https://kellymom.com/bf/normal/babyselfwean/

Soleil3 · April 2014

If hes nursing a lot at night and not much during the day, maybe his eating habits are flip flopped? How much solids os he eating?

MitsB707 · April 2014

Soleil3 said:
If hes nursing a lot at night and not much during the day, maybe his eating habits are flip flopped? How much solids os he eating?

This. DS totally reverse cycled and drinks much more at night than during the day.

carrotcake06 · April 2014

MitsB707 said:

Soleil3 said:
If hes nursing a lot at night and not much during the day, maybe his eating habits are flip flopped? How much solids os he eating?
This. DS totally reverse cycled and drinks much more at night than during the day.

I agree w this as well. The best nursing sessions I get out of them are evening/night/first thing AM. Too much other interesting stuff going on during the day.

Ashesha13 · April 2014

We're doing baby led weaning and I try to get at least two meals a day but that's still rare for us so I know he's not getting over filled with solids and I always nurse before. He wakes often at night and always wants to latch and will stay on a bit longer but still never gets to let down unless i leave him latched after he's fallen asleep and even then it's rare since he's asleep it's such a light suckle.

MitsB707 · April 2014

Ashesha13 said:
We're doing baby led weaning and I try to get at least two meals a day but that's still rare for us so I know he's not getting over filled with solids and I always nurse before. He wakes often at night and always wants to latch and will stay on a bit longer but still never gets to let down unless i leave him latched after he's fallen asleep and even then it's rare since he's asleep it's such a light suckle.

Are you stressing about it while he's nursing? I used to, and it totally didn't help bring it on. I leave DS latched when he falls asleep sometimes, and you'd be surprised how often he would actually bring on another letdown with that light suckling. Maybe try and see what happens? I'm so sorry this is going on as I know it's super stressful.

Ashesha13 · April 2014

@MitsB707‌ I am and I know it doesn't help and really try not to. Once he's half asleep ill get him to latch and he'll stay on and sometimes will get a letdown but not always. I usually try to get him to stay on for at least 10 min just to get the stimulation and if he hasn't got a let down by then i put him down.

Well on a good note while he was tired today, but still awake, I got him to illy nurse no on and off. Tricky part was I had to do it while standing in front of the tv... Probably a fluke but I'm willing to try again.. And think ill but one of the tag blankets to see if that will keep him focused enough to stay on

Starynightsky24 · April 2014

Is he still having good wet diapers? If so I wouldn't worry. He might be getting more than you think. Please talk to a lactation consultant before you decide to wean him... There could be lots of reasons why he is acting that way.

MitsB707 · April 2014

Maybe keep him latched a little longer? DS will fall off on his own, and I'm often surprised at how long it takes to get that letdown. I hope things get better for you and him! Since they're at that age where they get distracted super easily, I've also taken to putting a fuzzy blanket over him and on his cheek when nursing. Something about it relaxes him and he doesn't fuss as much. It's hard and stressful, but keep doing what you're doing, momma! You got this!

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