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Advice needed-Bringing home new baby

BGGP9196BGGP9196 member
in Toddlers: 24 Months+

My DD1 will be 2.5 years old when DD2 makes her appearance.  Anyone have any tips or tricks of helping with DD1's adjustment from being an only child to having a little sister?  We have been talking about a little sister since we found out.  We have a couple of books about Big sisters and Little Sisters.  I have a gift bag with puzzles, a shirt, a big sister ribbon to give her from DD2 at the hospital.  But I nervous about when we come home so anything you can offer would be great!

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Re: Advice needed-Bringing home new baby

  • LSU628LSU628 member
    It's hard, but try keeping your DD's schedule as regular as possible. I let DD stay home a few days after DS was born, but then it was back to school as normal. We also made a real effort to keep mealtimes and bedtimes as normal as possible. We also included her a lot, let her pick out which diaper DS wore, which PJs, and we let her pick a present for him to give to him at the hospital. I also really tried to cuddle with DD alot when DS was napping- she got a little jealous of everyone holding and snuggling the baby.
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  • dairygirl19dairygirl19 member

    Ditto the pp on keeping the schedule the same. It's much easier to drag a newborn through the day with a toddler than make a strong willed toddler plod through the day with a newborn. She still goes to the same classes, I didn't take her out of DC etc.

    Our transition hasn't been that bad. I give her one on one time when the baby is sleeping (Which is still a lot) and she seems fine with it. I let her help as much as she can/wants to and she's quite good at it.

    Really though at 2.5 she rotates between smothering him with kisses and ignoring him completely. It was nowhere near as awful as people made it out to be for us.

    We have also had tons of visitors and family which helped. She thought it was fun and had playmates which made her days go by that much faster.

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  • sunnyday016sunnyday016 member
    My DD was a month shy of turning 3 when DS was born. We kept her schedule the same. She was going to daycare 2x per week at that point, so we kept her going. We tried to include her as much as we could in taking care of DS (like bringing us a diaper & wipes, etc) but she really had very little interest in him. We made an effort to do some one on one time with her without DS around. 

    We did have a rough transition. I think DS's birth coincided with a big leap for her developmentally at 3 and she had a lot of tantrums and rough days. We got through it one day at a time!
    S- March 09 E- Feb 12 L- May 15


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  • Jam+1Jam+1 member
    What other posters said...plus this...we had little gifts stored away for the big sis from little sis to distribute as needed. 
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  • janinekrausejaninekrause member

    My daughter was 3 when my second was born. Similar to PP, I let her help a lot- she felt like the big kid. We also started doing Saturdays with mom or dad. Every Saturday, my husband or I would go out alone with her for a treat- breakfast, a play place, etc etc.

    I also very very rarely didnt do something for her because I was busy with the baby. If the baby was crying, and I was reading her a book for example, I didnt stop right away. I finished the book, and then went to get the baby.  It was interesting because very often, she would say- go get her, she's crying. That simple thing- vs. not now, I am busy- i have to get the baby, made her feel very much in control and helped. Nothing happens when babies cry for a few minutes :) It was pretty easy because the baby slept a lot, and as got older, hung out and watched what we did.

    In addition, I bought a few gifts that I kept in case people came over and brough the baby a gift- most people understand 3 year olds and brought her also a little treat (stickers, etc). But if they didnt- i gave them something to give her.

     

    They are VERY close and my older one is so protective of her, and always has been. They are now  2 and 5. My goal- from my mother's advice :) was to never make her jealous that she was losing any time with us, and include her a lot.

    Our transition was so easy for my big one.

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  • lana22lana22 member
    DS was younger, 16 months, but agree with making older child a helper with anything and everything, and giving lots of focused attention while baby is napping. 

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  • MamaAllisonMamaAllison member
    We did everything you are doing, and we involved DD1 in as much as possible - she helped decorate the nursery, and she went to toys r us to pick out a toy for the new baby. We talked about the new baby (using her name) as much as possible. I think that and the books were the biggest thing that made a difference. DD1 LOVES her new sister and it has been great to watch her with LO.
    DD1 - Evelyn Riley - 9/30/11
    DD2 - Charlotte Avery - 1/27/14




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  • chicsahmchicsahm member
    Hope everything is going well! Your DD is adorable! Life with 2 was such an adjustment for me!! For DS I kept his routine as normal as I could and I also didn't "push" anything baby onto him. He is adjusting at his own time. Not forcing him to hold baby etc. We would ask if he wants to kiss his Sissy but that is about it, sometimes he would and others not. Now he will do it on his own! Still doesn't want to hold her but whatever! He cried at her Dr. apt when she got her shots… he loves her. And your DS will adjust and do great too!
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  • SVAQ11SVAQ11 member
    DD #1 is 26 months and we just brought home DD #2 3 weeks ago. We did all the stuff you mentioned and, now that our second has arrived, we are doing a few other things. We ask DD #1 to help with lots of stuff and give her lots of praise for being a big helper. Even if it is totally stupid. Like, I'll ask her to help me carry the baby's car seat across the room when we are going out and she'll grab the handle with me and we'll walk it over to where DD #2 is sitting in her bassinet. Also, to try to avoid having DD #1 feel like she is always coming second to her little sister's needs, I will make a point to say to DD #2 that I need to put her down for a few minutes to help DD #1 with something like getting some water, or fixing a broken toy. Obviously, my newborn doesn't get it and I am not really saying it for her benefit, but my older DD hears me telling the baby to wait so it isn't so annoying when I am always telling her to wait while I take care of her little sister.
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