Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
StacyLH24
member
**
Re: TTC Check-In
I'm 8 dpiui. I've failed in my attempt to be much more zen this cycle and forget how many dpiui I am. I took my first test this morning, obviously BFN. I figure I'll test every day until Friday, then I'll stop so DW and I can celebrate her birthday. I'm due to start on Tuesday, the day after her birthday.
This past weekend we picked out our next donor (assuming this cycle doesn't take). It was a lot easier than I expected. I just read through a couple profiles, and when I got to this guy's, I decided he was it and I was done. My wife read through all the profiles that met our filters and made little flash cards for each one, but still ended up picking the same one as me. I like him a lot, so that makes me feel better about having to move on to another donor.
We also discussed taking a break next cycle, and I think we're going to do it. We'll be able to drink on our vacation in Puerto Rico and at my sister-in-law's wedding, and we're also planning to do bootcamp for a month in preperation for the wedding. There is a risk that we'll end up having to take a break for two months because I might ovulate while we're in CA for the wedding, but I think I'm okay with that.
QOTW: Highlight of the weekend was a baby shower I went to for the couple that run the Spansih language school I take classes at. It was quite the party. There was so much English and Spanish going on, and I got to have conversations in each. I'm very excited for the arrival of their baby!
Me: 28 DW: 28
Together since 5/30/02. Married since 8/31/08
IUI#1 - 12/13/13 = BFN
IUI#2 - 1/22/14 = BFN
IUI#3 - 2/21/14 = BFN
IUI#4 - 3/23/14
A semi-close friend texted us both this morning and finally told us that she is pregnant. We guessed a while back but were waiting for her to tell us. Turns out that she is having twin boys. It was a little bit of a blow, even though we already knew. I don't think I would be quite as upset if it wasn't for the fact that 6 months ago she was on our couch saying that she wasn't sure if she wanted to be with her husband anymore. They already have a daughter who will be two in a few months.
As we got the news, I was starting to fill out an application to see if we can get a loan for the money to cover IVF. We have two vials left. We are moving forward with an IUI for this cycle. If this one does not work, then we will move forward with IVF for the last vial, assuming that everything lines up financially.
QOTW: My highlight of the weekend was the 1st birthday party we went to for one of C's cousin's daughters. It was a great time! We don't get to see them often and I'm glad we were able to travel to the party.
Me: 30 DW (aka C): 29
Together since 2/15/11 ~ Legally married in NY on 9/29/12
***CP mentioned***
We've been working on baby #1 since July 2013 using Open ID donor sperm. 8 IUI attempts with 5 actual IUIs and one chemical pregnancy. We have one fresh IVF cycle under our belts as well as a FET. I have endometriosis and a uterine septum that was corrected via surgery in November 2013.
11/14/14 - Second HSG shows that tubes are still clear and ute is looking good.
12/6/14 - Started BCPs in prep for IVF #2
12/22/14 - Saline u/s and endometrial scratch (All was clear and OUCH!)
1/2/15 - Began stimming for IVF #2
****All Welcome!****
We are Mommas to four fur babies - 3 dogs and 1 cat.
I'm on CD 6 today. I'm sitting this cycle out and we'll try next time around since I have quite a bit of stress going on with my work and all. I should get my period at the end of April and then it will be go time! I'm excited and optimistic
I think I'm going to try acupuncture. There's an acupuncture office that works in conjunction with my RE and they specialize in fertility, and do a series for IUI patients. May as well give it a shot. In the meantime, they suggest doing acupuncture once a week before the next cycle. I'm going to call and see if they can refer me to anyone in town for this month since it's hard to get to Indy for my appointments in April but I can get a couple rounds in before my next IUI!
I would love, love, love to get back to exercising but for now I just can't. I've been suffering from a terrible case of bronchitis. I wake up every morning with lungs full of fluid that I have to expel multiple times throughout the night. It's gotten to the point where C wants me to sleep in the guest bedroom
I suppose I may as well because then I can at least hack up the crud without running to the bathroom and just get it out in a bucket or something. The worst thing about bronchitis is how endless it feels. It takes weeks to heal. So that means no treadmill for me. If I have a hard enough time breathing just sitting at my desk, I can't imagine a good, hard run will benefit my lungs much. Once I'm well again, I can't wait to get started again.
For now I'm doing well eating low-carb. Gonna keep that up until after my next IUI. I've been making soups to eat throughout the week for lunch that are packed full of vegetables. I don't like veggies very much but they're good when they're soft and flavored with herbs and chicken broth. Tonight I'm going to make a roasted butternut squash bisque (vegan) for the week. Next week I may do a mushroom soup, and the week after tomato & basil. Goes well with my low-carb wrap! Yummy!
QOTW: We had some friends over from out of town for a dinner party. It was a lot of fun! I forget how much I enjoy entertaining until I'm able to do it again. They got engaged recently and told us the full story
It was very sweet.
