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Babies: 3 - 6 Months
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Let's talk about sex...

gnrkrystle1gnrkrystle1 member
in Babies: 3 - 6 Months
Seriously though, I have absolutely no interest, whatsoever, in sex right now. I have a 2 year old, and my newest little addition is just over 3 months old. My husband is saint. He do obviously wants to have sex, and I shut it down before he can even ask. I had a very good sex drive before baby number 2. Sure, I had the typical hormonal drop in drive after the first baby was born, but I got it back. Now, honestly, even when my husband kisses me, I'm like "Please, go away." Does anyone have any advice or any solutions that worked for them in getting their sex drive back? I really do miss it! 

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Re: Let's talk about sex...

  • BoyOhBoysBoyOhBoys member
    I am in the same boat but I don't miss it. I sure don't want to lose my husband so I will have to eventually.
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  • StephandMatt2012StephandMatt2012 member
    Lube and wine, does it every time :)
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  • HisChamaoleGirlHisChamaoleGirl member
    ugh! In my scenario I am the one who wants to but DH isn't interested. I am guessing it has to do with his new promotion which means added stress and hours, but this dry spell is getting a bit ridiculous.

    BFP #1 11/07/2012 EDD 07/09/2013 M/C 11/22/2012

    BFP #2 02/05/2013 EDD 09/19/2013 Arrived via c-section 09/27/2013

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  • gnrkrystle1gnrkrystle1 member
    I do not have that problem (husband not wanting it) but I can offer my ideas. :) Perhaps he's scared? Is this your first baby? I know my husband was treating me like a glass doll during sex after my first born. I was finally like, "Look, I'm not going to break. It doesn't work like that!" haha Stress and exhaustion could be it too. I know that I'm way too tired to even consider sex. If i did it now, it would be like a chore, and I don't want to ever sleep with my husband out of obligation because it will taint it, I think. 

    Perhaps wine might do the trick though. :) 

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  • look1nbeyondlook1nbeyond member
    I'm with the scared comments. Its my first and I had to be cut ALL the way.... Getting back into it was nerve racking. Luckily my hubby is a saint. He was just as scared as I was. We just did it in stages. Not going all the way the first few times. Just taking it slow, until I felt it started to get more comfortable. 
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  • afsalinasafsalinas member
    Mine came back when I stopped BF-ing.
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    Started TTC June 2011Cycles #1-10 = BFNCycle #11: 100 mg Clomid + TI =BFNReferred to RE March 2012HSG all clear, FSH = 13, Prolactin = 28, S/A = greatApril 2012 MRI to check for brain tumor due to elevated Prolactin = clearJune 2012 Hysteroscopy to remove uterine polyps and partial septateJuly 2012 IUI #1 7/7/12 = BFNAugust 2012 IUI #2.1 Cancelled due to early/missed ovulation = BFNSeptember 2012 Forced break due to one huge cyst October 2012 IUI #2.2 = BFNNovember 2012 Begin BCPs for IVF #1December 2012 IVF #1 = Delayed due to cyst. Start stims 12/22January 2013 ER: 1/2, 14R, 10M, 9FET: 1/7 Transferred 1 "Perfect" blast! 4 frosties!Beta #1: 99 BFP! #2: 227 #3: 584 #4: 3,020Baby Boy born September 25, 2013

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  • RMarie88RMarie88 member
    gnrkrystle1 said:
    Seriously though, I have absolutely no interest, whatsoever, in sex right now. I have a 2 year old, and my newest little addition is just over 3 months old. My husband is saint. He do obviously wants to have sex, and I shut it down before he can even ask. I had a very good sex drive before baby number 2. Sure, I had the typical hormonal drop in drive after the first baby was born, but I got it back. Now, honestly, even when my husband kisses me, I'm like "Please, go away." Does anyone have any advice or any solutions that worked for them in getting their sex drive back? I really do miss it! 
    I'm having the same problems. I'm blaming my PPD/PPA and my extremely low self-esteem. I'm disgusted by my PP body. I can't even look at myself naked so I don't see how DH could even want to touch me. He does though...and I can't get over myself. *sigh* I dunno what to do.
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  • Stephanie2167Stephanie2167 member
    I have a 3 year old and 3 month old twins. I was put on pelvic rest at 20 weeks. We've done it 3x since the babies were born. Seriously, I'd rather be sleeping but my poor husband.


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  • hawtness21hawtness21 member
    I went to my ob/gyn to ask if I can get my hormones checked because of this. She suggested I try to have more sex with my husband that will make me want it more. My problem is majority of the time when he initiates I'm usually in the middle of housework or I'm going to bed because I'm exhausted. Use lube and take it slow. Foreplay works well too.
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  • gnrkrystle1gnrkrystle1 member
    Thanks guys. I'm glad I'm not alone. So far it's been kind of, "close your eyes and think of England" but I'm hoping to get the drive back. 

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  • VPGIRL06VPGIRL06 member
    It's been a year and i JUST got it back.  i had a csection, and I still use lube and some wine.  it makes us feel closer, even if I'm never in the mood.
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  • Mummyisaac+1Mummyisaac+1 member
    I'm in the same boat. My husband and I have only DTD once in almost a year. He really wants to but its the last thing I want to be doing at the moment. I keep thinking we should just to keep him happy but its really difficult to relax and get on with it when I don't really want to. 

    I'm hoping that I'll eventually get some sort of sex drive but I'm not holding my breath!
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  • gnrkrystle1gnrkrystle1 member
    This is, honestly, a silly quirk of biology. I mean, what good does it do for us to have one or two kids and then never want to have sex again?!?!? What's up with that? :P 

    I'm trying to be a trooper. Lube and Wine it is. I'm just crossing my fingers that it will come naturally eventually. 

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  • MeggabaeeMeggabaee member
    I have had this same problem. I am glad I am not alone...I have thought maybe I should call my OB because something is wrong. I assumed it was just the stress and from being tired. We have done it 2 times since LO was born. She is about 6 months and honestly the only time I'm in the mood is with a drink or two. Hopefully my drive comes back someday!
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  • MrsParker843MrsParker843 member
    Same boat... It is definitely nice to hear that it is somewhat normal. I had a mini mommy makeover last week- basically just got my hair done but came home and actually got "dressed" and did my makeup and I felt like a million bucks. Maybe the trick is taking some time for ourselves (: 
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