Intro and Prepping for a Preemie

Xath · March 2014

***loss mentioned***

Hello all. I'm popping over here from the May 14 board because it looks increasingly likely that my son will be joining us early. A little history on me:

My first son was born via a planned cesarean because he was breech at 39 weeks. I never had any labor symptoms; never even experienced a contraction for the whole pregnancy. Aside from him being breech for the last 3 months, it was fairly routine.

My pregnancy with my daughter was fairly normal. At our anatomy scan we discovered that she had slightly enlarged kidneys and saw a MFM until her body caught up and they went back to normal size range. At 31 weeks, I started contracting regularly and was put on nifedipine. We gradually increased the dosage over the next few weeks up to the max, and I had some L&D visits with terbutaline injections. At 35w6d, the contractions were less than 2 minutes apart and I was dialating, so they decided to deliver via cesarean. As they opened me up on the operating table, they realized that my uterus was rupturing along the previous cesarean scar. Fortunately they were already prepped, so they were able to save both of us and the uterus. Eleanor was born 7lbs0oz and scored very well on her apgars, but they sent her to the NICU as a precaution because she was having a little trouble breathing on her own. The doctors told us that she was going to do amazingly in the NICU, and she started off very well. In the first 24 hours, they were able to lower her O2 content to normal, and they started to reduce the pressure on her ventilator. I couldn't go see her the night she was born (I got to hold her in the PACU, but not after), but I did get to go down several times the next day to visit her. That night, I went to see her at 2am and they wouldn't let me into the NICU. After some time they came out to let me know that something had happened and they were trying to resuscitate her. It turns out she had a double pneumothoraces, which somehow caused her heart to stop, and even though they had her lungs reinflated in seconds, they were never able to get her heart started again. She passed away after 28 hours of life.

We were very lucky to get pregnant with our third child, and are expecting another little boy due May 15. This pregnancy started off fairly uneventfully, but we took plenty of precautions. I've been on P17 shots since 16 weeks. At 24 weeks, I had contractions 5-6 minutes apart and went to L&D. They were able to slow the contractions (caused by infection) and put me on antibiotics and procardia. Even after the infection was gone, the contractions have continued, and I'm now up to the maximum daily dosage of procardia. I went in last week for my betamethasone shots. But now nothing seems to be helping the contractions. In addition, at my growth scan this week, the MFM discovered that my placenta is showing premature aging/calcification. Now my doctor is hoping to get me to at least 34 weeks. He says that will give us a very healthy baby with good chances, but I'm not confident in that, given that our daughter was born nearly 2 weeks after and still died. So I'm trying to prepare myself for an extended NICU stay, but I'm not really sure what to do. I'm still hoping with the addition of bedrest (starting this week) we'll be able to push further than 34, but I'd appreciate any words of wisdom/advice from those of you who have experience.

My H and I did learn a few lessons from our short NICU stay last time, and this is what we have so far:

We purchased tablets with cameras so that we can Skype from my recovery room to the NICU if I can't be down there with him, and have back-up capability on our phones.
We're planning on having someone from our family with him at all times, so if something happens to him he's not alone.
We've contacted our newborn photographer, who said if he's born early she'll come to the hospital and do an extra session with all of us so that we have good pictures of our family just in case.

But these are mostly post-loss reactionary preparations. I'm not really sure what I'll need to do if he's in the NICU for an extended period of time. I'm starting by reading the Preemie Resource Blog from the top of the board. If you have any other advice to share, I'd appreciate it.

Tylynngrace · March 2014

I'm so sorry for everything you've been through, it can't be easy. Your fears are justified. I'm also sorry that you'll most likely be joining us but always welcoming a new mommy and baby.

I think having pictures taken right away is a great idea and I wish I would've done that as well! I don't have much advice because I'm still trying to wrap my head around how I did it. I will say that I hope you can make it to 34 weeks and have a healthy baby! I'll be sending thoughts and prayers your way.

Xath · March 2014

@Cassidy & Peter‌ I'm glad your son is doing well in the NICU and hope he continues to improve and grow.

rascus15 · March 2014

So sorry for your loss. Our LO was just released Monday from a 2 week 6 day NICU stay. I had a rough pregnancy with several complications and had a placental abrubruption at 10:30 pm when I was 32w 4days and he was delivered 10:59 am the following day. I received the steroid shot to improve his lungs but did not have it on board long enough to benefit him. He spent 3 days in an isolette with an oxygen canula. Then he spent a few more days in the isolette without oxygen one of those days with a bili light. He was moved to a crib and we spent the remainder of the stay trying to improve his eating. I guess the point is that no one wants a little one in the NICU, but what we learned was to take one day at a time, one test at a time, and celebrate each milestone. I agree with Cassidy and Peter's list. I will also add that if you have trouble getting a good milk supply, use things like fenugreek, mother's milk tea, and eating oatmeal to boost production.

