Do you consider "trophey wife" offensive?

angelashly · April 2014

On the radio this morning they were talking about a song Kanye and Future wrote about Kim and Ciara. In it Kanye talks about Kim and her sister's being trophies. He also talks about beating out an NBA and NFL star. Everyone on the radio said they would be offended if someone said their daughter was a trophy wife because that means she is only pretty not smart. Why can't a trophy wife be the whole package. I haven't got to listen to the whole song,but it sounds nice.

https://radio.com/2014/04/08/listen-to-future-kanye-west-score-trophies-on-new-song-i-won/

angelashly · April 2014

It wont let me edit the title to take the E out and I don't know where the e came from

MrsCodeMonkey · April 2014

I could do without that term, but it does not offend me.

lilorangekitty · April 2014

I kinda wish I was a trophy wife...

RondackHiker · April 2014

It kind of bothers me but I can't really say why, because you it's not really saying anything bad about the wife.

I think part of it is that there's an assumption that trophy wives are just for display, and they don't work or do anything. Like, trophies just sit on the shelf, a trophy wife hangs on your arm...

I'm likely reading too much into it.

[Deleted User] · April 2014

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angelashly · April 2014

@CTGirl30‌ don't know if there is an actual term for men, but I'm sure there is.

I think what bothers me most is that trophy automatically means only pretty. Couldn't he be saying he got his trophy because he feels like he won the best woman?

angelashly · April 2014

Thanks @CTGirl30‌ I wish we could change tat meaning then because I have no problems being a trophy because like @HilarityEnsued‌ said I am the bomb.com and my so won the ultimate trophy.

[Deleted User] · April 2014

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theseaword · April 2014

I don't think trophy wife implies the whole package. I think it only implies beautiful. It's not a compliment, as it basically treats the woman as an object. It's a good object, since it's a "trophy" but it's still an object to be obtained by a man. The woman's only role as a trophy wife would be as a status symbol for the husband, like a sports car or a Rolex.

I don't think it's high up on the list if offensive things, but I don't think it's a good thing, either.

Drea926 · April 2014

A guy in college once told me I'd make a good trophy wife one day. I didn't know whether to be complimented or offended. :P

Maebb · April 2014

It doesn't bother me. I also heard part of the lyrics -

"I want to dip that ass in gold, I want to dip that ass in gold / I made it over NBA, NFL players / So every time I score it’s like the Super Bowl. Baby, we should hit the south of France / So you could run around without them pants."

It doesn't bother me, and I wouldn't feel bad if my H said that. I'm not sure I would want Kim's ass, but it's kind of nice that he thinks she's so hot he wants to make a statue out of her ass.

Pips09 · April 2014

I'm not offended by it, but I don't think it's flattering. It implies a wife that is only good for arm candy, doesn't offer anything else and is replaceable.

BluepointToasted · April 2014

Yeah, if I overheard DH referring to me as a trophy wife I think I would be pretty good with it. But I think about it more like he is proud to be with me. Like I am proud to have a hot, smart, successful husband, he is proud to have a hot, smart, successful wife. Who bakes a mean cookie as well.

Damn, I really am a catch.

theseaword · April 2014

LoisLayn23 said:
I always associate with it gorgeous. Not a sugar daddy situation or that she's just arm candy, but that she's hot as hell and anyone would be proud to show her off. Not offensive.

But "proud to show her off" implies her beauty reflects the success of the husband. That her hotness is his reward for being such an awesome dude.

angelashly · April 2014

TwilightMV said:

LoisLayn23 said:
I always associate with it gorgeous. Not a sugar daddy situation or that she's just arm candy, but that she's hot as hell and anyone would be proud to show her off. Not offensive.
But "proud to show her off" implies her beauty reflects the success of the husband. That her hotness is his reward for being such an awesome dude.

