Who's got a clingy toddler?

bumpuser9353653 · April 2014

DD will be 2 in early June. Not sure if she senses that something is about to change (do toddlers have spidey-senses?) or what but she's been super clingy to me lately.

She has fits if DH tries to get her a snack from the pantry instead of me and literally pried my mom's hands off the shopping cart because she wanted me to push it. And when I left for lunch with my mom on Saturday, she cried like I was abandoning her even though she was outside in the nice weather with DH. And of course, I'm the only one allowed to do the bedtime routine.

This is so atypical of her, that it's driving me crazy. I'm really hoping this is just another phase that will fade once baby is here and we've all adjusted.

So tell me I'm not alone and someone else out there has a nutty toddler too!

ksyknelvr73 · April 2014

We are dealing with this, maybe not as drastic but my son insists he wants mommy to do everything. He has also been asking me to hold him constantly which he hasn't done in months. I definitely think he knows it is getting closer....he has also been asking to read the "baby book" every single night (we have a couple books about him becoming a big brother, etc).

kalette · April 2014

DD does this too, but I think its more of a phase than anything related to the baby. She only seems excited when we talk about baby brother.

toadstool · April 2014

This is my DD as well. Her separation anxiety from me is through the roof. She does everything you are describing. What has really started to alarm me is that she has started having bad dreams about me leaving as well. She wakes up crying or will start crying in her sleep and she will say things about me coming back. I think it is a phase and I do think it is related to her new sibling coming soon.

IBackBevo · April 2014

My DS (19.5 months) is like this, but with my husband. I think it is a phase. I feel like, if anything, with the baby coming he is separating himself from me and it makes me a little sad.

Funnygirl34 · April 2014

My son is only 13.5 months and I swear he knows something's up. He has been veryyyy clingy over the past week and he's jealous of me with other babies. It'll make for an interesting first few weeks once his brother arrives, but I'm confident we'll all get in to a groove.

kb2bkk · April 2014

Clingy toddler club here. She has always chosen DH to do things like reading bed time stories, now it's Mama or bust. We just started telling her that Mommy and Daddy need to take turns (which she understands) in an attempt to make it all not Mommy, Mommy, Mommy.

She has also in the last week started with "baby talk". I have no idea where she picked it up, but she only does it with DH and I. I have just started telling her that until she uses her real words I don't know what she wants.

MissLadyTay · April 2014

My son is three and is doing the clingy thing hardcore with me. Won't let MH do bath or bed or songs or read to him. I have been giving him lots of extra love but also occasionally removing myself and leaving the two of them alone to do things together.

bumpuser9353653 · April 2014

Glad my little goober isn't the only one acting off. Stinks that we all have to go through it though.

@kb2bkk‌ - that's a good idea to explain it as mommy and daddy "taking turns". We might have to try that!

MrsT2008 · April 2014

Sort of (DD is almost 29 months). Really only with bedtime but I doubt it's related to baby since she's been like that for a while. She literally has meltdowns if I even mention daddy putting her to bed. I blame it on the fact that he isn't even home for bedtime 99% of the time and she's big on routine. I have to basically not be home (or pretend to be leaving) in order for her to let anyone else do bedtime.

frasey · April 2014

I didn't think my DD was going to be too bad w this until the other day. I was picking her up at daycare, and they have a 4 month old baby there. DD had just woken up so needed a diaper change before we went home. The daycare lady asked if I would mind holding the baby while she changed the diaper. Hold baby or change diaper? That was a no-brainer, so I was holding the baby and talking to the lady and DD. Well DD was NOT pleased about me holding the baby I can tell you that!!! Hopefully things will be different around our baby, but I guess we will see about that.

eghulse · April 2014

DS hasn't been clingy, per se, but he has definitely been more willing to cuddle while we're home hanging out during the day. Not sure where it came from, either.

jjones59 · April 2014

I certainly have an ultra clingy toddler, she loves to spend time with mommy and mommy only. I'm not sure how to deal with it other than spend time with her and play with her, we talk to her a lot about her brother coming and hopefully soon it will seem more real to her when he gets here.

jenb_99 · April 2014

DS (almost 2.5) has been super clingy the past few days. He's suddenly incapable of independent play and now must be touching me at all times. He's also started crying in the middle of naptime for seemingly no reason and just lies there waiting for me to go get him instead of getting up and coming into the living room like he usually does.