MinaE01 · March 2014

Hi from a fellow May14 Mom!

I am so sorry for the loss of little Eleanor. I hope the bed rest helps and you get beyond 34 weeks. This board is an excellent resource. These ladies are so knowledgeable. Cassidy covered it all! I just want to add that taking care of yourself and DS are just as important as visiting LO in the NICU. If you do end up in the NICU, don't beat yourself up if you can't be there as much as you would like. Of course you want to be there for your new baby, but it's ok to not be there all day long. I felt a lot of guilt at the time, but here I am 17 months later wishing I wouldn't have been so hard on myself back then!

I'll be thinking of you. Keep us posted.

direy25 · March 2014

These ladies have it covered, their advice is amazing so I really don't have much to add. I'm so very sorry for your loss. I hope you cam make it past 34 weeks, but ditto about 30+ weekers doing amazingly well. My LO was born at 27&3, we had an uneventful 68 day NICU stay and he's now a happy & healthy 9 month old.
Good luck to you!

AmandaFaith · March 2014

I am so terribly sorry to hear about your previous loss and that you are now facing a NICU stay. DH and I lost our first son when I was 19 weeks pregnant (stillbirth) and our b/g twins recently arrived on January 29th at only 25 weeks. Having also lost a child before, I know how incredibly scary it is to find yourself in a situation such as this, but please try to take some comfort in the fact that every pregnancy and every baby is unique. As others have mentioned, babies delivered at 30+ weeks tend to much better than those delivered before. My twins are doing okay, but each day has it's fair share of ups and downs. The NICU is very much a roller coaster ride, but you have to remember to just take each day and each challenge as they come. It sounds like you are doing an awesome job with attempting to prepare yourself for the unknown of what lies ahead. Stay strong and pray for the best. That's truthfully all we can really do.

Xath · March 2014

Thank you all for the warm welcome. I didn't think when I posted, but I'm sorry if my initial post was insensitive to those of you who have faced even earlier deliveries. I'm very grateful for the support I've already received, and I'm glad to have this community. I'm looking forward watching all of your LOs get stronger too.

direy25 · March 2014

Don't ever feel like you're being insensitive about something like that! Everyone's journey is different and being a preemie parent is difficult no matter how early your LO is born!

AmandaFaith · March 2014

direy25 said:
Don't ever feel like you're being insensitive about something like that! Everyone's journey is different and being a preemie parent is difficult no matter how early your LO is born!

I second this!

e74 · March 2014

Welcome! I'm sorry for your loss and hope that you make it to full term... If not, I found this board to be very welcoming!

Allibob · March 2014

Welcome Gertie! I'm new here myself, so I don't have a lot of advice to offer. Since you also have a child at home, the hardest part for me has been dividing my time between the hospital, quality time with my daughter at home, pumping, and sleep. It seems Iike I come up short for all 4 every day. I've had to give up some hospital time & am trying to be ok with that. I'm glad you have a rotating schedule so that someone can be with your son when you need a break to take care of yourself or be with your oldest. However, my NICU's policy is that no visitors are allowed without a parent present. Just something to look into. I hope you're able to keep gestating a long long time!

ama7165 · March 2014

I am also new to all of this as well. I definitely agree with trying to not to feel guilty about not being there all the time. I felt like I needed to be in the nicu every second and it just wore me down and I wasn't taking care of myself. Eat and drink lots of fluids, you will need it for pumping. I also got really frustrated waiting for my milk to come in, I would pump nothing. Being out of control of so much i was really hard on myself when pumping wasn't going well because I felt like that was the only thing I was able to provide for my child. I agree with the journal...it feels really good to document progress. Crying really does help sometimes. I also found that it was and is hard for me to see anyone pregnant and sometimes even seeing healthy newborns. I know it's irrational, but I keep thinking how I should still be pregnant so it's hard, but getting better. Also at the nicu visitors were only allowed if one parent was there, so be sure to check on that. Accept help. Realize you can't do it all. I have learned to not turn down any help from cleaning, cooking meals, dog sitting, etc. It really has taken alot of stress off me. Good luck, my thoughts and prayers are with you.

Want a personalized experience?

Intro and Prepping for a Preemie

Re: Intro and Prepping for a Preemie

Choose Another Board

Search Boards