QOTW: Highlight of the weekend was definitely being able to spend a little more time with my wife. We both got out of work way earlier than expected yesterday so we were able to bond for a little bit more than usual. Our schedules always have us at odds when it comes to our days off.
QOTW: C's sister was in town this weekend...we had a pretty good time, it was really nice to see her!
Queer coupled and having a BABY with the love of my life! Love my life and wouldn't have it any other way!
First IUI 1/22/2013 BFN: 2/7/2013, Second IUI 2/21/2013 BFN: 3/9/2013, Third IUI 4/23/2013 BFN: 5/8/2013, Fourth IUI 5/24/2013 BFN: 6/7/2013, Fifth IUI 6/24/2013 BFN: 7/8/2013
C began IUI's
7/23/2013 C's first IUI BFN, 8/21/2013 C's second IUI BFN , Took a break in September and October, 11/05/2013 C's 3rd IUI (TWW...we meet again...) BFN, Took off the month to switch to an RE. 01/01/2014 C's 4th IUI...BFP!!!!!!!! Beta #1- 17, Beta #2- 34, Beta #3-140.... 6W Ultra-Sound Reveals nothing in Gestation Sack... Natural M/C at 7W, 2/3/2014
03/21/2014 IUI #10...BFP!!! Beta #1- 48, Beta #2- 416, Beta #3- 1018. GROW BABY GROW!!!
1st Ultrasound 4/22/2014 Baby Squints is PERFECT! Measuring at 6w2d with a heartbeat of 129. EDD: 12/12/14.
Ultrasound at 18 weeks on 7/14/2014. Baby is healthy and growing just as she should!
Check out my blog at: http://journeytoparenthoodandmakingmilk.blogspot.com/
BFP TTC #1 May 1997
Mathilda Winifred "Tilde" born 3 February 1998
TTC #2 with DW (IUI with DS) (DW carrying) May 2005 - December 2005
TTC #2 with DW (IVF with DS) (DW carrying) January 2006 - May 2006
BFP TTC #2 May 2006
Nova Kathrine born 9 November 2006
Nova finally became legally mine 1 January 2009
Married DW 2 January 2009
TTC #3 with DW (Surrogacy with DE) March 2014 - ????
No matter what the outcome is, we are all here to support both of you.
Me: 30 DW (aka C): 29
Together since 2/15/11 ~ Legally married in NY on 9/29/12
***CP mentioned***
We've been working on baby #1 since July 2013 using Open ID donor sperm. 8 IUI attempts with 5 actual IUIs and one chemical pregnancy. We have one fresh IVF cycle under our belts as well as a FET. I have endometriosis and a uterine septum that was corrected via surgery in November 2013.
11/14/14 - Second HSG shows that tubes are still clear and ute is looking good.
12/6/14 - Started BCPs in prep for IVF #2
12/22/14 - Saline u/s and endometrial scratch (All was clear and OUCH!)
1/2/15 - Began stimming for IVF #2
****All Welcome!****
We are Mommas to four fur babies - 3 dogs and 1 cat.
Together 11 years ~ Married 4 years
IUI #3 - April 2014 - Monitored, 100mg Clomid CD1-5. Ovidrel w/ one 24mm follicle on CD13, back-to-back IUI w/ donor sperm CD14-15... BFP on 5/1/14 ... EDD: 1/10/15
Me: 30 DW (aka C): 29
Together since 2/15/11 ~ Legally married in NY on 9/29/12
***CP mentioned***
We've been working on baby #1 since July 2013 using Open ID donor sperm. 8 IUI attempts with 5 actual IUIs and one chemical pregnancy. We have one fresh IVF cycle under our belts as well as a FET. I have endometriosis and a uterine septum that was corrected via surgery in November 2013.
11/14/14 - Second HSG shows that tubes are still clear and ute is looking good.
12/6/14 - Started BCPs in prep for IVF #2
12/22/14 - Saline u/s and endometrial scratch (All was clear and OUCH!)
1/2/15 - Began stimming for IVF #2
****All Welcome!****
We are Mommas to four fur babies - 3 dogs and 1 cat.
Me: 30 DW (aka C): 29
Together since 2/15/11 ~ Legally married in NY on 9/29/12
***CP mentioned***
We've been working on baby #1 since July 2013 using Open ID donor sperm. 8 IUI attempts with 5 actual IUIs and one chemical pregnancy. We have one fresh IVF cycle under our belts as well as a FET. I have endometriosis and a uterine septum that was corrected via surgery in November 2013.
11/14/14 - Second HSG shows that tubes are still clear and ute is looking good.
12/6/14 - Started BCPs in prep for IVF #2
12/22/14 - Saline u/s and endometrial scratch (All was clear and OUCH!)
1/2/15 - Began stimming for IVF #2
****All Welcome!****
We are Mommas to four fur babies - 3 dogs and 1 cat.
