My daughter wanted to honor her brother's memory, so...

Cocoasushi · April 2014

I shared this on the miscarriage board yesterday, too. It made me smile, and I wanted to share it here too hoping to spread some more smiles to you wonderful ladies.

Yesterday my son would have been 1 month old. The loss of our baby boy, Link, has been hard on the whole family. Luckily, our 4 year old daughter Piper has been a huge factor in helping us accept what happened and heal.

She asked me, "Mommy, can I dye my hair blue?" I honestly didn't think twice when I said yes. I didn't know why she wanted blue hair. Her father and I encourage her to express her individuality and be herself, and it isn't the first time she's wanted to experiment with her hair, so it wasn't really a big deal to me to help her do it. We bought her some hair color while we were out, and put it in right away after we got home. I asked her, "What made you want to dye your hair blue?" The last time she dyed her hair, she wanted a streak of Manic Panic brand red in her hair. I asked her why red then, too. Back then, it was because she had seen a picture of me in high school and she loved my hair, and wanted to have hair like mommy used to. This time though, her answer made me cry both tears of joy and pain. She said, "Well mommy, blue is a boy color, right? And Link was a boy. And I miss him bunches and wanna remember him by making it a boy color, so every time my hair falls in my face I see blue and remember him! And when people ask my why I have blue hair, I can tell them ALL about him!" I'm heartbroken because I know she loves and misses her baby brother so much even though she never really met him, but I'm so, so incredibly proud of her for being so honest and wanting people to know that she is a big sister, even if her mommy doesn't have a living baby for her to hug.

ikrystal · April 2014

Oh God. That is so sweet. This is why sometimes I think I need to have more babies, just so someone else can remember Conner and Ben after my husband and I are gone.