Surely this isn't proper etiquette NBSR

t loves r · April 2014

While scrolling through my Facebook newsfeed, I came across an engaged friend asking if she should even register for their wedding since she and her husband to be have been on their own for 10 years or so.

While skimming the comments, (most were saying register for somethings you might need or want--new bedding and new kitchen items perhaps) I saw this comment below. Ignoring the website suggestions, is giving a written "the couple is registered here and here" card in the invite rude? If so, I was TACKY with our wedding invites. Whoops...

Edited for formatting

VOR · April 2014

I personally HATE those little cards, for one. While I don't care about registry info being included w/ shower invitations - I hate those little cards falling out. Printed on the invite works just fine.

And - I do agree that mentioning your registry at all in your wedding invitation is a no-no. Your wedding is about you getting married, not about gifts. It just seems gift grabby.

But - what's done is done.

Designermomma · April 2014

I think the work around for that is have a wedding website link printed on the invite and mention registry on the website.

Helenahhandbasket · April 2014

It's not considered proper to ever mention gifts.

While gifts are customery at wedings, they are not gift giving events.

VOR · April 2014

snuff9861 said:

I just received an invite for a wedding that specifically has "no boxed gifts please" on it. Umm wow tacky.

This is one of those things that I'm to the point w/ this whole concept, that if I ever get a wedding invitation that is overly "demanding" of the gifts they want, they won't get ANYTHING from me.

Some stuff I can roll with, but some of this shit is just over the top and rude and gift grabby.

[Deleted User] · April 2014

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RibbitGrl930 · April 2014

msspeedymarie said:

VOR said:

snuff9861 said:

I just received an invite for a wedding that specifically has "no boxed gifts please" on it. Umm wow tacky.

This is one of those things that I'm to the point w/ this whole concept, that if I ever get a wedding invitation that is overly "demanding" of the gifts they want, they won't get ANYTHING from me.
Some stuff I can roll with, but some of this shit is just over the top and rude and gift grabby.

Is "no boxed gifts" code for "we only want money?" Cuz I'd just bring a gift in a bag and be all innocent about it.

Yup, that's pretty much it....and I'd do the exact same thing.

[Deleted User] · April 2014

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Jags8 · April 2014

WTAF to the gift cards meant for mortgages?!

Here in WI, it is very common to include a small card in your wedding invite to say where you're registered. Almost every wedding I've been invited to has had one. However, I chose NOT to do that (so tacky). If a guest asked me if/where we were registered, I told them. I also told my parents and H's parents, in case anyone asked them.

ArmyWife114 · April 2014

SmileyGirl18 said:

We had our website info on the insert with accommodation information/map.

This is exactly what we did as well, our website had links to the registries for those who wanted them, and for those who didn't use computers (most of our grandmothers don't), they asked my parents or ILs. Worked out fine.

As PPs said, proper etiquette says not to mention gifts on the invites at all, word of mouth is the appropriate way to inform those who inquire. But, most weddings we've received invites too had a card with registries or something similar to what we had.

But seriously, who approves of gift cards for mortgages but not a registry insert?!?! Wtf.

Edit: spelling is hard.

t loves r · April 2014

Well, I'll be damned. I am going to have to share this new found info with my mom. I definitely had the registry info with the separate accomadations/directions slip with the wedding invites. And most of the wedding invitations I've gotten do, too.

MMason12 · April 2014

EXP_626 said:

The worst I've seen was an invite I got a few years ago from a friend I hadn't seen or talked to in at least 7 years. It included several registries, one of which was a jeweler. I didn't go to the website, but I assumed it was to pay for the ring or other wedding jewelry. She was also one who set up a FB event for her bridal shower (which I couldn't tell for sure if she was throwing herself) and invited her whole friends list.

She just sounds like a peach! @-)

sschwege · April 2014

MrsFinni said:

snuff9861 said:

I just received an invite for a wedding that specifically has "no boxed gifts please" on it. Umm wow tacky.

I would be putting this bad boy in a gift bag

Why is the chicken sitting on pears?

Is it sad that I think I would actually like to get a gift like this?

Meery82 · April 2014

sschwege said:

MrsFinni said:

snuff9861 said:

I just received an invite for a wedding that specifically has "no boxed gifts please" on it. Umm wow tacky.

I would be putting this bad boy in a gift bag

Why is the chicken sitting on pears?

Is it sad that I think I would actually like to get a gift like this?

Yes. Yes it is.

Meery82 · April 2014

I refused to put registry cards in my wedding invitations. And people bitched that they didn't know where I was registered. WTF. I also almost always receive wedding invitations with the cards in them. I can't remember ever NOT seeing it. Fuck, some of them actually had it printed in the invitation. Ugh. I must live in the land of tacky.

sschwege · April 2014

Meery82 said:

I refused to put registry cards in my wedding invitations. And people bitched that they didn't know where I was registered. WTF. I also almost always receive wedding invitations with the cards in them. I can't remember ever NOT seeing it. Fuck, some of them actually had it printed in the invitation. Ugh. I must live in the land of tacky.

Must be a regional thing, I have only received one invite that had the little cards.

Meery82 · April 2014

sschwege said:

Meery82 said:

I refused to put registry cards in my wedding invitations. And people bitched that they didn't know where I was registered. WTF. I also almost always receive wedding invitations with the cards in them. I can't remember ever NOT seeing it. Fuck, some of them actually had it printed in the invitation. Ugh. I must live in the land of tacky.

Must be a regional thing, I have only received one invite that had the little cards.

Maybe so. I'm in the Midwest.

ArgyleBride · April 2014

I didn't register when I married, and most people were pretty good about it--but I also didn't do Rsvp cards, and that was a PITA. People couldn't figure out how to respond on their own.

sschwege · April 2014

Meery82 said:

sschwege said:

Meery82 said:

I refused to put registry cards in my wedding invitations. And people bitched that they didn't know where I was registered. WTF. I also almost always receive wedding invitations with the cards in them. I can't remember ever NOT seeing it. Fuck, some of them actually had it printed in the invitation. Ugh. I must live in the land of tacky.

Must be a regional thing, I have only received one invite that had the little cards.

Maybe so. I'm in the Midwest.

Interesting, I'm from Chicago, so I guess I'm wrong about the regional thing.

Meery82 · April 2014

sschwege said:

Meery82 said:

sschwege said:

Meery82 said:

I refused to put registry cards in my wedding invitations. And people bitched that they didn't know where I was registered. WTF. I also almost always receive wedding invitations with the cards in them. I can't remember ever NOT seeing it. Fuck, some of them actually had it printed in the invitation. Ugh. I must live in the land of tacky.

Must be a regional thing, I have only received one invite that had the little cards.

Maybe so. I'm in the Midwest.

Interesting, I'm from Chicago, so I guess I'm wrong about the regional thing.

Maybe I just know a bunch of assbags.

Surely this isn't proper etiquette NBSR

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