Me: 30 DW (aka C): 29
Together since 2/15/11 ~ Legally married in NY on 9/29/12
***CP mentioned***
We've been working on baby #1 since July 2013 using Open ID donor sperm. 8 IUI attempts with 5 actual IUIs and one chemical pregnancy. We have one fresh IVF cycle under our belts as well as a FET. I have endometriosis and a uterine septum that was corrected via surgery in November 2013.
11/14/14 - Second HSG shows that tubes are still clear and ute is looking good.
12/6/14 - Started BCPs in prep for IVF #2
12/22/14 - Saline u/s and endometrial scratch (All was clear and OUCH!)
1/2/15 - Began stimming for IVF #2
****All Welcome!****
We are Mommas to four fur babies - 3 dogs and 1 cat.
Ovidrel trigger last night. Will go for IUI #3 tomorrow morning. Best of luck to everyone in their TWW.
Married in September 2010, started TTC journey November 2012
Me-
7 IUI- 2 CP- 2 BFN
RPL blood work 12/27, showed a balance translocation in chromosome 11;22
Spouse-
PCOS 4 IUI-4 BFN
New Plan: Reciprocal IVF, me as carrier wife's eggs. Just went through insurance and received partial approval, so my part will go through my IVF benefits and wife's part will be out of pocket. Now just finalizing finance plans to cover the oop costs. Doctors office is in process of moving to a new building so there are no IVF start ups until March/April 2015.
Ordered a concept2 rower! It's on our porch right now waiting for me! Very excited.
Queer coupled and having a BABY with the love of my life! Love my life and wouldn't have it any other way!
First IUI 1/22/2013 BFN: 2/7/2013, Second IUI 2/21/2013 BFN: 3/9/2013, Third IUI 4/23/2013 BFN: 5/8/2013, Fourth IUI 5/24/2013 BFN: 6/7/2013, Fifth IUI 6/24/2013 BFN: 7/8/2013
C began IUI's
7/23/2013 C's first IUI BFN, 8/21/2013 C's second IUI BFN , Took a break in September and October, 11/05/2013 C's 3rd IUI (TWW...we meet again...) BFN, Took off the month to switch to an RE. 01/01/2014 C's 4th IUI...BFP!!!!!!!! Beta #1- 17, Beta #2- 34, Beta #3-140.... 6W Ultra-Sound Reveals nothing in Gestation Sack... Natural M/C at 7W, 2/3/2014
03/21/2014 IUI #10...BFP!!! Beta #1- 48, Beta #2- 416, Beta #3- 1018. GROW BABY GROW!!!
1st Ultrasound 4/22/2014 Baby Squints is PERFECT! Measuring at 6w2d with a heartbeat of 129. EDD: 12/12/14.
Ultrasound at 18 weeks on 7/14/2014. Baby is healthy and growing just as she should!
Check out my blog at: http://journeytoparenthoodandmakingmilk.blogspot.com/
CageyMack
37, married to my favorite person in the world, DW! One darling surfer-girl (12) and one darling, sweet boy born 3/16/13.
5/2013 Started TTC #3, DW's turn: 5/2013: Diagnostics (shg) and surgery (polyp rem.) for best chances. July-Oct: IUI # 1-4, medicated, monitored, triggered. All BFN. IVF in Jan May. Sheesh. Whoop! IVF#1 cycle started 4/2/14. 5/1: 19 eggs retrieved, 8 matured, ICSI'd. 4 fertilized. Only 2 to transfer/freeze stage. 5/6: Two embryos transferred. 5/15: Beta #1 9dp5dt is 134! BFP! 5/19: Beta #2 13dp5dt is 672! B'erFP! 5/21: Beta #3 15dp5dt is 1853. Yay!
"Things separate from their stories have no meaning. They are only shapes. Of a certain size and color. A certain weight. When their meaning has become lost to us they no longer have even a name. The story on the other hand can never be lost from its place in the world for it is that place.” ― Cormac McCarthy, The Crossing
Me: 30 DW (aka C): 29
Together since 2/15/11 ~ Legally married in NY on 9/29/12
***CP mentioned***
We've been working on baby #1 since July 2013 using Open ID donor sperm. 8 IUI attempts with 5 actual IUIs and one chemical pregnancy. We have one fresh IVF cycle under our belts as well as a FET. I have endometriosis and a uterine septum that was corrected via surgery in November 2013.
11/14/14 - Second HSG shows that tubes are still clear and ute is looking good.
12/6/14 - Started BCPs in prep for IVF #2
12/22/14 - Saline u/s and endometrial scratch (All was clear and OUCH!)
1/2/15 - Began stimming for IVF #2
****All Welcome!****
We are Mommas to four fur babies - 3 dogs and 1 cat.
Best thing about last weekend was DW taking the week old ducklings on a duck parade around the dinning room table.