STM+: The 2nd Night Crash?

spacepotatoes · March 2014

At my pre-admission clinic this past week, the nurse warned me about this. She said that on the first night after birth, babies tend to sleep fairly well but by the second night, they've realized they're in foreign territory and tend to freak out. She said to be prepared for a possible rough second night. Have you experienced this? Any tricks up my sleeve I can be prepared with to handle it? Is it just a trial-by-fire sort of thing? It's making me a little nervous, especially since I'll be sharing the room with another mom and baby at that point.

chknma · March 2014

I felt this way but I also think it depends on your labor and delivery time.

I woke up around 6 am the day I was being admitted for my induction (scheduled for admission at 5pm) because i was so excited. The cervadil kicked me right into labor so I was up all night and delivered DD just before 6 am. Then a day of being in awe of my newborn and visitors. We both slept reasonably well that night. I sent DH home the second night and called him in a postpartum meltdown at 11 pm because baby was already up a lot more and the exhaustion caught up with me.

I think this time we will have blocks of no visitors in hopes of getting some naps in and just wing it from there.

ksyknelvr73 · March 2014

This happened to me, it was rough. The first night was actually pretty decent, the 2nd night he cried almost the entire night. I barely got any sleep. He was also cluster feeding the whole time. I turned down having any visitors that next day bc of it. I think it was a combo of what your nurse said, BFing, and he was circ'ed that morning.

tjkdlhb · March 2014

DD did this. I didn't realize it had a name, but I remember the nurse coming in and getting mad at DH (who had just been up for hours) because he was lying down and I was nursing DD. DH felt really bad about it (he's an amazing dad and has been from the start) and still talks about it. I just remember that night being particularly rough in terms of DD waking a lot and both of us being really tired. It was definitely helpful having DH there. If that's at all possible.

Also, something to keep in mind is on the fourth day I had a huge breakdown (baby blues, I guess it was). It only lasted a day or so in my case, but it was intense. It was a combination of things (worrying about DH driving while overtired, being in the hospital longer than expected. etc), but the main reason was hormonal I think. Just to give you a heads up. I cried for most of that day.

spacepotatoes · March 2014

MK1013 said:

But let me tell ya, I certainly crashed once we were permanently home (DS was readmitted after 1 night of being home due to high bilirubin levels). I think I was just so emotionally drained that I basically just hit a wall. Still, he was the average every 2-3 hour feedings!

I've been anticipating my own hormone crash since I've heard that one was coming, but the baby crashing was news to me. So much to look forward to

Thanks for sharing your experiences so far!

princesscays · March 2014

The nurses warned us about it, but didn't notice anything. She was also a baby that hardly ever cried so I'm sure I've got it coming to me this time.

Chellbell20 · March 2014

This happened to us. DD was born around 2am and was pretty calm the whole rest of the night and day. But the following night she was cluster feeding all night long. Thankfully we went home early the next day and were able to relax there.

sammy.k · March 2014

We used the nursery. They would bring DS in to feed but would bring him back to the nursery in the middle of the night. Call me a bad mom, but I had a super rough delivery and needed the rest.

jjones59 · March 2014

My LO was a good sleeper from the get go at night, she still doesn't sleep well during the day. She was born at 7:52 pm so the first night I didn't sleep well but the second night I tried too.

rainydayluck · March 2014

I think the sleepy newborn phase stays for like 2 weeks, then it goes downhill. Then, once you are in a good swing of things, the dreaded 4 month wakeful hits. It's more when they start rolling and waking themselves up. That was the worse stage ever! I laugh (internally) at new parents who have babies younger than 4 months and are bragging about how the sleep thing isn't so bad.

mrspopsicle · March 2014

Yep. This happened for us. I was glad I had read about it somewhere (Lucies list maybe?). She pretty much wanted to cluster feed all night.

typeset · March 2014

Whenever he was inconsolable at night during the early days, we'd hit the reset button. We'd start the whole routine over. Offer the breast, burp, change, fresh jammies, reswaddle, and back in the crib. Worked a good bit of the time. If he was uncomfortable it solved whatever was making him so and the process wore him down enough to rest. Gave us something to do as well rather than feel exhausted and helpless.

ns1 · March 2014

I didn't know it was a thing, but reading our post made me realize that's probably what went on with DD that second night. I thought it was just a fluke or that I didn't realize she was wet soon enough or something, but yeah, the second night she was up and screaming inconsolably a lot. Not fun. I don't have any real advice other than, it passes! I think just knowing to expect it though and that it's common will probably help.

chillypenguin · March 2014

My hospital gave out a handout on this as a warning. We decided to ask to be discharged a day early because we just wanted to be at home, so I was really freaked out because it was our first night at home. Maybe I just got lucky, but the second night was not bad. I'm sure I will pay for it this time!

jenniferroshto · March 2014

I don't remember this happening with DS but he has always been really laid back and easygoing. DD was transfered to NICU by her second night and freaked out every two and a half hours because she was hungry but they had her on a strict 3 hour eating schedule. Other than those times she was fine.

shaunamw · March 2014

I didn't sleep while at the hospital at all so I don't really remember. The bed was unconfortable, nursing was still a work in progess and the between DS wiggling, me waking to just stare at him and the nurses coming I don't think I actually slept more than 30 minutes at a time.

