How to decline food

BTBergstrom · March 2014

I have a friend who wants to bring over food...not to sound ungrateful but she wants to bring this enchilada dish over and I have had it before and really didn't like it. I don't want her to make it if we aren't going to eat it so how can I decline the food without being a bitch...

karacakes98 · March 2014

If you're BFing you could say you're afraid it'll hurt LO's tummy

kaking78 · March 2014

You could also blame pregnancy/postpartum heartburn.

pepperedmoth · March 2014

If she said, "I'll bring over my enchilada dish," just say, "Oh, thank you so much, is it too much to ask if you bring over (xyz) instead? I just LOVE your (xyz)."

Either that or have YH eat it.

akflutterby · March 2014

Is there any reason you can't just graciously accept it and then not eat it? I know it's not cool to have someone go through the effort of making food that will never be eaten, but if it makes her feel good... Maybe your husband would like it?

babylimas · March 2014

I have had looots of meals made for us. People want to do it so don't decline. Just take the meal, tell her you loved it and don't eat it.

mfarmer0811 · March 2014

I wouldn't decline it. Is graciously accept and then not eat it.

kmeyers0611 · March 2014

I offered to make a friend of mine tomato soup after her LO was born because I make really good tomato soup, and she said she hated to sound ungrateful bc she didn't want to turn down offered help but she couldn't eat tomatoes right now. I was not at all offended and offered a few suggestions of what I could bring instead and she picked the one that sounded best other. I was glad she said something. The whole point of going to the trouble of making something is to help her and her hubs so I am glad to know the food I made was actually eaten!

jwls84 · March 2014

babylimas said:
I have had looots of meals made for us. People want to do it so don't decline. Just take the meal, tell her you loved it and don't eat it.

This! My MIL made us a casserole, not my favorite usually can't stand it. But I am so tired and so hungry that I actually ate it anyway. One less thing I have to cook/clean up after!

lalaith50 · March 2014

I think that is really unfortunate to waste food, and totally defeats the purpose of the friend being helpful. I totally disagree with everyone telling you to just take it and not eat it. I would be horrified if I ever made something for someone and found out that's what happened. Either lie and say something like you can't eat tomatoes, or be more honest and say something like your stomach has been strange post pregnancy and you can't stomach certain things like what she wants to make.

MA&CB · March 2014

A friend said she wanted to bring a lasagna. MH won't eat ricotta, and I didn't want her to make a big meal that will mostly go to waste, so I just said "this might be a weird request, but would you mind leaving out the ricotta?" and she was totally fine with that. It's a huge lasagna, and I'm glad I said something because people bring meals to be helpful, and it's a waste of food and their time if you throw it out. I wouldn't be offended if someone asked the same of me, I'd appreciate knowing what they'd like!

BTBergstrom · March 2014

So I said that we are pretty plain eaters and that something that freezes well would be appreciated. We shall see. The only reason I don't just accept the enchiladas is cause I make some pretty awesome enchiladas and my hubby won't even touch anything else now.

pepperedmoth · March 2014

TBH as a cook I think food is exempt from the usual gift rules of "you're not allowed to express any preferences or dictate what they do."

Really, I think food offers are the one big gifting area where that is totally fine.

Just tell her your preferences.

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