Naming a girl after a man is an insult to the man?

MandMLeona · April 2014

My husband and his friends seem to think that naming a girl after or in honor of a male is in effect calling that man a girlie-man. Beyond the fact that we're still using girlie as an insult (really I'm not normally a raging feminist.) this really ticked me off. It's an honor to have a boy named after you but an insult to have a girl named after you? Tell me again that you don't wish one of our girls were a boy! Sorry, is it just pregnancy hormones at work here or am I justified in feeling half the population just got disrespected?

I've been holding onto this for several weeks now. Since it wasn't going away, I figured I'd better vent to someone before I took his head off unexpectedly.

12bailey18 · April 2014

I don't have a strong opinion about this but I can tell you that my name is Bailey and the few male Bailey's I have met in my life (or their parents) have not exactly been thrilled to meet a female Bailey. (this was in the 80's and 90's, before it was trendy.) I think it's understandable for men not to have their name associated with being feminine. Maybe I'm missing the mark on your post but that's the first thing I think of. It kind of takes away from the masculinity of a name if you put it on a female.

queenbone · April 2014

No, it's not just you, I'm offended by that as well. I'd tell your Hand his friends to stop being d-bags.

NerdyLucy · April 2014

Pinch him and tell him he's being dumb.

...except maybe you should just imagine pinching him. Don't really do it. I was joking about that part.

MandMLeona · April 2014

This came up because my husband suggested Harlequin with a nickname Quinn. Later he was talking about talking to his friend about how they could tell their friend Quinn that he was naming his child after him and then say it's a girl. It took me a time or two of hearing this story to realize that this was supposed to be some kind of slam to the friend named Quinn. So I clarified that was what he meant. He seemed to think it would be the ultimate insult.

So I asked him if it would be an insult to his father if we used Michaela as our DD's middle name? He said yes and asked if I would want to name a girl after my dad. I said my oldest sister was named in his honor and so was one of my cousins. He's Terry and one is Sherri and the other Theresa nn Terri.

Jags8 · April 2014

I just asked DH. He didn't understand why it would be an insult.

rockopera · April 2014

The ultimate insult? WTF? I would be disturbed that this "man" would be raising girls. He needs a huge attitude change before becoming a father.

Spring78 · April 2014

It is a ginormous insult to women, no ifs, ands, or buts about it. And this is coming from a woman named in honor of her grandfather. His name was Lawrence and I am Laura and I am proud to have been named to honor him (even if Laura isn't traditionally a female version of Lawrence, the intent was always understood). I asked my DH about this just now to get a man's perspective and the highlights of his response were "sexist" and "dumb." Sorry to be so blunt, but this one hit a nerve.

streamtrax41 · April 2014

Not your hormones. He's being a jackass.
I asked my hubs. Here's his reply: "That's completely fucking asinine. And it sounds like it probably came from the type of dad that tells his son not to cry."
I say call him on it.

Alyssa7012 · April 2014

My husband agrees with the others (not yours i mean), he says you should be happy someone felt so strongly to name their child after you

MandMLeona · April 2014

Thanks, ladies. Normally, my DH isn't such a caveman, so I wanted to double check.

Helenahhandbasket · April 2014

Gross.

And you don't have to be a "raging feminist" to disagree with him or think that girlie is a ridiculous insult.

I hope most women are feminists. Actually, I hope most people are feminists.

TweedleDee3 · April 2014

This is really sad to know. I think it'd be an honor irregardless. My husband doesn't see it as an insult and to me it sounds childish as if telling someone the "throw like a girl", it sounds like mean boys on a playground. Hopefully his feelings will mature on this matter.

lilhockeygurlMOM · May 2014

Tell your husband and his friends that they're idiots.

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