A neat article about childhood

JJsMum · April 2014

I found this article and it really struck a chord for me. I've found myself getting so jealous of all the mama's I know who throw that perfect, pinterest inspired party for their kids every year. I barely remember to throw a party at all! Or the ones that always have some cute craft or activity they are doing with their kid. I think it's so easy to think how perfect everyone else's life is (thanks social media) that you don't realize how great your own is. This article made me think back to my childhood, and how happy I could be with a stick and a tree to hit with it!

SusieBW · April 2014

Someone I know posted this on FB the other day, too. DH read somewhere that there is actually a clinical diagnosis out there now that relates to the low self-esteem that people develop based on viewing everyone else's positive things on social media. Technology is evil.

angeltennis3 · April 2014

I agree and disagree with this article. I think that social media has made us strive to live these picture perfect lives, which adds so much stress. Especially when you throw children into the picture, nothing is predictable.

I think scheduling out every activity is overboard and you need to give your children an opportunity to learn to play on their own and develop their own creativity, but I also think this article takes it to the extreme when it says their parents never played with them and only planned the occasional special surprise.

Some of my favorite memories from my childhood are spending time with my family. My dad would chase us around the house and "capture" us for a tickle attack. My mom would buy shaving cream in the winter and we would build indoor sculptures. A special activity every day is overboard but I fully intend to do these types of fun activities with my kids often. I don't need to brag about it on social media and I don't need to drop a bundle of cash. My parents usually played with us in some way almost every day, and I wouldn't trade that for the world.

I think you have to find the fine line right for your family and remember it's ok not to be perfect. and it's ok to talk about not being perfect with your mommy friends because someone else may be struggling with feeling inadequate.

ZandriaProsser · April 2014

I really liked this article, and completely agree with the author that some of my best memories are just spending time with my parents at the park, and using my imagination with my sister. We couldn't afford to go on trips until my teenage years, but I never felt like we went without!

I have a friend who has a toddler and one year old twins, she has an amazing handle on life and I often wonder how she does it because before I got pregnant I struggled with remembering to change the laundry over, let alone remembering craft supplies for each day when I'm out and about! But then I remember you do what works for your family.

Great read.

JJsMum · April 2014

angeltennis3 said:

I agree and disagree with this article. I think that social media has made us strive to live these picture perfect lives, which adds so much stress. Especially when you throw children into the picture, nothing is predictable. I think scheduling out every activity is overboard and you need to give your children an opportunity to learn to play on their own and develop their own creativity, but I also think this article takes it to the extreme when it says their parents never played with them and only planned the occasional special surprise. Some of my favorite memories from my childhood are spending time with my family. My dad would chase us around the house and "capture" us for a tickle attack. My mom would buy shaving cream in the winter and we would build indoor sculptures. A special activity every day is overboard but I fully intend to do these types of fun activities with my kids often. I don't need to brag about it on social media and I don't need to drop a bundle of cash. My parents usually played with us in some way almost every day, and I wouldn't trade that for the world. I think you have to find the fine line right for your family and remember it's ok not to be perfect. and it's ok to talk about not being perfect with your mommy friends because someone else may be struggling with feeling inadequate.

I do think the article takes it too far the other direction too, but I think the underlying message is pretty spot on. I remember my parents playing with us too, but maybe not the all-day interaction that seems to be becoming more the norm. My friend and neighbour has a 6 y/o that cannot entertain herself and always expects mom (or someone) to be the source of her entertainment. I desperately want to avoid that for my kids!

I'm pretty open with people on how my life is not perfect, and try to convey that it's ok to admit your life isn't perfect. It does seem to be hard, especially for new moms, to admit that life is damn hard sometimes. I volunteer through PEPS in my area and so many of the new moms come to the first few meetings dressed up with full makeup on trying to make like everything is so perfect. By the end of the group, the real stories and moms start showing up

SusieBW · April 2014

I found a lot of what the article said about playing on your own to be completely, completely true of my childhood. We would get up in the morning in the summer and take off to ride bikes or play with our friends, and while we might stop home for lunch, more often than not, we'd call and check in that we were having lunch at whatever friend's house, and then come home in time for dinner. Jump in the pool in lieu of a bath, off to bed and do it all again the next day. In the winter, we'd be out playing in the giant snow piles in the huge church parking lot across the street.

I think the point of the article, more that the amount of supervision or parental play, was that as kids, our generation used to be able to make our own fun in pretty much any setting, and didn't need the structure that today's kids have. The biggest difference, I think is that people no longer trust "society" and so don't let their kids roam the neighborhood freely like we used to, and that's a fair concern. I'm not sure whether our world is actually more dangerous now than it was back then, or if the media just has us convinced that is the case, but that's a whole other argument. Either way, if you're kids aren't permitted to run free, there is inevitably more pressure to come up with activities to entertain them. The catch 22 is that if you spend their early childhood providing those sources of entertainment, then they grow up without the imagination and creativity to create their own down the road. Instead of doing elaborate arts and crafts projects with them, try just handing over a few paper towel tubes and a cardboard box and see what they come up with on their own.

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