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April 2014 Moms
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Mombie

yellowjellybeansyellowjellybeans member
edited April 2014 in April 2014 Moms
Mom zombie.

I expected lack of sleep with a newborn but this is nothing I anticipated. He ONLY wants to sleep on my chest or DH's chest. Skin to skin mostly. We have tried swaddling tightly. We have tried rocking and swaying and shushing. We have tried white noise. We have tried the glider. The second we put him down in the PNP in our bedroom not even 5 minutes goes by before he starts crying. We tried the vibrating chair and swing. Same thing. He could be fast asleep in our arms and start the screaming cue once he has realized he's somewhere else.

I hate to say it but the only way we can get a "decent" two hour stretch before feeding again is for him to just lay on our chests or in between us in bed (with no actual co sleeping device just a pillow). It's not safe and I'm concerned.

So veteran moms what would you do? He's only 4 days old and I understand this is a new environment but we hope to at least have him sleep decently a few feet from us.
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Re: Mombie

  • babym6705babym6705 member
    ::hugs:: It will get better I promise and these days will be over so quickly. We went through the same thing with our daughter when she was a newborn. I don't want to recommend anything unsafe so I would talk to your pedi for recommendations and then take those and find out what works best for your family. However, with that said, my daughter slept on my husband and mine's chest for her first few weeks. She's now 4. I know this probably wasn't super safe but it worked for us.
    happily married since 2009, SAHM
    diagnosed with unexplained infertility, regular cycles
    Baby #1: ttc naturally for 3 years, 6 yr old daughter
    Baby #2: ttc naturally for 2 years, 2 yr old son
    Baby #3: ttc naturally since August 2016
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  • RedDawnsRevengeRedDawnsRevenge member
    DD was the same way. We did a lot of napping in shifts with DD on our chests with the edges of a waffle blanket tucked under us as a makeshift harness. This time I am armed with a moby and a NuRoo. Think about it this way: he just spent 9 months on the inside, separation is hard. If I was desperate I would nurse skin to skin for as long as he will then put him down, without trying anything fancy like swaddling. Just be mindful of the Morro reflex when you lay him down.
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  • cwm11985cwm11985 member
    It'll pass!  When my first was born he was like that for the first 7-8 days and I felt so miserable, but then it suddenly stopped and I was able to get him to sleep in the swing/pnp/rnp/bouncer.  Hang in there!
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  • janice9821janice9821 member
    My LO is 6 days old. Last night she slept in her pnp for the first time. Before that she would only sleep if DH or I held her. We thought we had tried everything! We noticed she fell asleep at her doctor's appointment yesterday on her back with nobody holding her in a warm room so we tried turning up the heat a bit and dressing her warmer, and it worked. Keep trying things! I'm sure you'll find something that works for your LO, too.
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  • jgallegosjgallegos member
    We have been in the same boat. LO will be two weeks tomorrow and he sleeps in his PNP for most of the night between feelings but always seems to have the last few hours of the night on our chests. We have been trying to keep him awake as long as he can during the day and feed him as much as I can before bed. Also have been trying to establish a bedtime routine. A14 is full mombies lol
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  • MalyJMalyJ member
    My personal opinion, the first 7-10 days is all about survival. You do whatever the heck you have to (as long as it's safe) to get some sleep and stay sane. Even if it's something you've been told will "create bad habits" or make him a "tough sleeper"... You do it these days.

    Whether it's sleeping on your chest in a chair, napping beside you on the couch, or splurging and buying a co-sleeping device just for a few days. Do what you need to. He's in a brand new world too. Once he gets used to this outside place, it'll get better.

    And if there's anyone else locally, ask for help. I wanted to do it all just DH and I...felt like I needed to prove something. Day 6 or so I caved and asked my mom to spend the night and care for DS. She woke me only to feed him and that was a turning point for me. Felt like a new woman the next day and felt like I could do this! Keep your head up!


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  • Yogini6911Yogini6911 member
    We are going through the same thing! Our son is 9 days old and the nurse recommended that before we lay him down we warm up the PnP with a heating pad. He doesn't like being swaddled with his arms constrained so we have been swaddling him with his arms left out of the swaddle. He does sleep in the co sleeper at night so I also think that where we have the PnP in the living room is possibly too bright.

