Blended Families

Another vent about BM (long)

 BM hasn't been doing any of the tranportation for custody exchanges in months because of her "health problems" (normal pregnany). We live about two hours away from BM. She moved without the court's permission but that is another story. The paperwork says DH goes to get the kids from her house and she comes to get them here. We usually meet half way per BM's request. Even before the pregnancy she always had an excuse as to why she could only drive one hour instead of two. Got pissed once that we "made" her drive to our house to get the kids so she filed a child protection order saying we were abusing the kids. It got thrown out of court in less than five minutes. A few months ago when her "condition" got worse she  told (not asked) DH that she would no longer be doing  any driving and that she would send someone else to drop off/pick up the kids. DH reminded her that that isn't what the paperwork says. DH said it would be ok if someone besides him (meaning me) was allowed to do custody exchanges when he couldn't. She threw a hissy fit but finally agreed because DH said that he wouldn't return the kids to anyone but her unless I was allowed to handle custody exchanges when he couldn't. His hours at work are not at all compatable with the pick up and drop off times and I'm a stay at home mom. The agreement was that only her mom, boyfriend, or me could do the exchange without permission from the other one. DH also said that her brother was NEVER  allowed to be there. A few months ago DH had a few voice mail messages from her brother threataning to come to our house and beat DH up. There was another time when BM wasn't at her house when we were suppossed to get the kids that her brother was there. Told us to leave and when we drove away tried to run us off the road. We live in a small town and BM lives in a VERY small town. Law enforcement is done a little differently here than in a big city or suburb. We have reported everything but nothing was done. We filed a restraining order but it was denied. Her brother has also been to jail for assualt charges. I don't feel comfortable around him. A few days ago I was taking the kids back. We usually meet in a corner of a gas station parking lot in another very small town. A few minutes after I got there her mother and her brother pull up next to me. DH had said before that if this ever happend he would just drive off. I wasn't able to get a hold of him so I let the kids out of the car and left. I told Dh later and he told BM. She said she had no idea. DH told her that it is her responsibility to inform whoever does the driving for her of agreemnts like who can be there. DH told her that if it happens again that we would drive off and SHE could come get that kids at our house which is what the paperwork says. Our lawyer said this is fine and wont at all hurt us in court.
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Re: Another vent about BM (long)

  • Sorry about this situation . . . I can't think of any advice except this stupid one.  Get a big dog! Take him with you for the drop off and if those idiots get near you just let the dog at them . . . J/K but, in my twisted head this sounds like the perfect solution! LOL.

    Seriously now, start documenting everything and maybe take a friend with you when dropping off the kids.

  • Well, her moving without the courts permission, and without modifying the court order is sort of important.
    The situation needs to be re-evaluated in court.
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  • imagexmaryrickx:
    Well, her moving without the courts permission, and without modifying the court order is sort of important.
    The situation needs to be re-evaluated in court.

    We are in the process of going back to court. We doument everything.

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