Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
StacyLH24
member
Re: TTC Check-In
QOTW: C got a new job and it is really helping our income and giving us something to be positive about!
Queer coupled and having a BABY with the love of my life! Love my life and wouldn't have it any other way!
First IUI 1/22/2013 BFN: 2/7/2013, Second IUI 2/21/2013 BFN: 3/9/2013, Third IUI 4/23/2013 BFN: 5/8/2013, Fourth IUI 5/24/2013 BFN: 6/7/2013, Fifth IUI 6/24/2013 BFN: 7/8/2013
C began IUI's
7/23/2013 C's first IUI BFN, 8/21/2013 C's second IUI BFN , Took a break in September and October, 11/05/2013 C's 3rd IUI (TWW...we meet again...) BFN, Took off the month to switch to an RE. 01/01/2014 C's 4th IUI...BFP!!!!!!!! Beta #1- 17, Beta #2- 34, Beta #3-140.... 6W Ultra-Sound Reveals nothing in Gestation Sack... Natural M/C at 7W, 2/3/2014
03/21/2014 IUI #10...BFP!!! Beta #1- 48, Beta #2- 416, Beta #3- 1018. GROW BABY GROW!!!
1st Ultrasound 4/22/2014 Baby Squints is PERFECT! Measuring at 6w2d with a heartbeat of 129. EDD: 12/12/14.
Ultrasound at 18 weeks on 7/14/2014. Baby is healthy and growing just as she should!
Check out my blog at: http://journeytoparenthoodandmakingmilk.blogspot.com/
QOTW: I was able to reconnect with an old friend over the weekend. We had a great time and I'm so happy we were able to spend time together.
Me: 30 DW (aka C): 29
Together since 2/15/11 ~ Legally married in NY on 9/29/12
***CP mentioned***
We've been working on baby #1 since July 2013 using Open ID donor sperm. 8 IUI attempts with 5 actual IUIs and one chemical pregnancy. We have one fresh IVF cycle under our belts as well as a FET. I have endometriosis and a uterine septum that was corrected via surgery in November 2013.
11/14/14 - Second HSG shows that tubes are still clear and ute is looking good.
12/6/14 - Started BCPs in prep for IVF #2
12/22/14 - Saline u/s and endometrial scratch (All was clear and OUCH!)
1/2/15 - Began stimming for IVF #2
****All Welcome!****
We are Mommas to four fur babies - 3 dogs and 1 cat.
Married in September 2010, started TTC journey November 2012
Me-
7 IUI- 2 CP- 2 BFN
RPL blood work 12/27, showed a balance translocation in chromosome 11;22
Spouse-
PCOS 4 IUI-4 BFN
New Plan: Reciprocal IVF, me as carrier wife's eggs. Just went through insurance and received partial approval, so my part will go through my IVF benefits and wife's part will be out of pocket. Now just finalizing finance plans to cover the oop costs. Doctors office is in process of moving to a new building so there are no IVF start ups until March/April 2015.
I'm just waiting for AF right now to decide if this cycle will be a "go" or not... depends on how much it'll interfere with my schedule at work since I have so much going on this month. I am in the mindset that I really, really want to make it happen. I know this sounds terrible, but I'd be so excited to have a baby in December - it would get C and I out of the holidays! Last year was a fun but exhausting marathon of 5 Christmas celebrations back-to-back. We celebrated in 3 different states. Being 9 months pregnant and/or having a very newly newborn in tow = Christmas warm and cozy at home with visitors so we won't have to leave.
Anyhoo... next plan is Femara and Follistim with IUI. I suppose we're going to have to learn how to give me shots in the belly. If it gets me closer to having a kid, I'm all for it!
I started my low-carb diet too. Not sure if it'll do anything but hey, it can't hurt! I'd hop back on the ol' treadmill tonight but I've come down with a bit of a cold and I need to rest so I can recover. I've got a lot going on these next few weeks and I need my head in the game.
GTKY: My good friends are coming over this weekend!!! They just got engaged
I'm super happy for them and can't wait to hear the story. Plus my friend T grills like a champ and she offered to make us dinner. Sadly, it may rain so I'm going to make pollo poblano which was a big hit with them last time I made it. Hooray for seeing friends! I feel like we've been holed up for so long with this dreadful winter. It'll be good to see people again.
I'm 1 dpiui. The IUI yesterday went pretty smoothly. A little painful but no cramping at all, which was great. My plan this cycle has been to keep my expectations as low as possible and not focus on the TWW at all. My goal is to forget how many dpiui I am
We'll see how it goes. I haven't decided if being on TB will help distract me or keep me too focused on the TWW, so I'll either be on here a ton or not at all, depending on my thinking that day.
QOTW: So this is small, but was some good news that came in a rough patch: we're getting a huge refund this year! Not quite sure why we're getting back so much more this year. This is our first year filing married, but our accountant said we would have owed more last year if we had filed married then, so I fully expected to get less back or owe this time.
Me: 28 DW: 28
Together since 5/30/02. Married since 8/31/08
IUI#1 - 12/13/13 = BFN
IUI#2 - 1/22/14 = BFN
IUI#3 - 2/21/14 = BFN
IUI#4 - 3/23/14
My niece and nephew are coming to spend spring break with us and this time they are actually going to bring spending money which is BIG news!
@odduck1979 - How many dpo are you?
@kristi&p - I hope all goes well for your SO's IUI. Enjoy Florida! We had a great time when we were there two weeks ago!
@firstcomeslove2013 - FX that this is it for you both in the TTC game! I will be anxiously awaiting a BFP announcement.
@rkbo - FX you have a BFP to announce soon as well. Only a few more days.
@CrazyAunt84 - I'm sorry that it looks like a BFN. A BFN is never easy.