    I'm also looking for advice STMs!
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  • zoopsiedaisyzoopsiedaisy member
    Just sending hugs and telling you that I thought a Mombie was a product I've not heard of. I'm going to star this thread so I can come back to it. Please update if you find something that works. Good luck!!
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  • prettyinpink84prettyinpink84 member
    edited April 2014
    Our little guy is 5 wks old (born 2/27 due 4/1) and we still have some nights (last night was one of them) where he will only sleep on our chest. I let him sleep on me especially since DH has been back to work and we have a 2 year old. So I need as much sleep between feedings to be able to handle 2 boys during the day. I just go with my gut and mom instinct. If LO is happy on you and you don't have any qualms about them sleeping on you, then go for it. Your mom instinct will kick in if it doesn't feel right. GL!

    ETA: autocorrect
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  • JoelleOKJoelleOK member
    Dr Sears has info online on safe bed sharing.
    Hang in there! Being an outside baby is hard. You will get through this.
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  • haziedazehaziedaze member
    DS1 was this until 4-5 months old. We did get some better stretches with a few tricks- warming the bed with a heating pad before transfering (remove heating pad, let mattress cool just a bit, then put baby on it). Also make sure you transfer when he's in deep sleep and not REM sleep (try the dead arm test if you lift his arm does he just let it fall or does he stir).

    In the end though, bedsharing was what worked for us. If you're looking for another perspective about safety stuff, I like this one and find it realistic and balanced: https://cosleeping.nd.edu/

    During the day babywearing saved me!
    BFP#1 9/14/10 (EDD 5/21/11); no fetal pole 6w6d, 7w4d, d&c 10/8
    BFP#2 3/16/11, beta 138; 4/12 Baby/HB DS born 9/10/11 at 29w4d due to partial abruption and PTL
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    BFP#3 8/19/13 Another boy! 17P, modified bedrest and Nifedipine helped us have a termie! DS2 born 4/19/14 at 38w5d.
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  • seannasmommy16seannasmommy16 member
    My DD was the same way and so is the one. What we have been doing is when he's awake we lay him on our bed and let him get use to not being confined or held. It's worked out great for us. We have been able to put him in his swing or bassinet without a screaming baby for hours
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  • yellowjellybeansyellowjellybeans member
    So helpful all of you! Thank you. Will try some tactics and report back.
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  • MamaFantasticMamaFantastic member
    I could have written the first response myself. We also did the tummy time with a blanket "belt" to hold baby securely on our chest while we slept propped up on the couch.

    It will pass, but in the moment it feels like the innermost circle of hell. I know. It's awful. Hang in there!!

    Tessa sleeps beautifully in her papasan-style swing chair (which detaches to be used as a floor-standing stationary chair) but both of
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  • yellowjellybeansyellowjellybeans member
    edited April 2014
    Wanted to send an update. Last night we successfully got Noah to sleep in his PnP for a few hours at a time (due to feedings) great success!

    I followed a mix of things
    A) made the general room temperature warmer
    B) made sure when he was nursing he really was in deep sleep, such that when the milk coma hits he is less aware of his new environment.
    C) put a nursing bra in the very corner of the PnP so that it has my scent
    D) this may have made the ultimate difference but I thought I knew how to swaddle before. Boy was I wrong. I followed dr Karps swaddle method in happiest baby on the block and that really helped contain him from flailing his arms.

    Now it did only work for one night (and day time naps) but hey baby steps. And would you believe I already miss cuddling with him all night?!
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  • AliciaBethAliciaBeth member
    I have a 6 day old right now. He has been a good sleeper, but I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that I know he is our last baby and I (and my husband) have been snuggling him like crazy. He pretty much stays in my arms all day long. I know, I know... but I can't help it- he is so sweet! Because of that, he sleeps for much of the day, and I sometimes close my eyes, too. 

    At night time, I will admit to giving him a little bit of a dream feed (an extra feeding right before I put him down for the night), and then I wrap him tightly in a swaddle blanket, put a hat on him, and put him in his crib. He is waking up every 3-3.5 hours right now (but keep in mind that we exclusively FF). 

    Hang in there... it will get better! 
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