Ups and downs

MickeyM04 · April 2014

Sigh.

So we had our 36 week ultrasound today which was great. Fluid looks good, placenta looks gorgeous, baby is measuring completely normal at an estimated 5 pounds, 1 oz (small end of normal, but normal) and looking adorable. Then I get my internal exam and my OB sort of chuckles and goes, "Man, you've got nothing going on in there!" Cervix is closed, baby is high. I am only 36 weeks so I wasn't expecting to be like 3cm or anything but at my 36 week appt with DS I was 1 cm and felt like my body was starting to do what it was supposed to...and then he got here a week later. I feel like I may as well have heard, "This baby is never going to come." Which, granted, I am cool with her staying in there for a good long while yet, especially because I have a fear of her arriving on DS's birthday (their due dates are one day apart)...but just to basically hear that my body isn't doing what it's supposed to be doing makes me feel like a big fat failure or something. I know I'm a hormonal mess these days so I am taking my reaction with a grain of salt but still. I walked out of the appointment with DH all, "GREAT. Now I'm giong to have to be INDUCED." Which of course he reminded me was a completely illogical reaction, and then I started bawling. It's gonna be a long 4+ weeks if I can't get my shit together.

MickeyM04 · April 2014

Thanks @PugLife5689, that is so sweet of you to say

Even this morning I was like remember, it doesn't matter what she says about how dilated you are. (I know someone who was 3 cm at 38 weeks and went late...I know someone who was 1cm at her 40 week appt and had her baby 2 days later...etc.) But then to hear it is totally different. Plus last time at my 36 week I was 1 cm and DS was here the following week--I never even had a 37 week appointment! So this is all new to me.

ksyknelvr73 · April 2014

I know you are just having a hormonal moment right now, and you are entitled to that. I was checked at 36 weeks with DS1 and I was already 1 cm and 50% effaced and I never went into labor on my own, I was induced. So hey, progress for some of us doesn't mean anything either! And if you do have to be induced, maybe it won't be as bad as you are imagining. I had a wonderful labor and delivery with DS so if you need any encouragement, I gotcha

Hang tight, 4 weeks can change PLENTY of things!

MickeyM04 · April 2014

@theresat858 - no no no, it's not that I want her to come now or anything, it's just that I feel like my body isn't doing what it's supposed to be doing. I have a friend who was 0cm at 36, 37, 38, and 39 weeks, 1 cm at 40, and induced at 41 weeks due to low fluid and her body showing NO sign of going into labor on its own, so it's just like I see it as this irrational sign that my body doesn't know it's supposed to start preparing for labor. I mean with DS I was 1 cm by now so it's like my body knew what it was doing last time, right? And I had this great L&D and now I'm just like well this isn't how it's supposed to be!

Also @PugLife5869, I didn't know you changed your s/n! Welcome? Re-welcome? LOL. I haven't been terribly active on either board lately, I kind of suck at life right now with baby preparations, DS's second birthday coming up, and whatnot. I am going to try to post more now because Lord knows I've got plenty to say!

Junebug060609 · April 2014

Your body IS doing what it's supposed to and every pg is different. Your friends story won't necessarily be your own.

I get wanting a sign things are headed down the path you hope for for delivery, but you have time still to get there.

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