canceling a sitter

Samiantha101 · March 2014

I may have to leave town unexpectedly for a funeral tomorrow. I had arrangements with a sitter to watch lo for a few hours Friday night. When you cancel, is it common courtesy to pay the sitter if you have to cancel without much notice?

FemShep · March 2014

If you cancel with less than 24 hours notice and you want to use the sitter again, I'd offer to pay them. They may turn you down, but at least make the offer.

shannm · March 2014

We had to cancel the morning of and I did pay her, not full price, but a significant part of it to acknowledge she had set the time aside.

Samiantha101 · March 2014

Ok, thank you both.

VOR · March 2014

A few days ahead? Whatever- they have time to recoup that night. Day of? I try to pay for part of the time.

jf198400 · March 2014

I guess it depends what kind of babysitter were talking about. When I was a teenager babysitting I never got paid if the family cancelled on me.

Samiantha101 · March 2014

jf198400 said:
I guess it depends what kind of babysitter were talking about. When I was a teenager babysitting I never got paid if the family cancelled on me.

Our babysitter isn't a teen. She's working on her master's degree. (Un)fortunately, I have decided against leaving town, so I'm not needing to cancel. I will take this info into consideration if ever need be.

groovygrl · March 2014

Well I guess I'm in the minority but assuming babysitting is not their job or main means of income I don't pay sitters if we have to cancel due to a last minute unexpected event like illness or a funeral. I get that they technically could have lined up another sitting opportunity but maybe the next time add a little extra on (I am thinking of our non-teenage sitters, I don't even know how I'd pay them, send a check in the mail? They don't live in the neighborhood or anything). They can cancel on me if something like illness comes up & I have to cancel my plans or figure out an alternative plan, and I don't expect them to compensate me in some way in the future.
I think I've only done that once though and it was when DD ended up being diagnosed w/ pneumonia that morning... I had more on my mind than thinking about paying the cancelled babysitter.

I guess if I cancel on them & don't pay them for it they can opt not to sit for us again, and if they cancelled on me I could opt not to use them again. Sometimes ppl might actually be relieved at the unexpected free night too, I would think.

jf198400 · March 2014

groovygrl said:
Well I guess I'm in the minority but assuming babysitting is not their job or main means of income I don't pay sitters if we have to cancel due to a last minute unexpected event like illness or a funeral. I get that they technically could have lined up another sitting opportunity but maybe the next time add a little extra on (I am thinking of our non-teenage sitters, I don't even know how I'd pay them, send a check in the mail? They don't live in the neighborhood or anything). They can cancel on me if something like illness comes up & I have to cancel my plans or figure out an alternative plan, and I don't expect them to compensate me in some way in the future.
I think I've only done that once though and it was when DD ended up being diagnosed w/ pneumonia that morning... I had more on my mind than thinking about paying the cancelled babysitter.

I guess if I cancel on them & don't pay them for it they can opt not to sit for us again, and if they cancelled on me I could opt not to use them again. Sometimes ppl might actually be relieved at the unexpected free night too, I would think.

Yea I agree, most of our babysitters are like 22-26 yrs old. I'm sure they can easily find something more fun to do on a Friday night, so I don't worry about it.

I had one babysitter cancel on me like 4hrs ahead of time (after she already confirmed with me earlier that day) so I have not asked her again.

groovygrl · March 2014

jf198400 said:

Well I guess I'm in the minority but assuming babysitting is not their job or main means of income I don't pay sitters if we have to cancel due to a last minute unexpected event like illness or a funeral. I get that they technically could have lined up another sitting opportunity but maybe the next time add a little extra on (I am thinking of our non-teenage sitters, I don't even know how I'd pay them, send a check in the mail? They don't live in the neighborhood or anything). They can cancel on me if something like illness comes up & I have to cancel my plans or figure out an alternative plan, and I don't expect them to compensate me in some way in the future.
I think I've only done that once though and it was when DD ended up being diagnosed w/ pneumonia that morning... I had more on my mind than thinking about paying the cancelled babysitter.

I guess if I cancel on them & don't pay them for it they can opt not to sit for us again, and if they cancelled on me I could opt not to use them again. Sometimes ppl might actually be relieved at the unexpected free night too, I would think.
Yea I agree, most of our babysitters are like 22-26 yrs old. I'm sure they can easily find something more fun to do on a Friday night, so I don't worry about it. I had one babysitter cancel on me like 4hrs ahead of time (after she already confirmed with me earlier that day) so I have not asked her again.

