SAHP and daycare

maven212 · March 2014

SAHP - do any of you also have your children in daycare? I ask because MIL and FIL have been harassing DH about having taken time off work to raise LO. This is all part of their harassing him about my involvement in his life in the first place - but they have been on him since before she was born, and since she was about week 6 they have been accusing us of socially retarding her by having her at home. Clearly, they are nuts - I mean - bats@#$% crazy. We have a day care near us and she hangs out with the kids there during their park trips and lunch. She is also invited into one of the local daycares to visit with the kids as part of a trade for DH running a little music program for the children. She has play dates and daily trips to various parks and activities. The kid is plenty socialized.

That said, we have started to think about a few days of daycare because DH could use a day or two a week to get on with projects of his own - so I'm wondering, do any of you send your babies to daycare a few days a week. If so, how does your LO like it? What sort of novel activities etc. do they bring home to you? Do you think daycare offers your babies something that you can't give them at home?

persephonerose · March 2014

Instead of looking at a typical daycare have you considered a drop in facility? That way you can pay as you need the service instead of having to pay the minimum. Almost all the day care facilities here require 3 days a week minimum. If you don't use your days you still have to pay it to hold your spot. You can also look into Mother's day out programs that are run by many churches, they are a little more flexible since it sounds like you do not need a set full time day care. Also another option is if you are friendly/comfortable with some of the parents that you have play dates with you could consider a kid swap. One day a week they watch your child then trade off.

Hummingbirdbaby3 · March 2014

Honestly, I wouldn't even think of doing that. Being home is something that is rare now and I think it's much more beneficial. That said, there does need to be social time of course. We go to the park almost daily and he plays with kids as well as when I get together with my friends and their kids. Yoga class helps him interact with the other babies there too. I wouldn't trade this time for anything. You just have to feel confident that you're giving them the best life and that it includes social activities.

kbl13 · March 2014

I figure that if a parent is plopping their baby in front of the tv for hours and hours during the day, then sure, they are hurting them socially and a daycare with structured activities would be helpful... but any SAHP who is interacting with their LO is teaching them something. Try not to let the in-laws get to you!

That being said, B was having some major separation-anxiety anytime I (working from home) left his side... so a few friends and I started getting together once a week, split the cost of a babysitter and let the kids play together for about an hour in the playroom while we have some much needed mommy-time.

billybumbler · March 2014

Don't pay attention to your ILs... I work but I think nothing beats the one-on-one attention of a SAHP, if they are involved and take LO to various activities, and not just have LO in front of the TV like PPs said.

If YH wants to have some days a week for his projects you should look for a good DCP, but don't do it just because ILs think you "have to".

kangtini · March 2014

I am going to be on maternity leave for several months and I was thinking about take my oldest to daycare or something similar (maybe a half day program) a day or two a week. I think the interaction and more school like environment might be good for him.

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