Sexy time and BFing

BootsOrHearts · March 2014

LO is 4 months old, born via csection. Every time DH and I have attempted sex since baby was born it has hurt really bad and we had to stop.

My doctor checked everything and said it's probably just dryness. She said estrogen levels are low while BFing and that causes dryness and therefore pain. We have tried lube and that still doesn't help.

Anyone have similar issues?

MJM3108 · March 2014

@ncchnat‌ hit the nail right on the head, so to speak. Slow and steady, lots of foreplay, and basically enough lube to fill a baby pool! It will get better with time.

KJsbabe · March 2014

I've been there! Lol I had a c/s too and when my OB looked up in there he said it looked very dry. I'm not going to lie, sex was bad for a really long time. Every time we tried it felt like I was being stabbed with 1000 needles, or DH was suddenly made of barbed wire. All the lube in the world didn't make a difference.

For me, things didn't improve until I got my first PP AF. And that was only after I weaned down to BFing 3x a day at 17 months. Thankfully, now things are back to normal.

ProfessorPedals825 · March 2014

Yes, I really remember wondering if the pain would ever stop or I would always have to deal with it. It did stop when I stopped pumping. Foreplay is a must and taking things slow at first. Now that I'm past that part of it, it's just "Hurry, let's do this the baby's asleep" LOL!

BootsOrHearts · March 2014

KJsbabe said:

I've been there! Lol I had a c/s too and when my OB looked up in there he said it looked very dry. I'm not going to lie, sex was bad for a really long time. Every time we tried it felt like I was being stabbed with 1000 needles, or DH was suddenly made of barbed wire. All the lube in the world didn't make a difference. For me, things didn't improve until I got my first PP AF. And that was only after I weaned down to BFing 3x a day at 17 months. Thankfully, now things are back to normal.

This is what I'm afraid of. Though, we plan to wean in 2-3 months so I guess that's not the end of the world. It's possible that even just going down to far fewer pumping sessions a day will get my cycles (and natural lube!) going again. I might try that first vs. completely weaning. My RE wants me totally weaned before starting our FET but I've read that it's safe to keep BFing with those meds so we'll see. That's probably a whole separate post.

BootsOrHearts · March 2014

mkc5869 said:

What they said. @dmalone1024 had a good point about the warming lube. Bad, bad idea. I always liked it before but for some reason after having M there was a 4 alarm fire in my vag.

I had a planned CS also so never had any "trauma" but sex was still very uncomfortable. We started out with just hand stuff and eventually got back to sex but it was really uncomfortable for a long time. In fact, I didn't start really enjoying sex again until after AF came back and we were pretty much done with breastfeeding (9-10 months PP). Once she came back we were like freaking bunnies. I couldn't get enough. I blame it all on my hormones.

This made me LOL. I'm sure it wasn't funny at the time though!

kbhaynes · March 2014

I didn't have a c-section, but once we started trying to have sexy time we had to stop. It hurt so bad, and I did have dryness as well. It honestly took me a good 6 months to start enjoying it again. Like a PP said, lots of lube and lots of foreplay. We love the "just like me" lube from Pure Romance. Great stuff.

daisy19782011 · March 2014

mkc5869 said:

BootsOrHearts said:

mkc5869 said:

What they said. @dmalone1024 had a good point about the warming lube. Bad, bad idea. I always liked it before but for some reason after having M there was a 4 alarm fire in my vag.

I had a planned CS also so never had any "trauma" but sex was still very uncomfortable. We started out with just hand stuff and eventually got back to sex but it was really uncomfortable for a long time. In fact, I didn't start really enjoying sex again until after AF came back and we were pretty much done with breastfeeding (9-10 months PP). Once she came back we were like freaking bunnies. I couldn't get enough. I blame it all on my hormones.

This made me LOL. I'm sure it wasn't funny at the time though!

My husband thought it was pretty funny and it's hilarious looking back. I was dancing around the bathroom trying to figure out how to make it stop. I just remember thinking that I wish I had a squirt bottle so I could rinse it out. I will NEVER use that again.

WE had a period of TTA before we had the girls and used a fire and ice condom---MH thought a pleasure variety pack was a GOOD idea (WRONG)...it was awful,,,,nothing all the way up there should be VERY hot or VERY cold. yuck! haha!

Aubs0009 · March 2014

It is tough getting back into the swing of it. It hurts less and less each time. Just stick with it, it will get better!!

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