Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Jazibel
member
Re: Parenting Check-In
Good Morning!
Our weekend was pretty awesome. G is just exploding with new things that he does. It's hilarious to see him putting things together and he's developing a real sense of humor. And the words, oh the words! They are just tumbling out! I love it.
I have a parenting question/challenge, but I'm going to throw it out to the whole board because I think it's a good topic for discussion and hopefully some people who don't already have LO's might have plans that they want to throw out there for this.
QOTD: I'm trying to get through The No Cry Sleep Solution right now. I read a lot of blogs from posts that go around Facebook. Some of them I agree with/learn from. Some I don't really agree with. I actually learn a lot from lurking on the Parenting and Attachment Parenting boards here on TB. I also have a local API egroup that is pretty active and I read everything that is posted there.
Have a great week, everyone! I'm looking forward to reading this week's updates.
Married to my amazing wife 6/12/10
TTC since 6/11
Unmedicated IUI #1 - 6/28/11 - BFN
Unmedicated IUI #2 - 7/25/11 - BFN
Robotic Myomectomy (Fibroid Surgery) - 11/15/11
Unmedicated IUI #3 - 4/24/12 - BFN
Progesterone Supported Leuteal Phase IUI #4 - 6/21/12 - BFP!!
Baby Boy G Born 3/24/13
On to #2, are we crazy?
IUI #1 - 11/28/14 - BFP! Beta #1 (11DPO) 34, Beta #2 (13DPO) 101, Beta #3 (20DPO) 3043
Ultrasound at 6w4d shows a single, fluttering heartbeat. Say hello to Sticky Ricki!
Baby Oliver born 11/27/13
TTC stats with donor sperm...
IUI #1 with trigger, 1/4/13 - BFN
IUI #2 with trigger, 2/1/13 BFN
IUI #3 with tigger, 2/28/12 BFP EDD 11/21/13
Baby Oliver born 11/27/13
TTC stats with donor sperm...
IUI #1 with trigger, 1/4/13 - BFN
IUI #2 with trigger, 2/1/13 BFN
IUI #3 with tigger, 2/28/12 BFP EDD 11/21/13
I don't really read parenting stuff anymore. I used to read Kellymom when I was BFing and I read a ton of sleep books when the kids were babies and not sleeping (we ended up doing this sleeplady.com and it worked for us.) I was on babycenter and some other LGBT parenting blogs. I've picked up some books about the emotional intelligence of boys, but haven't bought/downloaded them. I feel like the older they get, the more we trust our instincts and feel like we know what is best for the kids.....now ask me that when they are teenagers.
Married to my amazing wife 6/12/10
TTC since 6/11
Unmedicated IUI #1 - 6/28/11 - BFN
Unmedicated IUI #2 - 7/25/11 - BFN
Robotic Myomectomy (Fibroid Surgery) - 11/15/11
Unmedicated IUI #3 - 4/24/12 - BFN
Progesterone Supported Leuteal Phase IUI #4 - 6/21/12 - BFP!!
Baby Boy G Born 3/24/13
On to #2, are we crazy?
IUI #1 - 11/28/14 - BFP! Beta #1 (11DPO) 34, Beta #2 (13DPO) 101, Beta #3 (20DPO) 3043
Ultrasound at 6w4d shows a single, fluttering heartbeat. Say hello to Sticky Ricki!
Kaden is doing great learning new words and mini-sentences. He loves communicating, we'll read books together (as in AT LEAST 30 a day) and he'll just repeat the words I point out. It's really fun to participate in this type of active learning. Physically he's getting more confident too - the other day at the park he climbed a 6-7ft ladder (plastic with small oddly spaced squares). I had to call EV over so I could climb up after him. Let me say the almost 2 year old was a lot more nimble then his 9.5 month pregnant mom! ;-) It's scary but exciting to see him be daring, and trust his body more.
On the challenging side he just started screaming last night and today when he wants something. Its a loud, screechy - terrible - terrible scream... Ugh!! EV and I just stare at each other and shrug. We're trying to ask him to communicate and say "please" to let us know what he wants. This evening's episode the screaming was to ask "to get out of the bath". Totally reasonable request - just not in screaming tones. Gotta love toddlerhood.
QOTD: I used Google search A LOT for any questions that come up. Then I try to pick the most reasonable site/ forum/ etc. as a reference.
Aside from the Bump, I joined a "Raising Natural Kids" page on Facebook, and a few other Facebook pages that mostly focus on crafts, etc. I like Mothering, and Green Child websites, I think both are associated with magazines that I don't subscribe too. I read more about infants than I have about toddlers. I have the What to Expect: Toddler edition. It's pretty formulaic but has helpful insights. I love Pinterest, but that too for craft and game ideas.
We had (well, my partner) overheard a mother telling her son that somewhere, so we began to do/use the same idea ourselves.
As for us .. it has been a roller coaster of a weekend.... communication is still a "hit and miss" for some odd reason -- I'm not sure why, but my partner, whom is home majority of the time, feels offended when our lo doesn't greet her when we come home. He just walks past her into the other rooms. Sigh! (There are times when he gets super excited to see her when we get home. So this "event" is making a huge stink in our home right now.)
A plus for me? Our lo signs more when he's sick! He doesn't like to talk when he doesn't feel well. I learned that on Sunday. Just amazed me.....