Multiples

Doula with Twins?

DH and I had decided when we got our BFP that we'd like to have a Doula...well really I decided and then DH got on board shortly thereafter:)

Then we found out that we're having twins. I know this makes the chances for a c-section more likely. I think I'd still like a doula. Do any of you have experience with a doula with a twin birth? Should I ask her any specific questions outside of the usual ones? I definitely want to ask what her fee policy is if I end up having to schedule a c-section. I know I should ask if she has any experience with twins.... Anything else?
TTC 3/2012; IUI 2/26/14; EDD 11/23/14; DD born 11/21/14!!!

Re: Doula with Twins?

  • We have a MW, and while we've talked vaguely about a doula, I don't think we'll end up paying for a birth doula.  To be honest, I'm expecting the MW will do the supportive/advocacy stuff with the hospital I might want a doula to help with.

    That said, what I HAVE been considering is a postpartum doula to come a few times a week in the first month or so to help us out with the house, generally be a cheerleader, and help support us in getting the babies on a schedule.  
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    queer couple - 32 (me) & 33 (my love) years old - donor sperm,

    Our IF/TTC journey since Nov 2012.

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    My Love:  (the amazing @Healz413)
    Normal AMH & FSH, AFC ~27, blocked tube dx'd via HSG in 2012.   Hydrosalpinx & ovarian cyst dx'd in May 2013.
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    Partner IVF#1a- December 2013 - H's eggs, my Ute - CANCELLED due to low response
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    We lost our beautiful Twin baby girls on June 18, 2014.  Tavin Sara and Casey Elizabeth were born at 21 weeks gestation and were absolutely beautiful, precious, amazing babies.  We miss our daughters every day and love them with all our hearts.

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  • Manada said:
    We have a MW, and while we've talked vaguely about a doula, I don't think we'll end up paying for a birth doula.  To be honest, I'm expecting the MW will do the supportive/advocacy stuff with the hospital I might want a doula to help with.

    That said, what I HAVE been considering is a postpartum doula to come a few times a week in the first month or so to help us out with the house, generally be a cheerleader, and help support us in getting the babies on a schedule.  
    This is what I recommend! I would skip the birth doula and use the money on a postpartum doula instead.  I think MOM's need to make their peace with having a less-than-ideal birth experience, especially those who are inclined toward natural or midwife-assisted birth. It's just kind of a chaotic scene, with all the people in the room, under the lights and in an OR. I will say, though, that I had a great hospital experience, and everyone on my care team was interested in and supportive of my preferences, to the extent they could be controlled (i.e. delayed cord clamping, immediate skin to skin, etc.) I was not required to get an epidural, either, though I did opt for one. 

    I did have a pp doula who specialized in multiples, and that was so incredibly helpful. She had all kinds of tips and tricks for managing 2. She saved me from going insane more than once in those early days.

    Lastly, if you do decide to hire a birth doula, check with your hospital policies. If you are required to deliver in an OR they may not let more than 1 person in the room for support. 
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    TTC #2 since July 2010
    FSH = 11 (20 on day 10 of CCCT)/ AMH = .98 / AFC=12ish
    5 IUI's with oral meds = all BFN
    March 2012 IVF (MDL Protocol) Started stims 3/3; ER 3/11 (9R, 8M, 7F) ET 3/16 (5dt of 2 blasts graded 3AB and 3BA, 3 frosties(!!) Beta 3/26 = 386; Beta 3/28 = 827; u/s 4/11 says TWINS! Boy/Girl Twins delivered at 36 weeks 6 days

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  • I was only allowed to have my birth partner in the OR, no exceptions.
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  • I'm interested in what others have to say, too. We had a doula with DD's birth and it was awesome. We want to hire her again, but it's costly, so DH is really not sure this time. If it was a singleton again, he'd be totally on board, but with twins it's so up in the air! The doula we want to use does have experience with twins, but we're still not sure.

    @pillowass In regards to a PP doula though, what do they do exactly? You said she helped you manage two, but anything else? My cousin who had twins recommended one as well (or a night nurse), but we have a nanny now so I'm not sure if we need to bother. Ahh so many things to think about.
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  • cadencaden member
    I had a birth doula and a post-partum doula. If you can afford a post-partum doula, do that for sure. That was amazing. I hadn't really considered having a birth doula until I was asked by a doula if she could work with me for free b/c she was in training and knew twin experience would be good for her resume. I agreed and I was glad she was there. I wouldn't pay $500 for it, or whatever they charge, and I definitely wouldn't have a birth doula if that meant giving up having a post-partum doula. If you can find a doula in training you might get a steep discount so that's something to consider. Or maybe a doula will agree to discount the birth if you agree to hire her post-partum.

