"She's so little."

arice76 · March 2014

So, I have a little vent here. My daughter was born at 37 1/2 weeks, and weighed 6 pounds 8 oz. From the time she was born, I've heard what seems like a million comments about how "little" and "tiny" she is. The comments from friends and family don't bother me as much, because they are generally loving. But it's the strangers that get me.

She's now akmost 7 weeks, and a little over 9 pounds. I was at CVS today and the pharmacist asked me how old she was. I told her 7 weeks, and she replied with "She's so little, she looks younger than that".

I feel like I might just be sensitive after a rough pregnancy and birth experience, but it is really starting to tick me off. Not all healthy babies are large, and that's ok. Geez. Maybe it's my hormones

magentawarped · March 2014

I get it all the time too, but I take it more that people forget how small babies are...they tend to think of newborns like what they see on TV, when television "newborns" are usually 2-3 months old.

ShePersisted · March 2014

Aw I'm sorry you have to deal with that. I hate comments on how little or big the baby is. When DS was born he was a nice 7 plus lbs but when I told a cousin of mine how much he weighed at birth his comment was , how come only 7 lbs, everything is normal right?' Apparently both his kids were 8 lbs and full term so to him anything below that seems off.

People are idiots! Sometimes they say it innocently and sometimes they are just plain ignorant. Just let it slide and not bother you.

kathegreat · March 2014

I'm in the same boat, my OB spent my entire pregnancy telling me I was my baby was going to be too big and that he was going to be too small (because small and fat??? I don't know). Anyway he ended up 5lbs 15oz at 40 weeks and all I get from strangers is: was he early? He's so small!
It makes me stabby.
Your baby is perfect mama and don't let the turkey's get you down!

mlynn333 · March 2014

My LO has gotten both "so small" and "so big" comments in the same day. Just like during pregnancy. People say stupid stuff without any real knowledge of what's right or appropriate.

djtippietoes · March 2014

Story of my life. We get it all the time. The funny thing is, he looks huge to me. He's about the same size as yours @arice76 at 8 weeks, maybe slightly smaller.

karich · March 2014

I've been living this for the past 5 years. DD was born at 6.15, but is a peanut at 5 years old. She has never been on a growth chart. I think she *maybe* weighs 35lbs. Pedi isn't concerned because she's always just been on her own curve.
The comments about her being "tiny" now bother her more than me...and she'll ask me frequently why people are always saying those things to her.
Poor kid.
Healthy kids come in all shapes and sizes....and people need to learn tact when talking about children.

Flyingtoast · March 2014

I have the exact opposite reaction from people. Everyone think LO is over 3 months, when she is 3 weeks today. Someone came up to me and scolded me for holding LO all wrong for a baby her age. She felt like a smuck after DH was done with her.

It bothers DH more, because to us she is small. She was born under both our birthweights, and I am personally glad of it.

dunvilles · March 2014

Lo is 13.5 lbs at 6 weeks and people say how small he is too. I think when they see a newborn compared to my 4 year old he mustlook tiny. Also it is just one of those things ppl say without thinking.

msenginerd · March 2014

My dd1 was 6 lbs 1oz when she was born and she lost a lot of weight before she finally got eating figured out. She was small at the beginning and I would always get she's so small. Although in one shopping trip I got she's so tiny and she's so big. DD2 is pretty average sized (50th percentile for weight but long) and I still get she's so tiny. She feels huge to me because at 3 weeks she's wearing the clothes dd1 wore at 2 months. People just have no clue. Just ignore them.

slwprincess · March 2014

We are getting this too. I do think that 1. People forget how small newborns are. And 2. People don't know what to say and think that commenting on baby's size is a "safe" topic like "how bout this weather?" But it does get old and yes, it sends my mind into paranoid overdrive!

keags5496 · March 2014

So annoying. We got that all the time with DS1. He's always been maaaaybe 5th percentile for weight, bt that's just his healthy. I get th opposite with my 10 pounder and it still sucks.

sdlaura · March 2014

I think just like when we were all pregnant, people just feel like they need to say something and often it can be taken the wrong way. That won't end anytime soon - I think having kids means you have to develop a thick skin about strangers' comments.

sdlaura · March 2014

RosiePeare said:

I hear this a lot, too, and it feeds into my personal paranoia. DD seems to be a really efficient eater, so she only does 10 min (at most) per feeding. I'm terrified she's not getting enough (even though she's clearly growing), and we don't have a pedi appointment until she's 8 weeks, so I have no idea what her weight is. As a result, the comments from strangers about her size just induce panic.

