Working moms who are now SAHM's.

jackdaniels13 · April 2014

How did you come to this decision and what are some changes you made in order to SAH? I really don't see this being an option for me but I am researching EVERY avenue I can possibly think of. Would love to hear from some BTDT ladies who have been in my position and how you made it work. TIA

elm005 · April 2014

We just decided that the cost of childcare would offset any money I made when we figured in gas, tolls, and meals out. We are fortunate that DH has a good job so we didn't really cut corners. I try to shop sales, garage sales, and coupon to help.

Our big thing was health care. DH is self employed so I carried that. We were both uninsurable due to pre-existing conditions so Obamacare made it possible for us to buy insurance again. If something happens to that, then we would have to look into either me going back, or getting our company set up with a group plan. As it is, we pay around 800 a month for insurance. It would double if we lost Obamacare.

JamieWM · April 2014

I was suppose to return Dec 9th and November came and I was having panic attacks about leaving LO. I didn't think id be as crazy over him as I was and am. I would cry and cry....when DH and I discussed child care and healthcare...I'd literally be working for both and we still would be screwed. 1 month out, we got ourselves onto DHs insurance and I gave my notice. Do we struggle? Absolutely. I have given up a lot but am the happiest I've EVER been. DH is a police officer so as details and overtimes pick up after training is done, life will get easier. I was very into my career....but wouldn't change a thing.

My friend who is also a SAHM buys things on eBay or whenever and turns around and sells them for more. She brings in a little extra $ which is helpful. Another started doing invitations and stationary from her graphic designing background. Could you waitress 2 nights a week? Id love to but DH has an odd schedule currently. Best of luck!

Meganbryn · April 2014

I'm not sure how it works in other places but in canada you can take a year mat leave and recieve 55% of your gross income. As well as you can take a medical leave for the last 16 weeks of your pregnancy and then start your mat leave. So I'm a sahm mom for now but I will unfortunately be going back in September because we can't afford to live off of DH's income after my mat leave ends.

JamieWM · April 2014

Canada needs to give the US some pointers. I hadn't been home w LO 15 hours before DH went off the the police academy.

smilingeyes2308 · April 2014

@elm005 Oh my heck. $800 for insurance?! I live in Canada so we have "free" healthcare and I've never had to worry about any expenses health related except for prescriptions. DH is american and we're currently in the process of moving us all to the states. H came to Canada when he was 18 (now 23) and he was always on his Dad's insurance (never had to worry about his own insurance). This scares the crap out of me. I have no idea how we'd afford $800 for insurance. =/

olga1311 · April 2014

I left on maternity leave having a feeling I will end up quitting to stay at home. I ended up turning in my resignation after 12 weeks ( I had another 4 weeks left).

We discussed this and our main motivation was that we didn't want a stranger raising lo. At least until she is 1.5-2 years we want me stay home with her. Luckily DH makes enough money for us to live off his income comfortably. We did kind of plan for this so for the year leading to pregnancy and my leave we lived on his income alone and saved mine so in terms of day to day expenses we didn't feel any change when I did not return to work.

jackdaniels13 · April 2014

Ok I think I need to move to Canada! Lol My DH is in police work as well so not a huge income. I have cried once a week since starting LO in DC in Jan & I just can't stand it. I'm sure all of us new moms deal with this but I want to make sure to exhaust every idea I have before just saying I can't afford it. I've already cut back so much just to acccomdate the DC cost but I will be doing some number crunching.

DaniB091 · April 2014

I tried to go back to work and was successful for a few months. I absolutely hated having a babysitter, and LO really did not like her. I worked at home, so it made things more difficult in a way. One day she pissed me off so much, I decided she was done. So we let her go and decided I would be happier staying home with him. This was something I had wanted to do, but was nervous about the financial impact.

It was a hard decision, because my income was enough to justify childcare financially. We are having to change our lifestyle to make it work, but it will be worth it! To help make it work, we are canceling cable and switching to Hulu, which is a big sacrifice for my DH who can no longer watch hockey! We are combining cell phone plans with other family members to save on that bill. I am also doing more meal planning and wasting less food. I created a spreadsheet (yes, totally one of those excel nerds!) to keep track of everything.

Also, one thing to consider.... Without my income, we drop to a different tax bracket which frees up a couple hundred dollars a month! So that is something to look into as well.

Good luck!!

DaisyZH · April 2014

We made the switch when DS was born. We lived on just DH's income and put mine into savings during my pregnancy for extra money and also to see how realistic it would be to live on one income. Now we have a family of four on one income and it works well.

We have very affordable housing costs, although we are now looking to sell since we are in a 2 bedroom 1 bath small home and would like more space. Once we move it will be a bit tighter budget-wise. We budget every month, put money away each month for big expenses like Christmas and gifts (we have a big family with lots of birthdays), shop for groceries at Wal-Mart, buy a lot of store brands, and buy clothes at thrift shops, garage sales or Wal-Mart. We are usually able to save each month and we also share one car which is kind of a pain but saves a lot of money.

Meganbryn · April 2014

I remember seeing this chart when I was in school, I couldn't believe the states didn't offer any kind of maternity leave. It's crazy how it varies so much from place to place.

UpsideDownFrown · April 2014

@Jackdmull2013‌ just wanted to tell you you're not alone. I too cry every single Monday morning and sometimes randomly throughout the week. I know everyone says it gets easier but it doesn't seem like it is for me. We have talked about what would have to happen for me to stay home and it would mean losing the cell phones and one car payment. Additionally we could cut our cable and internet to save even more. I really really hope you can find a way to stay home, good luck!

jackdaniels13 · April 2014

Thank you. All of you have given me things to think about. I don't think financially we could do with out my pay right this minute but I am working on an exit strategy. I never thought it would be this difficult!

fairdinkum · April 2014

Cut cable and get Netflix or Hulu instead.
Switch to a prepaid cell phone (I promise this is not as bad as it sounds. Prepaid plans have come a long way).

I am only a part time SAHM, but these two things have saved me literally thousands of dollars over the last five years.

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