Those with an older LO and twins

Stephanie2167 · March 2014

I need to know if this is normal. My DD is 3 1/2. My twins are 3 1/2 months. I love my twins (obviously) but I find myself sometimes daydreaming about how easy it was with just one. Sometimes I wonder if we made the right decision to have more. Is it just the 3 month twin blur? I obviously feel awful for feeling this way. I miss the ease of getting out of the house, the one-on-one time I was able to spend with just one. I never wished for DD1 to grow up faster, but I find myself wishing the twins were older already. I'm also sad that I feel like I'm now missing out on so much with DD1.

Did anyone else feel this way?

hayleydeee · March 2014

I didn't doubt my choice to have more, because I always wanted more than 1 child. But I know what you mean. Having only one seemed SO easy in comparison. But in a way I was glad I'd had my singleton first because she eased me into parenthood, and I was a lot more relaxed by the time the twins came.

You will find your grove. Hang in there. As for getting out of the house, go easy on yourself. There's no need to keep up with the schedule you had before. I still don't go as many places with all 3 as I went when I only had DD! And yes, it's true that they might not get as much 1 on 1 time with you. But they also have each other, and a sibling can be a true gift. It will warm your heart to see them playing together and interacting in the time to come.

Pittpanther · March 2014

Omg so I don't know if it's normal but I am in the same exact position. 3.5 year old ds and 3 and a half month old twins . I also find myself missing life with just one. It was soo easy. I wouldn't change anything now but I do miss it at times. I do feel sad that we cant do as much with our older DS but it wont be like that forever. I just keep telling myself that a year from now things should be somewhat easier and we will all be able to enjoy in family time and going out together.

bumpuser924057 · March 2014

100% yes. I have those thoughts a lot. I feel guilty a lot, I am sometimes jealous of my friends who have one baby they can stick in an ergo and go about their business, I miss spending time with DS and I miss being able to just cuddle one baby without having another scream it's head off looking at you. It's normal, I think. I hope, anyway!

Stephanie2167 · March 2014

Thank you ladies. I feel like such an a$$hole for feeling this way. I love my girls but I'm constantly comparing them (which I know is bad) and that gives me terrible anxiety. Even though they literally are two completely different babies. I wish I could look ahead to the future and see that everything will be ok.

kiwi443 · March 2014

I felt that way when my girls were around that age and my son was 2 1/2. It's just a hard age because infants need so much from you and there are 2 of them and only one of you. It helped a lot when they started smiling more and I fell in love with their personalities. And as they get older you are doing more than just feeding them all day. You will eventually be able to do fun things with all 3.

I know I say this all the time, but it really, really, really does get better.

TobieRose · March 2014

My twins are 4 months, my oldest is almost 2. I don't doubt my choice to have more, but I sometimes look at my babies and think, I love you both WHY couldn't you have come separately?? Even just 12 months apart! lol. I look at my friends who have just one kid and think, man, those days were so easy ... if only I knew then what I knew now!

sasky · March 2014

I haven't even had our twins yet and I'm already feeling this way.

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