Do you think this would be okay?

JD83 · March 2014

DH and I have started to talk about a baby registry. It's not that we're expecting people to take care of our financial responsibilities or anything and we're well aware that anything we're given is out of the goodness of someone's heart. That said, we're planning on being fairly minimalist with this kid and saving money wherever possible: second-hand furniture, hand-me-down clothes, thrift stores, etc. We'll have a small registry but one thing we're considering is starting a gofundme account or something similar to put toward cord blood banking. We are NOT expecting anyone to pick up that ridiculous tab for us, but since we really don't need much, and I would never expect someone to shell out hundreds of dollars for us, I thought this might be a way for those who'd rather keep spending to a minimum (but still want to get us something) to "chip in" for something that we will definitely use. What do you ladies think? Note: if by some miracle we received more than we need, the remainder would either go toward other items for the baby or into a savings account we already have set up for the baby. None of it would be used on us.

TexasTwinMom · March 2014

I know you didn't ask for this but... My two cents.

Donate the cord blood. The chances of a future child being able to use the cord blood from this child are minimal at best. A stranger is more likely to benefit and your child is more likely to benefit from a stranger. Pay it forward and hope that if the time comes, someone has done the same for you.

MrsLaLaBug · March 2014

Personally, I wouldn't feel comfortable asking people for $ so that I could bank my baby's cord blood. Simply because I feel like that's a personal choice/procedure and I would feel responsible for that expense as a parent if that was the choice I made.

mrsH1112 · March 2014

In my family this is a huge no no (even though I dont really see the big deal about it.) Even if we put on a registry that we want gift cards, no one will buy gift cards, everyone wants to buy a gift.

JD83 · March 2014

I'll have to look into a registry option for CBR. I know they have payment plans, but didn't see a registry. Will look harder for it, thank you! That would be a much better option than a general fund account, I totally agree. I am definitely keeping the baby's cord blood. We both have family histories of things that can be treated with stem cell therapy so we want to make sure that resource is available if necessary. We completely understand that this is our responsibility because we're choosing to use this service. It's not even up for debate, we're doing it. We can afford it, but I was just thinking that if someone wanted to help us out, this would be a good way to do that. I would never try to compel anyone to donate to this, just wanted to put the option to do so out there. Thank you again!

bethybeach · March 2014

TexasTwinMom said:

I know you didn't ask for this but... My two cents. Donate the cord blood. The chances of a future child being able to use the cord blood from this child are minimal at best. A stranger is more likely to benefit and your child is more likely to benefit from a stranger. Pay it forward and hope that if the time comes, someone has done the same for you.

Not all hospitals are allowing donating cord blood, last time I checked my hospital wasn't but it is a great idea.

bodziochl · March 2014

KateSays said:

TexasTwinMom said:

I know you didn't ask for this but... My two cents.

Donate the cord blood. The chances of a future child being able to use the cord blood from this child are minimal at best. A stranger is more likely to benefit and your child is more likely to benefit from a stranger. Pay it forward and hope that if the time comes, someone has done the same for you.

Also this. I wasn't going to say anything since it wasn't advice you asked for but since it was brought up... It's awfully expensive for something that your child is not likely to benefit from. Most things that stem cells are used for cannot use the stem cells that came from the person who is now sick and in need of them.

---------------------------------------------------

Good info! I don't know anything about cord blood and was wondering about it. Thanks!

TexasTwinMom · March 2014

I certainly don't judge anyone who chooses the banking route - I just think there is a lot of misinformation about it.

SmarieMcB84 · March 2014

CBR definetly has a registry. It's called cord blood registry.

I've used it for both of my boys, having a history of leukemia I wanted all my bases covered. I won't be doing it with this pregnancy since I already have two so each should hopefully benefit. I'm on mobile otherwise is provide a link. I think depending on your family and friends you decide if it's appropriate. I had told people I was doing it and they had actually asked if they could contribute, hence why I used the registry. Good luck

blue+skies · March 2014

I think it's kind of weird I guess. If I got a baby shower invite with CBR info, if probably opt to just bring a "normal" gift. But I do think it depends on your family and friends. If others in your family have banked their children's cord blood, and/or your close friends are very familiar with your concerns and reasons, then I'm sure they would like the gift option. I don't know of anyone in real life that has banked their children's cord blood, so that's what contributes to my thinking it's weird.