Yeah...come to think of it the person I did that to the one time hasn't sat for us since but she also got married since then & I suspect probably doesn't do a lot of babysitting anymore and might liver further away now too... We don't use sitters that much either so I figure most sitters prob stick to a few loyal families or whatever.
To keep on the whole 'owing' thing- what if I had tickets to a show and the sitter got sick & cancelled for a legit reason like sickness or a funeral and I couldn't find anyone to cover? I would not expect payment for the tickets I just had to eat or the event I missed. Eh, I dunno, maybe I'm just weird.

shannm · March 2014

groovygrl said:

jf198400 said:

Well I guess I'm in the minority but assuming babysitting is not their job or main means of income I don't pay sitters if we have to cancel due to a last minute unexpected event like illness or a funeral. I get that they technically could have lined up another sitting opportunity but maybe the next time add a little extra on (I am thinking of our non-teenage sitters, I don't even know how I'd pay them, send a check in the mail? They don't live in the neighborhood or anything). They can cancel on me if something like illness comes up & I have to cancel my plans or figure out an alternative plan, and I don't expect them to compensate me in some way in the future.
I think I've only done that once though and it was when DD ended up being diagnosed w/ pneumonia that morning... I had more on my mind than thinking about paying the cancelled babysitter.

I guess if I cancel on them & don't pay them for it they can opt not to sit for us again, and if they cancelled on me I could opt not to use them again. Sometimes ppl might actually be relieved at the unexpected free night too, I would think.
Yea I agree, most of our babysitters are like 22-26 yrs old. I'm sure they can easily find something more fun to do on a Friday night, so I don't worry about it. I had one babysitter cancel on me like 4hrs ahead of time (after she already confirmed with me earlier that day) so I have not asked her again.

Yeah...come to think of it the person I did that to the one time hasn't sat for us since but she also got married since then & I suspect probably doesn't do a lot of babysitting anymore and might liver further away now too... We don't use sitters that much either so I figure most sitters prob stick to a few loyal families or whatever.
To keep on the whole 'owing' thing- what if I had tickets to a show and the sitter got sick & cancelled for a legit reason like sickness or a funeral and I couldn't find anyone to cover? I would not expect payment for the tickets I just had to eat or the event I missed. Eh, I dunno, maybe I'm just weird.

Guess it is kind of like the tickets. The theatre isn't going to refund you for the seats if you can't make it at the last minute. You paid for their service just like you are paying the babysitter. For the record, I don't think it is mandatory but we do compensate our sitters when we cancel last minute because we love our sitters and want to make sure they stay our sitters.

groovygrl · March 2014

I suppose, though the theater doesn't know you're not coming & can't resell them. The sitter can technically do something else w/ her night & maybe you could tell her that if she is unable to line up another sitting job, you're happy to pay her for the expected time. Though if you cancel a couple days ahead & not the day of, that still seems really unnecessary to me. Do you pay everyone you cancel a service for then? I know a sitter is a different kind of relationship w/ someone but what if you schedule a painter to come & that week realize some other painter is a better deal or your friend says, I love painting, I'll just come do it for you, or you decide that yu want to use that money a different way...you cancel the painter, do you pay him? He doesn't have time to schedule another painting job. Overthinking clearly

But yes, if you want to keep a sitter ocming back then you need to treat them the way you feel is right.

groovygrl · March 2014

Good point. I am curious then, do ppl pay full price or half for cancelling? We generally pay sitters $50-$60 when we go out. And how do you pay them assumign they don't live close by, send a check in the mail? Also would you say 48 hrs or more of cancellation is ok for no pay? Just curious for future reference.

Puppies+Rainbows+Unicorns · March 2014

We like and want to keep our sitters so we pay them the full price when we cancel with little notice. Generally say we will give it to them next time we see them or they can come pick it up anytime.

scrappingcat · March 2014

This happened once and was very awkward for us. We cancelled our very sitter (19 year old) 48 hours in advance due to a work function being cancelled last minute. She was irate! She asked several times if we could still go out and do something because she had turned down a shift at her job since she had us in her schedule. The problem was that DS would have been missing his karate class and I really wanted him to go if we weren't going to this work function. She went on and on making a huge deal out of it.

I felt a little guilty initially and asked a friend who does a lot of baby-sitting and she said she has never been paid for cancellations, even very last minute. She told me that it's "part of the gig" and would never expect to be paid and would never dream of asking to be paid.

scrappingcat · March 2014

I totally understand that she would be a bit upset since she could have worked at her other job but she was basically insisting that I pay her for her time. It was 2 days notice, not 2 hours! She was home from college for the summer and watched DS regularly during the summer months. We typically pay very well for the area so I am assuming this is why she was upset. My friend who sits regularly told me she has had people call her when she was on her way to their home to cancel and she would never expect to be paid.

Honestly after her response to me canceling I wouldn't have her baby-sit again.

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