Dads and diapers

kleigh926 · March 2014

DH refuses to change poopy diapers if I am there. This is starting to piss me off because sometimes I'm busy doing something else but he still won't change a poopy diaper unless he's the only one home with DD. He'll change a wet one without complaint.

Both my dad and FIL said they rarely changed diapers at all when they had babies. I guess our poor moms did it all. But that got me wondering, how are your DH's/SO's with changing diapers?

PhieryBFly · March 2014

Mine is great about it. Sometimes he volunteers to do it even if I'm headed that way just so he can sing the silly diaper changing song he made up when she was a few weeks old. At the moment, she HATES diaper changes so we both do it; one to change and one to distract/entertain.

PhieryBFly · March 2014

I have to add that my husband is weird in the good way. He never had this example and I know of very few guys who put in this much time and try enjoy it with their kids. My mom tells me my dad didn't even hold me, let alone change me, until I was two years old!

wifeofadam · March 2014

DH has gotten better through the years. I can count the number of my boys' diapers that he changed on one hand. He'll do them now with the girls, but only if we're using disposables. He has a hard time with CDs.

It's just one of those things I've learned to live with. DH doesn't like changing diapers, whereas it doesn't really bother me. I remember being extremely upset about how unfair it was when the boys were little, but as they've gotten older I've realized all the things that DH does for me that I hate and it all seems to even out. For example, we've had one of the coldest and snowiest winters I can ever remember. Every morning at 6:00 am when I saw DH outside in the negative temperatures shoveling snow from our driveway for an hour, I was happy to change diapers. I'd much rather change a month's worth of poopy diapers than have to go outside in the morning and shovel snow for an hour.

Every marriage is different and we all have dynamics that work for us. If you're feeling like your workload is uneven, then it deserves a discussion with your DH.

Puck1182 · March 2014

DH probably changes more than his share of diapers, but since DD was EBF for the first 6 months and is still BFing, I do more than my share of feedings, so it all kind of evens out. ;-)

Meggiemuggins · March 2014

We usually both do every diaper since DS hates diaper changes and needs someone to talk to/distract him. But because of my one handedness, DH does more actual changing and wiping, and I'm usually the one who distracts.

jesuisfatiguee · March 2014

I change all the diapers except for during the work day, but that would piss me off, @kleigh926. Just because you're the mom doesn't mean you're immune to the grossness or the smell of baby poo. I mean really.

cinnasugar · March 2014

DH is very good about changing poopy diapers. He's great about taking on an equal share of that type of thing.

DublinMama · March 2014

DH will do them. If we're both home, I tend to do it out of habit. But usually I just have to say, "Can you change him?" and it gets done without an issue. We both work, so it's not something I consider a job for only one of us.

Felicity86 · March 2014

I'm a SAHM mom (and thus change plenty of poopy diapers), so, if my husband is home, he's changing them! We're a fairly traditional household, but I cannot even imagine him refusing to change his share of diapers. That just seems absurd to me. And yes, we've heard from both grandfathers how back in the day they never changed a diaper...and then we laughed about it and realized it's 2014.

kleigh926 · March 2014

Yeah, I mean I consider a vast majority of the child care and housework my "job" since I don't work very much. Most of the time I don't really care. I'm faster at it and used to doing it anyway. But it bothers me that he seems to think he gets a pass on the gross stuff just because I'm used to it and he doesn't like it. He's told me that he'll get better once the next one comes since there will be more to do, but I'm not convinced...

ally2011 · March 2014

Mine would change every poopy diaper if I asked him to when he is home....and we cloth diaper. It is fair. I am with her alone for 12 hours a day so chances are good that I am going to get the majority of them......but it is nice when he is home to have help (usually I spray the diaper while he changes her) or to have someone else do it totally if I am over it. Sorry kleigh....

babywisher · March 2014

Dh will change maybe 3 diapers a month. I it because of the cloth diapers so he says. I just make sure to have aplex ones available at all times just in case I can get him to do it.

lbonga1 · March 2014

FI probably changes a majority of the diapers because he's a SAHD. I change DD when I'm home to kind of even out the work. He doesn't complain though if I'm busy and ask him to change her.

tamarar5 · March 2014

I may be complaining about my DH a lot recently, but he changes one diaper a day, at least. He hasn't really been home much lately. Once classes let out for the summer, things will get better. And he doesn't care wet or poop. Even better, he'll let E climbs all over him diaper free so that E gets some air time. He calls it Freeball mode, lmao!

Drea926 · March 2014

Honestly, DH probably changes more diapers than me. :P

He does the morning routine during the week because I leave for work at 6, so he changes that diaper. DC usually does a change right before I pick up so I normally only do one more change before bed - maybe two max.

