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Finalization

CarolinaGirl2014CarolinaGirl2014 member
in Adoption
Today, my daughter's adoption was finalized. I'm feeling so many mixed emotions- happy that she is officially secured there forever, but it brings up the grief over losing her forever all over again. I also don't know if I like the fact that it was on Good Friday. I'm still confident in my decision but I of course hurt over not being her Mom anymore.

Also, A's mom asked me to write a letter to EMoms for their portfolio. I'm thrilled to do so because I adore them, want A to have a sibling, and know that if a woman has to go through this they are a great couple to do it with. Has anyone has a bmom do this before and have any idea what it would look like?
Birthmom to A, 1/8- the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.

A Journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. -Lao-Tzu

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Re: Finalization

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  • Dr.LorettaDr.Loretta member
    Hugs to you. I'm sure it was a tough day.
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
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  • maryoosamaryoosa member
    I'm sorry that you are hurting. I know Good Friday feels like a rough day for things to happen- but know that her aparents likely had no say in the date of finalization.
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
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  • ejrobbiejrobbi member
    edited April 2014
    Hugs

    edited 
    Siggy Warning... loss mentioned

    Married since March 2008 -- Me- 31    DH - 30  Trying to grow our family since 2009... Diagnosed Unexplained Infertility 

    Started seeing RE Aug 2013

    Cycle #1  – IUI #1  10.31.13 - BFN

    Cycle #2 - IUI #2 cancelled – FAIL

    Cycle #3 - IUI #2 12.27.13  BFN

    Cycle #4 -  IUI #3 1.24.14  BFN

    Cycle #5 - IVF #1 with ICSI(2 3bb blasts) 3.19.14, no frosties.. BFN


    Surprise BFP on 6.10.14 ... Miscarried 7.7.14 


    Walked away from Fertility Treatments and began to look into our Foster/Adopt License in April 2014.


    Our Journey Blog...  http://salatafamilyest2008.blogspot.com/


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  • CaptainSeriousCaptainSerious member
    How difficult that must have been for you. I'm sorry it hurts so much. If it helps, think of it happening on Good Friday as the really painful, sacrificial thing that had to happen before she could have the life you chose for her? I don't know if that helps at all, but I thought the mirrored symbolism might?

    I wish there was a way to make this easier for you.
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  • CarolinaGirl2014CarolinaGirl2014 member
    @captainserious that does help, actually. I kept reminding myself how happy she is with them and how happy they are finally being parents. And reminding myself that God doesn't make any mistakes so she was created for them all along, but I'm still a special person in her life.

    There are way more good days than bad days as a birthmom and her family helps a lot in that.
    Birthmom to A, 1/8- the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.

    A Journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. -Lao-Tzu

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  • CaptainSeriousCaptainSerious member
    Wishing you all the best and daily peace.
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  • lorifromwilorifromwi member
    It sounds like you and your daughter have found a wonderful couple to be part of your family.  And while they may be raising her day to day, you are all still family and will have a bond as strong as any other.  It sounds like they are understanding and grateful for the choice you made to give her "more" and by doing that you have given her the world.  Wishing you serenity through this milestone...it is one of the tougher ones.  There will be better ones to come!

     

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  • annaliselannalisel member
    Wishing you peace during this transition.

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