Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Drea926
member
Re: FFFC!!!
My confession is that if she doesn't sleep as long as I think she needs to (which depends on what time of day it is and whether or not she had a good first nap), I let her in her crib until the time that she "should" have woken up. Obviously if she starts crying I get her. But most of the time she just sits there and babbles, so I let her go. I feel guilty for leaving her in there alone if all I'm doing is resting and not getting any actual housework done. But I need a break too, and when she doesn't take good naps it seems like there is soooo much time in the day to fill with a cranky baby who likes destroying my house and won't sit still for 5 seconds but also wants me around her or touching her at all times.
So she stays in her crib if she's up early.
First round of Clomid in May 2012= BFP #1, DD born January 2013
BFP #2 in January 2014, DS born September 2014
Every day from 1-3 I get quiet time. The oldest goes to the basement and reads or plays on the couch. If he's been good that day he gets to play a video game while he's down there for an hour or so. The middle two are in their rooms - half of the time they nap for a bit (only if they've worn themselves out playing, which is rare in the winter when we're indoors), half of the time they just read and play quietly. The baby goes down for a nap in her crib.
You would think that I would use two kid-free hours to be productive, but usually I just sit on the computer and waste time. If I'm pregnant, I nap. It's my gift to myself.
So I guess even though I have four kids that are home all day, I COULD have a perfectly clean house if I used my time wisely. But I'd rather rest!
My sister rents a house from my parents, but she doesn't even live in it. She lives with her fiance and the house sits empty, simply holding her stuff. She has said that the house is her "back up plan" in case things don't work out with her fiance, so she has somewhere to go. (I won't even get into how strange that whole concept is to me for someone who is newly engaged and supposed to be so in love).
Anyways, my family and I have been a little stressed about where we're going to be living in a month, as all of our house plans are falling through. We approached my parents and sister about renting out the house that is sitting empty. We have to be out of our house by May 1 at the latest, which was nearly two months away at the time we asked my sister. She responded that she couldn't be out of the house until April 20 - Easter weekend, which would only give us ten days (actually less since DH has no vacation time at his new job) to get the house cleaned, carpets cleaned, and get moved. I told her that was unreasonable for a family of six and asked if we could split the two months - she gets a month to move out and we get a month to fix it up and move in. She said she couldn't do it.
I don't get it. She's a single person who isn't even living in the place. I moved ten times during college and my single years and I could get it done in a weekend, even while working full-time.
I feel like she's being completely selfish. And irrational. We decided it wasn't worth the drama and told her we'd rent elsewhere and thankfully found something else that would work this week.
But I'm bitter about it. She asked me to be her maid-of-honor in her wedding next fall and in a fit of rage I deleted my Pinterest board about her wedding. If she can't do this simple thing to help her nieces and nephews because she's too busy to move out of her "storage unit", I've decided I'm too busy to put much effort into her wedding. I'm being really petty and immature, I know. I'm sure it will pass with time, but right now I'm too mad at her to even speak to her.
BFP1: DD1 born April 2011 at 34w1d via unplanned c/s due to HELLP, DVT 1 week PP
BFP3: DD2 born Feb 2013 at 38w4d via unplanned RCS due to uterine dehiscence
I kind of get it, but then I don't.
We aren't currently speaking because while all of this went down on the phone she started going on and on about how she works full-time and she's so busy and that's why she can't move and that I wouldn't understand. She said this as a single, childless person to the mother of four small kids, who homeschools and works and takes care of a home. I wouldn't understand busy.......I guess she thinks I just sit around all day. I just can't with her anymore. She's actually told me before that when she and her fiance have kids, she wants me to take care of them while she works. I would gladly do it, because that's what family does, but now I realize that she thinks that's no big deal because I have so much free time for other people's kids...
I guess the solution is me getting up before her to better police her, but I don't want to! I'm just too tired to even get up one hour earlier. (That's the FFFC part.)
@DC2London I looooove your new siggie pic.
This is not a confession.
I have tricked dh into thinking this was his plan, so the bunny will be his problem. I just get to play with it.
I'm sick of kid shows that portray parents as stupid and kids as smart. More and more, I hate kid TV.
Can you keep the remotes with you when you go to bed? That way she won't have them if she wakes up before you. We can't use our Netflix/tv box without a remote, but I'm not sure if they're all that way.
DS born: February 2013
TTC #2: Nov. 14
Chemical pregnancy 09/16/15
BFP: 12/25/15 EDD: 09/04/16
BFP1: DD1 born April 2011 at 34w1d via unplanned c/s due to HELLP, DVT 1 week PP
BFP3: DD2 born Feb 2013 at 38w4d via unplanned RCS due to uterine dehiscence
YES!!! It actually making me a complete ass to my own kids. I don't want them to be them.
the teacher took a paper from a two students who were Clearly copying...the student actually said "if you don't give it back I will tell my mom"...uk ok DO IT!
the pics mom was trying to get that added to an IEP
<--------- huge dork
We went on our honeymoon. I love some Disney stuff, some not so much. I just bought dd the little mermaid and am terribly sad she has no interest. All she, and DS care about is the Jungle Book right now.
I would be angry too. And honestly, I think you are going to have to tell her you are and why to get it out there and clear the air. This could breed long term resentment as it is horribly selfish. I amso sorry. I vote for tactful letter.
We are so thankful that our second daughter, Lillian Elizabeth "Lily", was born healthy and happy on February 11, 2013. We love her to pieces.
We lost our first daughter, Hannah Grace on May 4, 2011. She was buried on May 14 during a beautiful service at my home church. We are grateful that if she could not be here with us, that she is healed and whole with the Lord. We look forward to the day when we will get to meet her. We love her so much.
Dd stays in her crib for the most part until she yells to get out...unless it has been a really long nap and I miss her, or we have somewhere to be. I am with her 24/7, I have no guilt about this no matter what I am doing. Mamas need breaks!
We are so thankful that our second daughter, Lillian Elizabeth "Lily", was born healthy and happy on February 11, 2013. We love her to pieces.
We lost our first daughter, Hannah Grace on May 4, 2011. She was buried on May 14 during a beautiful service at my home church. We are grateful that if she could not be here with us, that she is healed and whole with the Lord. We look forward to the day when we will get to meet her. We love her so much.
Beat them to the punch and get her to fall in love with these first....they are all trying to make the world better and come with cute back stories: https://www.playmatestoys.com/brands/hearts-for-hearts-girls
We are so thankful that our second daughter, Lillian Elizabeth "Lily", was born healthy and happy on February 11, 2013. We love her to pieces.
We lost our first daughter, Hannah Grace on May 4, 2011. She was buried on May 14 during a beautiful service at my home church. We are grateful that if she could not be here with us, that she is healed and whole with the Lord. We look forward to the day when we will get to meet her. We love her so much.