On the weekends, in terms of poopy diapers we switch off. DS sometimes goes three times a day, so we'll do a "I'll get this one, you get the next one deal." Truthfully though, I weasel my way out of it all the time. DH is a sucker! :P

And we both had similar "1980s dads" as @DC2London described.

I'd be pissed if DH assumed it was my job to do all the diaper changing, but that's just me. :-)

ericalee27 · March 2014

I definitely do more and it definitely annoys me. Fight the good fight, kleigh! You need this straightened out before LO2 shows up!

SidraJedi · March 2014

DH thinks that he changes more diapers than he actually does, bless his heart.

I can't complain. He takes care of the litter box. I am deeply thankful for that.

TarheelMama202 · March 2014

DC2London said:
I want to add that DH's grandfather was a very typical "1960's dad," and DH's dad was probably a pretty conservative "1980's dad" (meaning he didn't really change many diapers or do much of the "baby" stuff) so my H kind of prides himself on blurring the gender roles and jumping right in where his dad didn't because, obviously, they are just as much his kids as they are mine.

This is exactly my DH. He is super-involved and changes just as many if not more diapers than I do. We cloth diaper, and the most hilarious thing is hearing him try to sell our friends who have kids on cloth dipes. He's super into it. I will say just like @DC2london that my FIL was pretty hands-off whil DH was growing up and my DH doesn't think a lot of him as a person or a father. I think he's tried to right his father's wrongs through how we raise DS.

kleigh926 · March 2014

DD pooped for the third time today right before bed. We didn't know so DH had already started the diaper change and when he found out it was poopy, he wanted me to step in and finish it.... yeah, that wasn't happening. So he did change one poopy diaper today. FTR, I definitely don't change all diapers, he does wet ones without complaining at all. It's only poopy ones.

But anyway, I intend to have a deeper discussion about this with him but not tonight, because he's in a bad mood about his job situation. Thanks for weighing in, ladies!

mishka29 · March 2014

DH probably has done more than me. When i was home all day, he would do any diapers when he got home. Luckily LO would save the poop for him lol. However there was that two week period when we started yougurt and she shit out of her diaper every single morning.

tamarar5 · March 2014

TarheelMama202 said:

DC2London said:
I want to add that DH's grandfather was a very typical "1960's dad," and DH's dad was probably a pretty conservative "1980's dad" (meaning he didn't really change many diapers or do much of the "baby" stuff) so my H kind of prides himself on blurring the gender roles and jumping right in where his dad didn't because, obviously, they are just as much his kids as they are mine.
This is exactly my DH. He is super-involved and changes just as many if not more diapers than I do. We cloth diaper, and the most hilarious thing is hearing him try to sell our friends who have kids on cloth dipes. He's super into it. I will say just like @DC2london that my FIL was pretty hands-off whil DH was growing up and my DH doesn't think a lot of him as a person or a father. I think he's tried to right his father's wrongs through how we raise DS.

We cloth diaper too, and it's so funny to hear him brag about changing diapers! Lol After a DH diaper change, E is rarely wearing pants because he likes to show of our diapers as well.

My dad, and I am quite certain FIL too, never changed a diaper ever.

jesuisfatiguee · March 2014

SidraJedi said:

DH thinks that he changes more diapers than he actually does, bless his heart.

I can't complain. He takes care of the litter box. I am deeply thankful for that.

A+++

ericalee27 · March 2014

je+suis=fatiguee said:

SidraJedi said:

DH thinks that he changes more diapers than he actually does, bless his heart.

I can't complain. He takes care of the litter box. I am deeply thankful for that.

A+++

Seriously...I do the litter box too! Somedays I feel like all I do is move poop around.

Poppy523 · March 2014

I am a SAHM too so if DH is home then he is changing DD. He usually doesn't bat an eye at a poo...just yells things and sings songs about how I saved it for him. He actually does most of the gross diapers since my morning sickness has been so bad. One bad smelling diaper can do me in...

holly321 · March 2014

I'd dh is home, dd will not let me change her diaper, daddy has to do it.

And I will admit, we both try to make the other change ds. He fights it so much lately and his poops are nasty.

TarheelMama202 · March 2014

Drea926 said:

Honestly, DH probably changes more diapers than me. :P

He does the morning routine during the week because I leave for work at 6, so he changes that diaper. DC usually does a change right before I pick up so I normally only do one more change before bed - maybe two max.

On the weekends, in terms of poopy diapers we switch off. DS sometimes goes three times a day, so we'll do a "I'll get this one, you get the next one deal." Truthfully though, I weasel my way out of it all the time. DH is a sucker! :P

And we both had similar "1980s dads" as @DC2London described.

I'd be pissed if DH assumed it was my job to do all the diaper changing, but that's just me. :-)

Of course, my DH does the morning routine during the week, too!

Twinnies!

StephPeth · March 2014

If we are both home then we legit play rock paper scissors lol.

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