MissLadyTay · March 2014

I don't know about the second night being special. My son had some rough nights the first few weeks with no sleep and a lot of crying. We dealt with them as they came. He ate every three hours for the first month so it's not like even "good" nights were restful.

AngelaAmy · March 2014

DS was cluster feeding the second night and as soon as I would move him he would wake and scream. After 2 hours of this the nurse finally told me what it was and that he just needed to be next to me even if he wasn't feeding as it was the only thing that would calm him. He was an excellent sleeper other than this but apparently it's normal. It was hard because I had been awake for 2 days at this point and was afraid to sleep with him next to me. This time I think I will try to make sure DH is well rested so that if I'm nervous he can sit with me and watch baby while I try to get some sleep. Hopefully that works.

spacepotatoes · March 2014

Thanks again, ladies. Sounds like limiting visitors, trying to relax, and having DH nearby for support are good strategies.

spinsoffresonance · March 2014

I don't remember the 2nd night being different than any other night. But I also didn't sleep more than 30min at the time that entire first week!

sthomas1222 · March 2014

rainydayluck said:

I think the sleepy newborn phase stays for like 2 weeks, then it goes downhill. Then, once you are in a good swing of things, the dreaded 4 month wakeful hits. It's more when they start rolling and waking themselves up. That was the worse stage ever! I laugh (internally) at new parents who have babies younger than 4 months and are bragging about how the sleep thing isn't so bad.

Uh yeh, didn't notice anything at 2 days. Cluster feeding sucked ass, nearly non-stop nursing for 2-3 weeks that even had me going "OMJ I CAN'T DO THIS!!!". Then it was all easy til 4 months... I was just thinking as I walked down the hall to the computer how much I've enjoyed DD STTN for the past few months and wondering why the F I wanted to do it all again...

JKTTC1 · March 2014

DS was born at 9:45 and I wasn't in a reg room until after 11pm because of a tough delivery and blood pressure rising after delivery. He had to
Go to the nursery immediately and stayed until around 2-3am they called my hubby to come see them. He called the room and informed me it wS necessary to feed LO to get his heart rate up but they had to get my permission. As bad as I wanted to nurse first thing, I knew DS was having a tough time so I said yes.

We didn't get him till later that morning and he stayed all day but was jaundice so the second night had to stay in the nursery again under the light. He was brought back for feedings and I was able to successfully nurse for
12 months although we spent the first few days/weeks with the lactation consultant.

pistolpackinmomma · March 2014

Our's was the third night. It was our first night home and he cried like crazy, to the point that I called my mom at midnight crying because the baby was crying. But we eventually figured it out. I think a lot of it was that he was in yet another new place (womb to hospital to home) and we were still figuring our breastfeeding. Once I could get him to latch we were fine. However DH assembling the swing at 11:30 at night has made me advise all new parents to be sure that you have everything set up plenty early. We thought we wouldn't need it immediately so NBD, we were wrong. Very wrong.

pistolpackinmomma · March 2014

sammy.k said:

We used the nursery. They would bring DS in to feed but would bring him back to the nursery in the middle of the night. Call me a bad mom, but I had a super rough delivery and needed the rest.

We don't have that option.

If it's not busy the nurses will offer to take the baby to their station (in the little basket wheels cart thing) and being them back to eat but if they are busy that night you are expected to keep the baby in your room. The nursery is only for the babies that need the extra attention for whatever reason. We weren't allowed to hold him and sleep either but it seemed to be the only way either if us would sleep. One night I remember I was holding him and started to doze off. DH said he couldn't sleep anyhow so he would take him and let me rest. Well as soon as I handed him off I couldn't sleep and he started to doze off. So we put him back in the basket and we both sat there like zombies staring. Luckily it was a slow night for the nurses and they took him to their station that night so we could sleep. It was as if knowing someone else was keeping a close eye on him was enough to let us both sleep.

pistolpackinmomma · March 2014

rainydayluck said:

I think the sleepy newborn phase stays for like 2 weeks, then it goes downhill. Then, once you are in a good swing of things, the dreaded 4 month wakeful hits. It's more when they start rolling and waking themselves up. That was the worse stage ever! I laugh (internally) at new parents who have babies younger than 4 months and are bragging about how the sleep thing isn't so bad.

We didn't have the 4 MWF and DS STTN from 8 weeks until 8 months. Then he decided he would only sleep if held. That was when bedsharing started for us. Until right at a year old when I finally had enough and we had to resort to CIO. I had tried so many other things with no luck. Being a year old I was comfortable with the 10-15 minute intervals of crying that he had but still hated having to resort to it. We both sleep much better now, though it was oddly difficult getting used to not being kicked to death in my sleep.

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