@wishiwaspreggo - I think you'll do fine with the shots. You'll be surprised how easy and pretty painless they are.
Me: 30 DW (aka C): 29
Together since 2/15/11 ~ Legally married in NY on 9/29/12
***CP mentioned***
We've been working on baby #1 since July 2013 using Open ID donor sperm. 8 IUI attempts with 5 actual IUIs and one chemical pregnancy. We have one fresh IVF cycle under our belts as well as a FET. I have endometriosis and a uterine septum that was corrected via surgery in November 2013.
11/14/14 - Second HSG shows that tubes are still clear and ute is looking good.
12/6/14 - Started BCPs in prep for IVF #2
12/22/14 - Saline u/s and endometrial scratch (All was clear and OUCH!)
1/2/15 - Began stimming for IVF #2
****All Welcome!****
We are Mommas to four fur babies - 3 dogs and 1 cat.
Me: 30 DW (aka C): 29
Together since 2/15/11 ~ Legally married in NY on 9/29/12
***CP mentioned***
We've been working on baby #1 since July 2013 using Open ID donor sperm. 8 IUI attempts with 5 actual IUIs and one chemical pregnancy. We have one fresh IVF cycle under our belts as well as a FET. I have endometriosis and a uterine septum that was corrected via surgery in November 2013.
11/14/14 - Second HSG shows that tubes are still clear and ute is looking good.
12/6/14 - Started BCPs in prep for IVF #2
12/22/14 - Saline u/s and endometrial scratch (All was clear and OUCH!)
1/2/15 - Began stimming for IVF #2
****All Welcome!****
We are Mommas to four fur babies - 3 dogs and 1 cat.
Me: 30 DW (aka C): 29
Together since 2/15/11 ~ Legally married in NY on 9/29/12
***CP mentioned***
We've been working on baby #1 since July 2013 using Open ID donor sperm. 8 IUI attempts with 5 actual IUIs and one chemical pregnancy. We have one fresh IVF cycle under our belts as well as a FET. I have endometriosis and a uterine septum that was corrected via surgery in November 2013.
11/14/14 - Second HSG shows that tubes are still clear and ute is looking good.
12/6/14 - Started BCPs in prep for IVF #2
12/22/14 - Saline u/s and endometrial scratch (All was clear and OUCH!)
1/2/15 - Began stimming for IVF #2
****All Welcome!****
We are Mommas to four fur babies - 3 dogs and 1 cat.
BFP TTC #1 May 1997
Mathilda Winifred "Tilde" born 3 February 1998
TTC #2 with DW (IUI with DS) (DW carrying) May 2005 - December 2005
TTC #2 with DW (IVF with DS) (DW carrying) January 2006 - May 2006
BFP TTC #2 May 2006
Nova Kathrine born 9 November 2006
Nova finally became legally mine 1 January 2009
Married DW 2 January 2009
TTC #3 with DW (Surrogacy with DE) March 2014 - ????
Me: 30 DW (aka C): 29
Together since 2/15/11 ~ Legally married in NY on 9/29/12
***CP mentioned***
We've been working on baby #1 since July 2013 using Open ID donor sperm. 8 IUI attempts with 5 actual IUIs and one chemical pregnancy. We have one fresh IVF cycle under our belts as well as a FET. I have endometriosis and a uterine septum that was corrected via surgery in November 2013.
11/14/14 - Second HSG shows that tubes are still clear and ute is looking good.
12/6/14 - Started BCPs in prep for IVF #2
12/22/14 - Saline u/s and endometrial scratch (All was clear and OUCH!)
1/2/15 - Began stimming for IVF #2
****All Welcome!****
We are Mommas to four fur babies - 3 dogs and 1 cat.
Together 11 years ~ Married 4 years
IUI #3 - April 2014 - Monitored, 100mg Clomid CD1-5. Ovidrel w/ one 24mm follicle on CD13, back-to-back IUI w/ donor sperm CD14-15... BFP on 5/1/14 ... EDD: 1/10/15
Me: 30 DW (aka C): 29
Together since 2/15/11 ~ Legally married in NY on 9/29/12
***CP mentioned***
We've been working on baby #1 since July 2013 using Open ID donor sperm. 8 IUI attempts with 5 actual IUIs and one chemical pregnancy. We have one fresh IVF cycle under our belts as well as a FET. I have endometriosis and a uterine septum that was corrected via surgery in November 2013.
11/14/14 - Second HSG shows that tubes are still clear and ute is looking good.
12/6/14 - Started BCPs in prep for IVF #2
12/22/14 - Saline u/s and endometrial scratch (All was clear and OUCH!)
1/2/15 - Began stimming for IVF #2
****All Welcome!****
We are Mommas to four fur babies - 3 dogs and 1 cat.
CageyMack
37, married to my favorite person in the world, DW! One darling surfer-girl (12) and one darling, sweet boy born 3/16/13.
5/2013 Started TTC #3, DW's turn: 5/2013: Diagnostics (shg) and surgery (polyp rem.) for best chances. July-Oct: IUI # 1-4, medicated, monitored, triggered. All BFN. IVF in Jan May. Sheesh. Whoop! IVF#1 cycle started 4/2/14. 5/1: 19 eggs retrieved, 8 matured, ICSI'd. 4 fertilized. Only 2 to transfer/freeze stage. 5/6: Two embryos transferred. 5/15: Beta #1 9dp5dt is 134! BFP! 5/19: Beta #2 13dp5dt is 672! B'erFP! 5/21: Beta #3 15dp5dt is 1853. Yay!
"Things separate from their stories have no meaning. They are only shapes. Of a certain size and color. A certain weight. When their meaning has become lost to us they no longer have even a name. The story on the other hand can never be lost from its place in the world for it is that place.” ― Cormac McCarthy, The Crossing