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intro...and need advice

jay3907jay3907 member
in Blended Families
hi Im 33weeks pregnant with my 2nd child. Been married for 2 years but together for almost 10. I have 3 SD and the oldest has just moved back in with us after years of living with her grandmother and mother. She's almost 12 and things have been rough, she feels like she can do and say whatever she wants and that isn't going to work. She does this only when her father isn't around. It's like he's the only one she doesn't disrespect so when her mother and I try and tell him how she is, he doesn't have a clue because she's totally different around him. I just can't deal with the disrespect and backtalk. I need any advice you all have....thanks
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Re: intro...and need advice

  • ambrvanambrvan member
    Ok, I don't think I understand what you're wanting here. I don't think I'm understanding some things in your post.

    You've been with your H for 10yrs, have 3 stepdaughters all 11 and under... Correct me if I'm wrong, but this sounds off...

    Your oldest SD had just "moved back in" with you... Do BM and your H not share custody? Do the kids decide when they want to visit who? Has oldest SD been out of the picture until she decided to "move back in"?

    I'm sure I'm just not getting it, but I can't really make sense of your post. And we could all better relate or advise if we had more to go on.
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  • +just+j++just+j+ member
    You need to start setting clear rules, boundaries and consequences. She's testing you.  If you have to record conversations or secretly video taping her behavior to show your husband to get him to believe you...then do it.  He needs to start backing you and making it VERY clear you are to be respected.  If he doesn't side with you as a parent...you need to give him an ultimatum or you are out.  Seriously.  If he doesn't back you or believe you, he isn't much of a partner.  
    "he offered her the world. she said she had her own" - poet Monique Duval
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