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Late Term and Child Loss
milb11
member
Due Date Approaching
milb11
member
My Elijah's due date is coming up (Mar 27th). My friend had her baby yesterday. We were due 10 days apart. That just reminded me that his due date is right around the corner. I'm starting to get the dreaded lump in my throat/knots in my stomach as the day approaches. I've already requested the day off. Any tips on how to deal with the anxiety and how to get through the day when it actually comes? Also, did anyone do anything special on their little one's due date? I want to go to his grave but I feel like I should do something else.
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Re: Due Date Approaching
((Hugs)). The anticipation of his EDD was definitely harder than the day itself. MH and I both took the day off work and we all spent the day together as a family. We went to the park in the morning and sent him a balloon with notes all over it and then spent the rest of the day doing fun things as a family. That night DH and I went to dinner, just the two of us, and just talked about the day. It was actually a good day and good memories to look back on.
Do whatever you feel comfortable. I know some ladies don't feel like making a big deal, and others do. I don't think we will plan anything for his next EDD, but for me, the first one was a big deal.
NTNP 2009-2012 TTC since 2012:
Jack has handpicked his sibling up there
My blog about IF and loss ... Kate's IF Blog
We'll be doing exactly this, including the Mother's Day due (c-section) date. We did a balloon release on the last day of the grief recovery retreat I attended--I bawled like a baby. (no one has contacted me...yet)
I think taking the day off, visiting his grave and making other plans for the rest of the day sounds like a good idea. I think having an exact plan helps me, because if I'm left to "wing-it" I will choose to sit at home in my pajamas and do nothing. ((hugs))
TTC since 10/2010
IUIs # 1-5 = BFFN
IVF # 1(July 2012) = BFN
IVF # 2 (November 2012) = BFP (MIssed MC D&C @ 8w3d on 1/10/13)
Like PPs said, the anticipation of the day was definitely worse than the day itself. I had to work on the actual day, but the next day we invited our close friends and family to the cemetery and did a balloon release. We all used sharpies to write messages on the balloons to her, and it was beautiful watching them all float up to Heaven.
Afterward we had everyone back to our house for a BBQ. It definitely helped to have our family come together and show their support and love for her and to be around our loved ones. Do what you feel comfortable doing. If just a simple visit to the cemetery is what you want to do, then that's perfect. Don't feel there is anything you should or shouldn't do.
Being around everyone was just what I needed then, but in a couple weeks our daughter's first angelversary is coming up, and for this we've decided to just do a balloon release just MH, me and our rainbow. We're going to buy a new stuffed animal for her grave this year, go to the cemetery to release balloons and were getting a cake to celebrate. Honoring her first angelversary with just our little family is what feels right this time.
My Pregnancy/Parenting BLOG TTC since 5/2011, BFP #1 12/3/11, M/C 12/7/11 @ 4wks 2d. Began seeing RE Sep 2012. October 2012 Metformin 1500 mg= ovulation on CD34 BFP#2 11/14/12 9DPO, EDD 7/26/13, DX Gestational Diabetes @14 wks, our angel born sleeping 3/24/13 @ 22wks 2d. BFP #3 7/4/13 8DPO EDD 3/22/14, DX Gestational Diabetes @14 wks. started insulin @16 wks. Our rainbow, born 3/19/14 @ 39wks 6d., we're so in love!