I think with most pediatric practices, you can stop by anytime during office hours for a weight check. I would encourage anyone who is worried about LO's weight to do it, just for peace of mind! Not that I think anyone likely has anything to worry about. Our DS has lots of doctor appts because of his heart defect, so it's nice to keep tabs on it.

ziggy903 · March 2014

Story of my life.

"He's so tiny! He must be brand new!"
"Actually, he's 10 weeks"
:-/
"But he was premature!"

sprashley · March 2014

magentawarped said:
I get it all the time too, but I take it more that people forget how small babies are...they tend to think of newborns like what they see on TV, when television "newborns" are usually 2-3 months old.

Def agree with @magentawarped‌ in fact, the day we had LO the episode of Friends was on where Monica & chandler get the unexpected twins from the surrogate. The "newborns" they had were HUGE! Like 4 month olds. We laughed about it at the time. But I do agree ppl forget how tiny babies are in the first weeks/months.

SuzyQq02 · March 2014

Yep, with our weight gain issues it bothers me too. But I just chalk it up to people needing something to say, and well, in the grand scheme... She is little! And I try to contain my impulse to yell "do you have my idea how hard were working for her to NOt be so little?"

HisLovf · March 2014

I agree that people just forget how small newborns really are. I've had friends with kids tell me that they don't remember their own LOs being so little.

I've noticed that when strangers say it, it's more of a little=cute thing. They feel like they need to say something and that's just a go-to. Whenever someone says something about LO being "so tiny" I just roll with it. I know his weight was pretty average at birth and his pedi is happy with his gain so I don't let the comments bother me.

lihau88 · March 2014

Story of my life!! It is definitely annoying. My LO was born at 4lbs 12oz. At one month she was 7lbs which is the average size of a newborn. Nobody believed me when I said she was one month old. She'll be two months this coming Friday and I'm guessing she's just under 9lbs or so, but we'll find out tomorrow.

alphaphi98 · March 2014

Story of my life too. My first child was a preemie born at 32 wks and only weighed 3 lbs 9 oz. She was really tiny & I got those comments all the time. I'd respond by saying she's a preemie when I got the small comments. Yes it was so annoying! She's still small at 18 months, but is catching up. I think she's 22 lbs now. As a preemie, she was a little late on milestones too. I'm sorry you're getting size comments. My baby boy has the same stats as your DD. I don't know how much he weighs now at 5 weeks. I'm thinking at least 10 lbs. Anything compared to my preemie is big. And actually the St. Patty's day outfit I put on my 5wk baby today is the same outfit my preemie wore last year when she was 6 months old. I totally understand what you're going through. Be strong & try not to let those rude ppl get to you. Just remember that you're baby is perfect & beautiful.

cksmith29 · March 2014

My 3 week old is 9 pounds and looks really big to me, but everyone says she's tiny. People are crazy.

RondackHiker · March 2014

Confession?

I've said this. I never met it as a "your baby is smaller than other babies!!!!!!" but I know I've said it when I've seen a newborn... Especially after having DS. He is my baby and always seems small and then I see a true baby and am reminded how tiny babies start out and how much he's really grown.

Since it appears to bug people I will stop, but know that most people are likely not commenting on the actual size of the baby compared to other newborns but more that babies as a rule are teeny.

MamaHollywood27 · March 2014

Same here and I get stabby to!! First telling me he must only be a few days/weeks old then when corrected they say he MUST have been tiny at birth! Well 6lbs4oz at 35 weeks is not tiny THEN they say "good thing he didn't go term he woulda been HUGE!"
Smh people are just dumb

coming from a women who has no filter I have common sense to not say such ignorant stuff! I usually go w the how pretty the baby's eyes are or cute they are and let the mom (if she wants) tell me more

djtippietoes · March 2014

Commenting again to say that hopefully the responses on this thread make you feel better because they made me feel better! I think that when you have a baby that actually is on the smaller side, it's easy to think that people are commenting on it because they think something is wrong or out of the ordinary, but from other people's replies, it seems like people tend to comment about infants being small compared to older babies or toddlers that their used to seeing.

arice76 · March 2014

@djtippietoes it does make me feel better, and after reading the comments, I think mostly people are just fascinated by how small infants are. It's when I get the semi-concerned look from strangers that I get a bit annoyed.

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