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Family is drama

Mysterious_wifeMysterious_wife member
in Babies on the Brain
Every time I talk with one of them, I remember why I never said no to moving.

Today, I called my oldest brother to ask him to be my advance directive in the event H can no longer be.  He asked about Allie. I told him our plans. He was pissed. He called my mom.  Now my mom is pissed.  The last time I checked, I was her parent and could be the one who makes those choices.  

My youngest brother is up to his BS.  My dad and I still barely communicate. 

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Re: Family is drama

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    MrsRustyGriswoldMrsRustyGriswold member
    I'm sure I missed something, but what plans are bothering him?
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    kaydee_2008kaydee_2008 member
    Sorry I hate that. Like it isn't hard enough to plan and talk about anyway, no need for assholeish behavior.
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    Mysterious_wifeMysterious_wife member
    MrsRustyGriswold said:

    I'm sure I missed something, but what plans are bothering him?

    Advanced directive and our wills. She won't go to my family.
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    tbarker14tbarker14 member
    You are right, she is your daughter, you and your H are the only ones that can decide what is best for her.
    Hopefully your family will realize that over time. Until then sorry you are in this situation.
    Might be best to pick someone else besides your brother... sounds like he can't keep your affairs private as they should be.
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    Wine&CupcakesWine&Cupcakes member

    Props to you for doing your advanced directives. I worked at an estate planning law firm prior to nursing school and we always saw the shit hitting the fan when this stuff wasn't done.

    Your family may not like it but they can't do anything about it!

    TTGP December Siggy Challenge: Favorite Holiday Movie:
    ~Santa Claus is Coming to Town~

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    TTC #1: July 2014
    Me: 31  DH: 29
    DX (me): Inborn error of metabolism - protein restriction, metabolic formula & weekly blood tests
    DNA Results (7/1): DH is NOT a carrier for my genetic disorder! 
    7/3: Metabolic clinic gave the green light to TTC - holy crap!
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    MrsRustyGriswoldMrsRustyGriswold member
    Mysterious_wife said:
    I'm sure I missed something, but what plans are bothering him?
    Advanced directive and our wills. She won't go to my family.
    Oh I see what you mean now that I re-read it.  I'm sorry, that stinks.  You know what's best for your kid, and I know you know that.
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    Wine&CupcakesWine&Cupcakes member

    This also made me think about what I would do...we don't have many viable options.

    Both sets of parents are great (ok, my mom is a bit bat-shit cray but ignoring that fact...) but I wouldn't want them to sacrifice the retirement they have worked hard for.

    My brother is an emotional wreck with anger issues, SIL is a free spirit who would rather travel the world than be tied down with babies or, you know, a job, and BIL is young and single.

    Guess me and DH can't die at the same time...so, yea, hopefully that works out.

    Glad you are getting your stuff sorted out!

    TTGP December Siggy Challenge: Favorite Holiday Movie:
    ~Santa Claus is Coming to Town~

    image


    image

    TTC #1: July 2014
    Me: 31  DH: 29
    DX (me): Inborn error of metabolism - protein restriction, metabolic formula & weekly blood tests
    DNA Results (7/1): DH is NOT a carrier for my genetic disorder! 
    7/3: Metabolic clinic gave the green light to TTC - holy crap!
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    Mysterious_wifeMysterious_wife member
    We picked our best friend. He is single and very open to every walk of life. He is more like us. My brother has views we don't believe in. SIL has enough on her plate with niece. My mom is very sickly. My dad has my disabled criminal brother. FIL, well we wouldn't piss on him if he were on fire. MIL has substance abuse problems.
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    MrsRustyGriswoldMrsRustyGriswold member
    You've made a very well thought out choice.  Maybe they'll understand one day and maybe they won't, but too bad.  And most of all, I hope none of it ends up mattering. :)
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    "Oh, the silent majesty of a winter's morn, the clean, cool chill of the holiday air,
    an asshole in his bathrobe, emptying a chemical toilet into my sewer."
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