Doctor's office Anxiety - But not Stranger anxiety

Lferr417 · March 2014

Hello!

So my 14 month old son has had doctors office anxiety for about 5-6 months now. There was one AWFUL incident that happened to him with another doctor, that was the first time he cried at the doctors office. I would understand if he had stranger anxiety- but he is very friendly with the nurses and doctor at the beginning and ending of the appointment. The minute I lay him down to get him undressed is when all hell (literally) breaks loose. He has to be in my arms the whole time which is fine- but even at that point; he wont allow anyone to touch him.

This BREAKS my heart- and although he is fine running around now perfectly happy- I want to try and help him understand what is going on so that he may be a little less nervous. We tried a doctor kit, I tell him the whole time it is ok, i kiss him, hold him during it all and nothing works. There is no distracting him from the appointment. Even brought/tried numerous toys and distractions to make him comfortable...

So moms, any advice, any other LO's go through this? What age did it stop... what did you do to help them along?

Next appointment we are thinking of just sending my husband and see if that makes any difference at all...

Thanks!

pb_bride · March 2014

No help here except DS is similar. He is fine in the waiting area but as soon as we enters the exam room, he starts crying. And he clings on to me the entire time until we leave the exam room. He has bad memories of it because we always have to pin him down to have his ears checked, and he HATES it. I hope he'll eventually grow out of it but for now, it is a cry/screamfest every time.

Lferr417 · March 2014

Isnt it just the worst. It breaks my heart!

kjsmith9 · March 2014

DD is fine until the pedi tries to put the stethoscope on her. We have to hold her down to have her ears checked too... Awesome.

LSU628 · March 2014

DD was fine with the dr but would cry every time the nurse came in the room. Guess she associated them with the shots. Now that she can talk to the dr and he engages her in conversation, she enjoys going. The lollipops and stickers at the end definitely help. Is there any reason why your LO would have to lay on the table? Our pedi has me hold me LOs on my lap while he examines them. The only part he has to lay DS down for is the hip, belly, diaper area check at well visits.

pb_bride · March 2014

The pedi listens to DS with the stethoscope while I'm holding DS in my arms, but DS won't let the ear probe to go near him...he keep turning his head. So the only way the pedi can check DS's ears is to pin him down on the exam table. And to look in his mouth too.

BeachBabe22 · March 2014

My daughter was the same exact way until recently. She got the Doc McStuffin's doctor kit for Christmas and she loves it. I swear that it has helped her to relax at the doctor's office. Our last appointment was so easy and she was calm the entire time. I would suggest a toy doctor's kit and see if that helps.

mb314 · March 2014

DS is the same way. He cries bloody murder when the doctor goes near him. It makes sense - there's a stranger poking and prodding you. That's scary for a small child. I actually prefer that to him being totally content with a stranger touching him in weird places.

Lferr417 · March 2014

I have to hold him the entire time except for the mouth and nose and then hips and diaper check.

maryxc1 · March 2014

DS starting hating the doctor's office at his 12 month appointment. As soon as we walk down the hall to the exam room he starts crying. I have to hold him in my lap the entire time except to get his height. I asked one of the nurses how long this generally lasts and he said until about three. Oh well, I guess we just have to get used to it and make it as painless as possible for everyone.

pb_bride · March 2014

Oh yes... DS screamed and struggle so hard when we put him on the scale that I thought he was going to fall off and hit the ground! I was amazed we were even able to get a weight on him with all that flailing.

Wipz · March 2014

We have the same problem.. even changing diapers at home is like WWE 85% of the time.. but they make him lie down for most of the process and he hates it..specially the shots.

For some reason they say its an insurance liability thing and they can't give him his shots with him on my knee or in my arms.. which I kinda understand, but I think he would wriggle and struggle less in my arms and would be less likely to get hurt that way .. I hate having to pin him down he is a super strong lil guy and I am scared I will hurt him. Last time me and DH both had to hold him down for his shots...

I don 't think we have had a weight or height score in forever due to the problem, but I have a set of scales at home and I can tell by what he can reach and his clothes.. he's growing lol

If they could master the exams standing up like we have mastered the upside down back to front standing diaper change on your head balanced on leg whilst juggling a ball on my nose... slight exageration.. but you get the idea... we'd be in business.

I feel for you mommy's who are dealing with this too .. but last set of shots at 2 year appt till 5 YAY

pb_bride · March 2014

@Wipz, never heard of the insurance liability thing! My pedi office definitely lets DS sits on my lap while he gets his shots. I can't imagine pinning him down for the shots - much higher chance of missing or someone getting hurt!

Lferr417 · March 2014

Thank you all who replied.. Even though none of us have found a solution at least we can commiserate together!! I feel a bit better that it isn't just him! All of my friends kids had no issues so no one to swap stories with!
Hope we all get to that day where the doctors are tolerable for them

bumpuser1509193 · March 2014

My kiddo was a wreck at his 15 m visit. I trained him for his 18 m check! He got the fisher price doctor kit and we used the otoscope and stethescope daily! We gave the dogs check ups all the time! If at all possible, bring him along to your vet. I know that sounds crazy, but they look just like the pedi and they have all the same tools. I work at a vet, so easier said than done, but I let him play with all the tools...especially the otoscope.
The night before his appointment, I let him watch the episode of Curious George where he goes to the doctor ("Doctor Monkey"- it is on youtube). I think the most helpful thing I did was just explaining everything to him. I didn't realize how much he understood, and that I could just talk to him and he knew what was going to happen, and it wasn't a surprise.
At his 18 month check, the doctor couldn't get over how well behaved he was. I was/am proud how well he did.
Hope your little guy gets over his fears, nothing worse than hearing your kid scream like that.

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