I really don't see how it could have anything to do with the baby; he's just too little to understand that on any level. I think it's just a phase.

jessicastanley · April 2014

Oh yes. Yes I do have a clingy toddler. It is driving me bonkers. I can't even take a pee with the door open at 4 in the morning without my 3 1/2 yo DD coming in and ask what I'm doing. It's horrific.

Mittens14 · April 2014

DS will be 4 this summer and has always been more attached to me than anyone else, it has gotten worse the past two months. And since he is older and knows a little bit more about what is happening it's getting worse as he tells me things like "mommy, I don't want you to go to the hospital, I'll miss you", "who's going to put me to bed?", "who's going to feed me dinner?" etc. it breaks my heart

Hang in there.

kb2bkk · April 2014

Mittens14 said:

DS will be 4 this summer and has always been more attached to me than anyone else, it has gotten worse the past two months. And since he is older and knows a little bit more about what is happening it's getting worse as he tells me things like "mommy, I don't want you to go to the hospital, I'll miss you", "who's going to put me to bed?", "who's going to feed me dinner?" etc. it breaks my heart Hang in there.

Do you have any close relatives your DS could stay with for a random night before you deliver. We have sent DD to my ILs twice now in the last month and talked about what a special treat it was that she got to stay there. We plan on doing the same with my parents, so she is comfortable at both places, and staying away doesn't equal major change it equals something fun and exciting.

kb2bkk · April 2014

jenb_99 said:

DS (almost 2.5) has been super clingy the past few days. He's suddenly incapable of independent play and now must be touching me at all times. He's also started crying in the middle of naptime for seemingly no reason and just lies there waiting for me to go get him instead of getting up and coming into the living room like he usually does.

I really don't see how it could have anything to do with the baby; he's just too little to understand that on any level. I think it's just a phase.

While I don't think my 2.5 year old total "gets" all the implications of a new baby, I find it hard to believe that she doesn't understand it on any level. Whether or not your DS is vocalizing it, I'm going to guess he gets it more than he is letting on, and if he isn't it may be worth taking some time to talk to him about it. He's about to go through some major changes so it may be worth trying to explain some of it to him.

DD is in and out of liking the fact that I am pregnant. She was not one to often talk about it. Then one day we were at a family gathering and she was dancing around, stopped mid tracks, and announced to the entire family how the new baby is in Mommy's belly and she is so sad because she can't be in there anymore. It allowed us to talk about how much I love having her not in my belly so we can do fun things together, etc., etc..

toadstool · April 2014

kb2bkk said:

jenb_99 said:

DS (almost 2.5) has been super clingy the past few days. He's suddenly incapable of independent play and now must be touching me at all times. He's also started crying in the middle of naptime for seemingly no reason and just lies there waiting for me to go get him instead of getting up and coming into the living room like he usually does.

I really don't see how it could have anything to do with the baby; he's just too little to understand that on any level. I think it's just a phase.

While I don't think my 2.5 year old total "gets" all the implications of a new baby, I find it hard to believe that she doesn't understand it on any level. Whether or not your DS is vocalizing it, I'm going to guess he gets it more than he is letting on, and if he isn't it may be worth taking some time to talk to him about it. He's about to go through some major changes so it may be worth trying to explain some of it to him.

DD is in and out of liking the fact that I am pregnant. She was not one to often talk about it. Then one day we were at a family gathering and she was dancing around, stopped mid tracks, and announced to the entire family how the new baby is in Mommy's belly and she is so sad because she can't be in there anymore. It allowed us to talk about how much I love having her not in my belly so we can do fun things together, etc., etc..

I agree that most 2.5 year olds would understand on some level. Little ones are pretty good at picking up on lots of things, especially something so close to home.

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