Parenting

Handling Rude Comments

I am a FTM to an 8 month old and recently comments others have been making about my son have been making me hurt and angry. I am looking for advice on how to handle this. He was 7 lbs 8 oz when he was born. At his next check up he was in the 95th percentile for weight and has now dropped down to the 67th percentile. He is healthy and his doctor has no problem with his weight. Since he was a few months old I have had people make rude comments calling him "fat", "chubby", "huge", "giant" and other terms that could be hurtful to him. I don't think they mean to be offensive but as his mother it really makes me angry. They just don't think before they say things. I don't want him growing up with low self esteem or thinking he is "fat". He is none of those things, he is just a baby. I am looking for advice on what to say to these commenters without being rude myself (even though I'd love to tell them to F. Off sometimes). Any help would be appreciated!

Re: Handling Rude Comments

  • He is just a baby. I don't think it is a big deal.

    Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers

     
    Lilypie Second Birthday tickers
  • Loading the player...
  • I don't think they are trying to intentionally be offensive but it's still slightly rude. I wouldn't walk up to you or another adult on the street and say "Oh my.... you're quite chubby" and expect you to be happy about it. I don't think it's ok to call children terms like that either.
  • EVA116 said:

    It would not be okay for someone to go up to a 5 year old and say that.

    But, calling a baby chubby is not necessarily a negative comment. People love chubby babies. I think you are being overly sensitive. And I say this as someone that gave birth to a 10lb 9oz baby girl and heard every comment about large babies under the sun, including advice that my then two month old should've been on a diet.

    That shit is not okay.

    I kind of laughed it off and walked away. The woman that said it was well into her 80s, what was I gonna do?

    Image and video hosting by TinyPic

  • Thank you to those who offered the helpful advice. I guess it's just the overprotective mommy in me. I was just concerned it might continue as he gets older.
  • I loved my little chunk and all her rolls. The only time I felt someone was over the line was when they told me she must be a boy because of how solid she was. When I informed them she was a girl they said well she is still going to make quite the linebacker. I just rolled my eyes and walked away.
    image

    Our Little Raspberry Born 3/27/12
  • Thank you to those who offered the helpful advice. I guess it's just the overprotective mommy in me. I was just concerned it might continue as he gets older.

    He probably will lose some chub as he gets more mobile. If it does continue when he's 3-4+ I would start with some smart ass comments back.

    Harry Styles = Life Ruiner

    image

    There’s a lightning in your eyes I can't deny
    Then there’s me inside a sinking boat running out of time
    Without you I'll never make it out alive
    But I know, yes, I know we’ll be alright
    -----------------------------------------------------------------------
    J. 1.14.13 my reason for breathing 
  • I understand that you want to protect your child from being hurt, but he is only 8 months old, and won't remember anything. It's nothing that you are doing wrong, so please don't take other peoples comments about your baby seriously. They will say something about chubby babies, and they will say something about skinny babies. You can't win. ,My DD was off the charts for her weight, and only in the 20% for her height. People called her chubby. DS is off the charts for height, but only in the 3% for weight. People tell us that we need to feed him, he looks like skeletor.

    Next time people say something, tell them that the pedi who went to medical school isn't worried, and that the baby is perfectly healthy.

    image

    AlternaTickers - Cool, free Web tickersAlternaTickers - Cool, free Web tickers

     image

    Created by MyFitnessPal - Free Calorie Counter

    "><a href="http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker"><img border="0" src="http://tickers.myfitnesspal.com/ticker/show/825/1820/8251820.png" /></a><p style="text-align:center;width:420px;"><small>Created by MyFitnessPal - Free <a href="http://www.myfitnesspal.com">Calorie Counter</a></small></p>
  • Thank you to those who offered the helpful advice. I guess it's just the overprotective mommy in me. I was just concerned it might continue as he gets older.
    He will probably become more lean once he starts walking/running. My chuck is now fairly petite.
    This. Once my DD started walking she evened out and is now 50% for weight. Don't worry about what may or may not happen.

    Image and video hosting by TinyPic

  • MaebbMaebb member
    I agree with PPs that it's not going to hurt your baby's feelings.

    If the comments bother you, I agree with @SunnyDays26‌'s approach. Just smile and say, "I love his sweet cheeks" or something else that puts a positive spin on what the people are saying. I also don't think they're being rude, but if you think they are, just turn the comments into something good.

    "He's so fat." Smile and say, "He loves to eat, and the doctor says he's doing great!"

    "Look it his round little belly." Smile and say, "I love that little belly!"

    That way if you're worried about your son taking the messages in a bad way and getting hurt feelings, he's hearing you reaffirm that he's great.
  • Thanks for making me feel better. I was just annoyed and looking for support. It's nice to vent sometimes.

  • MrsBadKat said:
    This is hilarious.

    Are you laughing at my chubby baby!!!

    Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers

     
    Lilypie Second Birthday tickers
  • I think people naturally stop calling babies chubby or the like once they get older. My chubby toddler has been off the charts since she was 2 months old and has always been called chubby, big and what have you. But now that she's 2.5 those comments have decreased. People just know when to stop.
  • My DD was a chub. @notsharknado and I used to have a chub-off between our girls.  DD is now pretty lean but she still has a mid thigh crease.

    This was 7ish months leg chub.
    image



    Soph is thinning out too but she still has some turkey legs :)
  • I effing love chubby babies!  

    image

    image
  • I can't help but notice my fat baby is not getting as much love titting as the other fat babies pictured here. Rood!
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    image

     
  • Your chunk is adorable too @NeneCakies !!!
    :)
    image
  • The user and all related content has been deleted.
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"