But how many woman here said that they would be flattered if a woman thought her husband was hot? Woman do it to men too. I don't think that means success for men.

theseaword · April 2014

angelashly said:

TwilightMV said:

LoisLayn23 said:
I always associate with it gorgeous. Not a sugar daddy situation or that she's just arm candy, but that she's hot as hell and anyone would be proud to show her off. Not offensive.
But "proud to show her off" implies her beauty reflects the success of the husband. That her hotness is his reward for being such an awesome dude.
But how many woman here said that they would be flattered if a woman thought her husband was hot? Woman do it to men too. I don't think that means success for men.

Trophy wife label is typically reserved for the wife of someone who is rich. If a person is not rich, it's more like "Joe has a hot wife" and not "joe has a trophy wife ". The trophy part is what indicates that she is his reward for success.

Smootchy · April 2014

meh. I wish I were a trophy wife fffc/uo?

Smootchy · April 2014

WhoCanItBeNow said:

chapski said:

meh. I wish I were a trophy wife fffc/uo?

So you want to be valued only for your looks and nothing more?

It's fucking sad that some women think so little of themselves that they feel they have nothing more to offer than being something nice to look at while being fucked.

I was more so just joking about having a rich husband..

theseaword · April 2014

No trophies for poor people. You can have a hot wife as a poor person, but not a trophy wife.

Smootchy · April 2014

WhoCanItBeNow said:

chapski said:

WhoCanItBeNow said:

chapski said:

meh. I wish I were a trophy wife fffc/uo?

So you want to be valued only for your looks and nothing more?

It's fucking sad that some women think so little of themselves that they feel they have nothing more to offer than being something nice to look at while being fucked.

I was more so just joking about having a rich husband..

So you want a sugar daddy. Not the same thing. Poor/middle class guys have trophy wives too.

oh sorry, thought we were going off the "rich guys hot wife = trophy wife. poor/middle class guys hot wife = hot wife"

Maebb · April 2014

CTGirl30 said:
@Maebb - those lyrics are gross, as is Kanye. I feel like he's so fucking narcissitic that he wants to brag about Kim like he won a prize - not because he genuinely cares about her (although maybe he does but really? "I wanna dip that ass in gold?") And like he "beat out" her exes?

@CTGirl30‌, I am just saying that I'm not personally offended by the lyrics.

Kanye is a narcissistic douche anyway, so maybe in the context of everything else he says, this is bad, but taken by itself in a dream world where he loves and respects his wife, I wouldn't be offended by being called a trophy wife, saying that he beat out my exes, or that he'd want to dip my ass in gold. If he loves and respects me as a person and treats me as an equal, I don't mind if we are each other's trophies.

vandelay · April 2014

The term doesn't really bother me; I think it is more of an indictment of the man's character than of the wife herself.

Not related to my point, but there's a Stephen Wright joke I like: "A friend of mine has a trophy wife...I don't think it's for first place."

theimpossibleastronaut · April 2014

I like the show Trophy Wife. Other than that, I don't know how I feel about the term.

my5sons · April 2014

LOL

[Deleted User] · April 2014

To me, trophy wife implies that you're an accessory to a man's life. You're not a partnership, you're a prize. In that sense, no, I don't find it offensive, because no one can make you a trophy wife without your permission.

It doesn't matter if you're hot and your H and is older and rich. If you stand up for yourself and live an independent life outside of pleasing him, you're not a trophy wife.

[Deleted User] · April 2014

Also, how the hell did Kanye beat out anyone? They got the booty too, but he has to marry her crazy ass.

roxannegennae · April 2014

I think it depends what you consider trophy. Not just anyone can get a trophy. People usually get a trophy with hardwork and dedication. Trophies can be old as dirt but that doesn't change the value. It doesn't change what you went through to get it. You have to earn a trophy and it only goes to those who deserves it.I consider myself a trophy wife. Something my husband is proud of because he worked hard to get and isn't afraid to show off. I'm educated, I have a career, I cook, clean, take care of our son. My husband respects me tremendously and loves to talk about how beautiful and amazing I am lol. My husband is my trophy husband as well. He's educated, owns his own business, cooks, cleans, and takes care of our son! We call ourselves the power couple because we put God in the center of our life and we work hard to be successful.