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Trouble TTC
CandaceC1020
member
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Why, why why?
CandaceC1020
member
I guess the universe felt that I was long overdue for one of my self induced pity parties. 
Received a facebook messenger message today from one of my aunts. Message says:
Giving you a heads up. Jordon's girlfriend is pregnant and due in September.
Jordon is my 21 year old cousin. He's dating an 18 year old girl who just graduated high school last year and does not have a job. My cousin Jordon does have a job, but it's not a stable 'this job will support a family' job.
I'm open to a degree with my family about my IF struggles. They know that we're seeking treatment. They just don't know the details. They don't know that I had my first IUI last Saturday. They don't know that I'm in the two week wait. They don't know about how badly I want a child. They don't know about the prayers that I say every day hoping to be able to get pregnant, have a healthy, nine month pregnancy with a healthy baby.
Damnit, I'm 34 years old. I'm married. I have a good job and my husband has a great job. We have a roof over our heads, we have food on our table, we have cars to get to our jobs, we have clothes on our backs. We have the means to support an addition to our family. What the hell does my 21 year old cousin and his jobless 18 year old girlfriend have? Nothing other than my aunt will help take care of the baby.
I've made it through the weekend without pissing on a stick. Friday is my beta day. I'm trying my hardest to stay positive, but getting this news today has completely rattled my hope and faith. I have a feeling this weekend is going to suck. Good thing is that I scheduled a massage as a treat for myself for Saturday morning. If I get a negative beta test on Friday, I'll be a drunk asshole Saturday afternoon. I have six bottles of wine in my wine rack that are ready for consumption.
Married on October 20, 2012. Began trying in January 2013.
RE appointment & testing December 2013 - February 2014= Unexplained IF, possible endometriosis
IUI#1- March 22 (100mg clomid, 75 mg of Bravelle, Ovidrel trigger) = BFP!!!
RE appointment & testing December 2013 - February 2014= Unexplained IF, possible endometriosis
IUI#1- March 22 (100mg clomid, 75 mg of Bravelle, Ovidrel trigger) = BFP!!!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Why, why why?
Me: 30 DH: 29
TTC since 2010
Oct. 2012 HSG: One blocked tube, one clear
Oct. 2012 U/S: All good
March 2014 SA: Flying Colors
April 2014: Met our RE/Got our plan!
May 2014: laparoscopy/hysteroscopy removed stage II endometriosis
June 2014: IUI w/100mg Clomid (BFN)
2008: HSG (normal), couple rounds of clomid through gyno
2008 - 2010: dragging my feet out of fear and procrastination
October 2010: first consultation with RE, dx PCOS and fibroids (DH slightly low count/motility)
Oct. 2010 - Dec. 2012: In DENIAL! avoided the issue because I was scared of surgery
January 2013: returned to RE, fibroids grew significantly
February 2013: second HSG, fibroids pushed on tubes which blocked them somewhat
March 2013: MRI to determine what type of surgery may be necessary
July 29, 2013: fibroids (5) removed via robotic laparascopy
August 2013 - Nov 2013 : benched due to recent surgery
IUI #3, Feb. 25, 2014 BFN
IUI #4 canceled due to lack of response to letrozole
IUI #4.1 April 28, 2014, BFN
May 16, 2014: wtf consult, start prepping for IVF in June and add injects for one last IUI in the meantime
IUI #5 started letrozole and bravelle but canceled after HSG led to new diagnosis
May 21, 2014: third HSG, tubes blocked, one at the beginning, one hydrosalpinx??
IVF #1 August 8, 2014 - 3dt of 2 embryos, BFN
September 17, 2014 - 4th HSG, the right tube is very patent (open!!) dye went straight through this time. Weird!
October 2, 2014 - started metformin treatment
November 14, 2014 - blood work, brought A1C down from 5.8 to 5.5
November 26, 2014 - RE finally back from vaca and reviewed my chart, no more IVFs for rest of calendar year
December 1, 2014 - Right after Thanksgiving, I called a new clinic and got in right away! Plan for IVF
December 17, 2014 - ER! 29 retrieved (!!), 16 mature, all 16 fertilized (ICSI)
IVF #2 December 20, 2014 - 3dt of 3 embryos, BFN
We are done with treatment unsuccessfully.
TTC since March 2012
DX: MFI (4% motility)
Cycle 13: Natural cycle w/ HSG test = BFP
Identical twins!
Lost my angel boys at 10.5 weeks
Cycle 14-16: Natural Cycles = BFN
Cycle 17: Follistim + Trigger + IUI = BFN
Cycle 18: Natural Cycle = BFN
Cycle 19: Follistim + Trigger +IUI#2
Polyp found: SIS 11/11 - hysteroscopy 11/14
Cycle 20: Follistim + IUI#2 = BFFN
Cycle 21: Follistim (adj. dosage) + IUI#3 TI = BFN
IUI cancelled due to weather
Cycle 22: Follistim + IUI#3.1 = BFN
Cycle 23: treatment break, IVF consult
Cycle 24 - 26: natural cycle w/ acupuncture + Chinese herbs = BFN
Cycle 27: Follistim + IUI#4 = BFFN
Natural Cycles until IVF
Cycle 30: IVF#1 - Starting with Menopur + Follistim + Ganirelix
17 retrieved, 12 fertilized, 5dt w/ 2 blasts, 5 frosties
Betas: #1-156(9dp5dt), #2-1200(13dp5) #3-6112(17dp5)
Ultrasound #1 10/6: 1 bean!