JD83 · March 2014

All valid input. Thank you, ladies, for giving me another perspective. :-)

StefanyaMarie · March 2014

I think in the end you should do a little more research and the decision will have to be your own. I think that some will find it rude or tacky while others will think it is perfectly fine. A lot of this depends on your family and to be honest, I don't think either opinion is right or wrong. My husband and I have chosen not to do cord banking. But I think that if my friends or a family member gave that as an option on their registry I wouldn't be at all offended or taken back by it. If it is something that you are planning on doing and will do no matter if donate money or not, then I don't see the harm in having a way for people to contribute. When my friend had her second daughter she had everything she needed. She put together a registry of the things that needed to be replaced and a couple new cute outfits and blankets and then let everyone know that if they wanted to help that she had put together a college fund for her second daughter that they could contribute to. Since it was her second child she didn't have a baby shower or anything but when people came to the hospital many brought certificates from the bank saying they have donated money. It was really sweet for a family who was going to spend money on the second baby no matter what.

SingleMom31 · March 2014

I definitely wouldn't do the general account (that seems too much like just asking for money IMO, which I don't think that you can ever do tactfully), but could see the cord blood registry. I personally wouldn't contribute to it, but I wouldn't be offended by that option the same way that I would be from a request for cash.

On a side note, I'd consider talking to your OB about this more. I went from being for it to deciding it wasn't for us. The marketing materials specifically mentioned cancer, which is fairly common in my family and my mom was willing to pay for it after suffering from breast and kidney cancer herself. What my OB was able to help with is that a.) it generally can't be used by this child, since the cells would have the same genetic defect as our child would have. It's more likely that in that case, we'd have to use child #1's to help child #2 or vice versa, or would end up looking to public banks if their sibling wasn't a match. and b.) that there aren't generally enough cells in umbicial cord blood to transplant into anyone weighing more than 90 lbs. So, older children and adults are very unlikely to be helped. The other thing that I found interesting is that 75% of samples given to public banks don't have enough stem cells to be useful, so they're discarded or used for research. Private banks though, keep them all, so even if you need it later, you might find out that there's not enough there. I'd hate to pay all the costs for a private bank to harvest it to find out that there wasn't enough cells in there when I needed it.

AR1of2 · March 2014

It would not offend me at all if someone offered me the opportunity to contribute to banking her baby's cord blood. That's all.

chusum · March 2014

I think having a fund is like asking for money. The only difference is someone is placing it into an account versus handing you a check/money. If you are going to make a registry make a registry and appreciate the gifts given. Our biggest child expense is a college fund, but aside from my parents or my ILs (who have asked to help fund it during birthday and holidays) I would never have anyone else contribute to it. I would think the same for cord banking.

rlyttle · March 2014

I donated the cord blood from DS and I felt good about that decision. Have you thought about that? I would not want to contribute towards paying for cord blood banking. People will want to buy you cute baby stuff. People don't always stick to registries either. I know it's annoying, but it's the truth. Even if you get a lot of second hand things, you will still need A LOT. We are having baby #2 and we have everything, but we still need a lot. Have you thought of having a diaper party? That can be a big expense when it comes to baby!!

Ceridwen21 · March 2014

I wouldn't be offended if I saw this request, but I certainly wouldn't contribute to it because:

1) I think parents should pay for that sort of thing themselves and not ask for donations from family and friends

2) I don't think it's a wise investment (for all of the reasons stated by PPs)

JD83 · March 2014

We did talk to the OB about it and she was very supportive of our decision. So we are definitely keeping it. DH and I are already on the bone marrow registry as potential donors, but if we do need the baby's stem cells (for anyone in the family), we want to have them available. We decided to go ahead and set up the registry on CBR's website, so it will not go through a third party. I'm really glad you guys told me about that option; didn't see it before.

I just can't imagine needing all that much other stuff that I can't get second hand, aside from a car seat. I live on a military base and people are constantly trying to get rid of baby stuff. The only reason I haven't accepted my BFF's crib is because my mom insists on buying one. BFF already gave us her Baby Bjorn and her breast pump that she never used. I just don't know what's going to be left by the time this baby comes! LOL. I guess I'm just trying to think outside the box a little and not put a burden on those who are already so kind as to want to give us something for the baby.

Thanks again, ladies, I really do appreciate everyone's input.

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