    What I liked about the birth doula part was that I had never given birth before so I was nervous, and I worried my DH would either be useless or annoy the bejezzus out of me. I wanted someone who knew what was normal and would give me good tips. Because of her I got very brave and decided to forego an epi. That is, until my OB described what would happen if Baby B did not cooperate. That freaked me out so I got an epi about a half hour before I started pushing. I made it almost the whole time on pitocin b/c of the doula. She also recorded my birth experience which I was so grateful for b/c it went by in such a blur, and took pics, helped me BF. (My hospital's LCs were terrible.) She massaged me during labor and got me to try positions that helped with the pain. It was really great. But b/c I got the epi I didn't NEED a doula like I would have for sure needed one had I gone med-free. Oh and my OB would have allowed my doula into the OR. I asked in advance about that. The OB who delivered me let me labor in a L&D suite so it was a non-issue.

    WRT what post-partum doulas do - I had mine come at night once a week until my kids STTN. we bottle fed so she took care of all the night feedings so we could sleep. And that night was fucking amazing. During the night she picked up the house, cleaned the kitchen, did the laundry, cleaned the dishes/bottles, restocked diaper stations... she would have cooked food if she had come during the day and would have helped with the babies more during the day when they were awake.
  • I just interviewed one today and I'm so sold on it. It is expensive though, so we'll have to figure out the budgeting. The way I think of it is that we hired a day-of wedding planner - because DH and I were living in different cities at the time and really wanted someone else as the point person... and this is so much more important than a wedding. In my mind anyway.  As a FTM with twins I'm pretty freaked out and know DH will be so I think its probably a good investment.

    We are moving mid pregnancy and I've found the doulas I'm reaching out to to be such a great source of information about which hospitals do what. The doula I spoke to today suggested a doctor, who specializes in twins and is great at turning babies (her last twin birth, baby b was breech and the doctor was able to do an external version to flip him for a successful vaginal delivery of both babies)...so maybe my dream of a natural birth is possible. She mentioned that usually doulas are allowed in the OR for labor/pushing. They may be kicked out if a c-section is needed, and even then its up to the doctor and anesthesiologist.

    Another great thing is that she is available to be a  source of information in advance (which I'm already benefiting from) and part of the package is that she'll meet with us 2 to 3 times before and once post-partum. She's an LC as well, and will take photos. 

    The other doulas we're meeting with are slightly less expensive, so maybe we'll click with one of them and it'll be an easier decision.
    TTC 3/2012; IUI 2/26/14; EDD 11/23/14; DD born 11/21/14!!!
  • @pillowass In regards to a PP doula though, what do they do exactly? You said she helped you manage two, but anything else? My cousin who had twins recommended one as well (or a night nurse), but we have a nanny now so I'm not sure if we need to bother. Ahh so many things to think about.
    @caden summed it up nicely - the pp doula is just there to help out in whatever way she can. Mine came for 3-4 hours at a time, and I would usually chat with her for a little bit about what the current struggles were, then I would go take a shower and then I would come downstairs and she'd have both babies asleep and some amazing meal/snack cooked out of the stuff in our pantry. She helped me organize the closets and the clothes, washed bottles, or sat with the babies while I went out for a walk. She told me that some moms like the doula to do household stuff (laundry, cooking, etc.) so that they can focus on the babies. It's really up to you. Also, she was a LC - I did not bf but I imagine that would be handy if you were trying to figure out tandem nursing, etc.
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    TTC #2 since July 2010
    FSH = 11 (20 on day 10 of CCCT)/ AMH = .98 / AFC=12ish
    5 IUI's with oral meds = all BFN
    March 2012 IVF (MDL Protocol) Started stims 3/3; ER 3/11 (9R, 8M, 7F) ET 3/16 (5dt of 2 blasts graded 3AB and 3BA, 3 frosties(!!) Beta 3/26 = 386; Beta 3/28 = 827; u/s 4/11 says TWINS! Boy/Girl Twins delivered at 36 weeks 6 days

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  • @pillowass Thanks for the clarification! Kind of like our nanny, but more specialized toward the babies' and my postpartum needs.
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