TEAM BLUE!
My Chart
~~ALL WELCOME~~
I will keep you in my prayers for your Friday beta.
PCOS | Anovulatory | Metformin + Letrozole
TTC since 08/2012
DX: DOR
Temping since Nov 2012, off BC since July 2011
SA: Beyond Awesome
CD3 BW (AMH:2.7, estrogen high:106) , low progesterone 7DPO
OB diagnosed "weak ovulation"
IUI #1 Jan 2014- 5mg letrozole, m/c 6w3d, betas slow to decrease
IUI #2 Mar 2014- 5mg letrozole BFN
IVF#1 Apr/May 2014 16R/12M/8F. Transferred 2 blasts, 3 on ice
Me 33, DH 37 -- TTC since Jan'12 -- Low AMH (0.78) & endo, SA w/ low motility
IUI's 1-3 = BFN, IVF converted to IUI 4/13 = BFN
IVF 1.2: 8R 6M 4F -- 2 blastocysts frozen, FET 8/15 = BFP!!
Beta #s = 445;1,098; 9,545 -- EDD 5/2 -- Team Pink!
TTC since 12/2012 Me: hypothyroid & egg issues
DH: MFI
IUI #1 BFN
2nd treatment cycle: Clomid & TI BFN
IUI #2 (injects) IUI BFN
2/14 through 3/14 benched with a cyst
IVF#1 CD1 came before beta. BFN. No frosties.
Benched with cysts...
IVF#2 beta moved up due to heavy bleeding 6dp5dt...beta was 11. beta#2 20.4! Beta#3 28 Chemical pregnancy
Currently on BCPs with cysts, planning IVF#3 Everyone welcome!
I simply hope that the two 'adults' realize how lucky they are to have a child when there are so many of us out here that desperately want a baby. I hope that my cousin and his girlfriend take responsibility for the baby and be proper parents. Their lives are about to change and they need to do their best to be the parents that this baby deserves.
I realize that I do have a great deal to be thankful for. I need to stay positive and focus on the good things in my life. Thanks for all of the well wishes and hugs ladies. I definitely appreciate the support that I've received here more than any of you will ever know.
RE appointment & testing December 2013 - February 2014= Unexplained IF, possible endometriosis
IUI#1- March 22 (100mg clomid, 75 mg of Bravelle, Ovidrel trigger) = BFP!!!
1) ((((HUGS)))) - that is really unfair
I know how you feel. Whenever I see someone unprepared get knocked up I get very resentful. It's infuriating how some people are careless with birth control and then they're pregnant - and then others try, try, try but have a hard time conceiving. I'll never understand that. Try to stay optimistic! You may get your BFP this cycle after all. I'll be stalking you to see your beta!
2) Is your gif the scene from the L Word when Alice finds out Dana died from breast cancer? OMG, I ugly cried after that episode for an hour. And when I hear "You Are My Sunshine" I tear up. I get that they were trying to send a message or whatever, but they didn't have to rip my heart out and stomp on it AND ruin one of my favorite childhood songs.
First TTC Journey:
- Failed attempts at clomid with OB
- HSG with OB, nothing found
- Met with RE. Laparoscopy/Hysteroscopy done on 08/04/2014. Results: Hymenal stenosis, minimal endometriosis, and PCOS
Please know that you are not alone in how you are feeling. (((((HUGS)))))
Me: 30 DW (aka C): 29
Together since 2/15/11 ~ Legally married in NY on 9/29/12
***CP mentioned***
We've been working on baby #1 since July 2013 using Open ID donor sperm. 8 IUI attempts with 5 actual IUIs and one chemical pregnancy. We have one fresh IVF cycle under our belts as well as a FET. I have endometriosis and a uterine septum that was corrected via surgery in November 2013.
11/14/14 - Second HSG shows that tubes are still clear and ute is looking good.
12/6/14 - Started BCPs in prep for IVF #2
12/22/14 - Saline u/s and endometrial scratch (All was clear and OUCH!)
1/2/15 - Began stimming for IVF #2
****All Welcome!****
We are Mommas to four fur babies - 3 dogs and 1 cat.
Waited a long time, tried a lot of stuff, science made me a mom.
Trying to have baby #1 since April 2013
DH SA March,May 2014 - Low motility and shape issues. On vitamins per RE to help
Me testing April 3, 2014 - FSH and LH good, HSG showed blocked right tube
April 29, 2014 - First RE appt., right tube needs to be removed and possibly left also if
it's bad too. RE suggests going straight to IVF
June 4, 2014 - LAP/HSC and unexpected endo. removed but tubes got to stay!
June 13, 2014 - Post-Op appointment. We decide where to go next since main issue
is MFI influenced. Trying naturally until decision... Repeat SA in September. Aiming for IUI #1 November 2014.
Waiting is making me crazy. I'm losing hope. I hate progesterone because I have all of these crazy side effects that make me think I'm pregnant. Ugh. I don't know how I'm going to be able to go through this again.
RE appointment & testing December 2013 - February 2014= Unexplained IF, possible endometriosis
IUI#1- March 22 (100mg clomid, 75 mg of Bravelle, Ovidrel trigger) = BFP!!!