Toddler suddenly screaming at nap/bedtime?

randcbaby · April 2014

My 17 month old has never been a "perfect" sleeper--he's only recently started to STTN, somewhat inconsistently--but his strong suit always was falling asleep. Unless he was sick, since he was maybe 6 months old we have usually been able to put him down for naps/bedtime awake (various degrees of drowsy) and leave the room for him to fall asleep on his own with barely a peep (definitely no crying). All of a sudden, we are totally unable to do this. As soon as we put him in his crib, he starts to scream. He is immediately so hysterical that he's sputtering/choking and seems on the verge of making himself throw up. We aren't comfortable with CIO in general, but I don't think it would be helpful here anyway--he is frantic, and his crying is so extreme I worry about his safety. We have had success with sitting in the chair in his room and waiting for him to fall asleep (he usually will calm down pretty quickly if we tell him we'll sit and wait), and sometimes we end up rocking him to sleep. Once he is asleep, he usually will then sleep through the night.

This happened basically overnight. One day he was going down as usual, without a fuss, and the next he was hysterical. We did recently take a very short two-night vacation where his sleep suffered (as it always does when we are away from home), but he usually bounces right back from trips. I was trying to wean him, too (he only nurses before nap/bed if I put him down), and my husband had been putting him to bed for a few weeks with no problem, but I've decided to pause that process while he's having this sleep trouble and go back to nursing if he demands it.

Anyone experience something similar? It feels like it could be a quick-onset separation anxiety (if it can happen that suddenly), or a sleep regression--except don't sleep regressions usually involve increased night wakings? So far, he is still STTN. Our strategy for now is just to help him get to sleep with as little of the hysterical crying as possible, in hopes that he will just work it out himself and eventually we'll go back to "normal." Every time, we do try to put him down like we used to and leave the room, just to see if it will work--and I'm hoping that one day it will, as suddenly as it stopped working?

pb_bride · April 2014

You didn't say how long your DS has been doing the screaming thing. My son does that occasionally - 99% of the time it is due to heightened separation anxiety caused by illness or teething. Luckily, he only does it for a day or two, and then he goes back to his normal self. We have done sleep training way back when, but when DS gets in this state, any of the sleep training method doesn't work. He stops when I go back to his room but starts crying the second I leave. This can go on for an hour or longer so I stop doing that. Basically, when he gets one of these episodes, the only thing that works is for me to stay in his room until he's asleep (or close to asleep). Sometimes his separation anxiety is so bad that I have to let him hold my hand thru the crib slats, then I gently pry my hand away when he's asleep.

DS does a lot better if DH is the one who puts him down, however.

Anyway, I just want to say that hopefully this is just a phase and your DS will get back to his normal soon.

ashiscute · April 2014

Two thoughts. If it's been going on just a few days my first thought would be ear infection. Most of the time with DS I didn't know he had an ear infection until I put him down for bed and he went crazy.

The other option is it's just the 18 mo sleep regression. DD went through it right around then and it was tough. But basically it was just a week or so of extra snuggles and drama at bedtime and she worked her way through it. In about 2 weeks she was back to normal. We did not let her CIO but just gave her extra love. Good luck!

landrews · April 2014

Sounds like this could be sleep regression. The same exact thing happened for us, thankfully it was only at nap time. It lasted about 1 month. Strangely, it only affected naps at home (at daycare 4 days a week, naps didn't suffer).

We normally do CIO, but like you said, this approach isn't productive in this situation. I am against sleep "crutches", but did resort to using them in order to get thru the regression. What worked for us - sit with her in our lap front of the tv until she feel asleep (took 5-10 min), or schedule a morning outing and time it so that the drive home she would fall asleep and we would transfer her to the crib.

And yes, this behavior stopped as suddenly as when it began. Stay strong and good luck!

meglette417 · April 2014

If rocking him to sleep works for you and he sleep through the night then I would just do that. We did that with DS and I asked the pedi if it was good, she said the only issue would be him getting himself back to sleep if he woke in the middle of the night. He does sometimes and we do CIO but he usually is back asleep within 5 min so it works for us. Rocking now doesn't work b/c he is too big and we have had the same routine for months, he always cries before going to bed it is just him doesn't last long but that is his personality he is always moving and hate missing anything

krearden · April 2014

I'm so glad you asked this question, our LO is going through the same thing right now. Our son is 12.5 months & has always STTN & gone to sleep pretty quickly without a problem. It's only been in the last week that he's started with the same behavior you mention. We were just at the Dr. on Monday for a checkup & no ear infections or any illnesses to speak of, haven't traveled recently, or had any other changes in his schedule, so I have no clue what it could be. I'm so glad to hear others say that it's just a phase and it will disappear as quickly as it started. I'll keep an eye on this post to see if there are any more recommendations mentioned. Thanks again!

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