~ TTCAL Newbie Checkin (Tuesday, March 11) ~

gscoville · March 2014

Welcome to TTC After Loss. I'm so sorry for your loss but am happy you have found us. ((hugs)) This board is full of brilliant and kind women who have experienced the hardship of losing that which is most precious, and I hope you find great comfort and support here in your journey to your rainbow baby!

For those of you so new you don't know the routine, this is a checkin for newer members of the TTCAL Board. My board name is gscoville, but you can just call me G or GS if you prefer something shorter. Please feel free to use this space to ask those "newbie" questions that feel intimidating to ask on the main board, I will try my best to get you an answer.

**Please don't feel that you have to provide individual feedback to all of the posters ahead of you, many do and it's great, but it's most definitely not required to be a part of this checkin - I'd just hate to think people might feel intimidated and not post because of this, all posts and responses are welcomed!

Please take the time to read the TTCAL blog to answer any questions you may have regarding our board etiquette, TTC, miscarriage & loss, and much more: https://www.ttcalblog.blogspot.com/ If you are a checkin regular and get a BFP, please PM me so that I can add it to the weekly checkin with a warning for other members.

Finally, if you haven't done so, please post your introduction on the main board including your story.

Weekly Update: How are you doing? Post an update including any news, thoughts, or questions - let me know how things are going for you!

Belle3184: When is you EDD? Those milestones are hard, but I’ve found them to be not as bad as I anticipate beforehand. Try to keep busy, plan something special for the day to take your mind off of things. ((hugs))

MoreThanSparrows08: Have you had any more discussions with YH on the TTC issue? It’s hard when you’re not on exactly the same page, but maybe if you can get him to open up about what’s really bothering him it will help. Guys tend to be very good at deflecting personal fears onto outside circumstances such as a move, job, etc. Good luck and ((hugs)) as you move forward!

polevaultRN: Any progress with AF on its way yet? I got to something like 45 days before getting mine post-loss, it’s a hard wait. ((hugs))

kaynix21: ((hugs)) and I hope all is going well in treating that ruptured cyst!

Birch113: When is your SIS? Have you set things up for the move to the new practice afterwards?

squeakyfrog15: What are you going to school for? And how did your thyroid appointment go on Friday?

jbiben: I’m sorry you’re on to a new cycle ((hugs))

I find that testing early is such a funny thing, it can drive ‘the crazy’ but can also help to calm it. I’ve been at this TTC thing for a long time, and have gotten to the point where I rarely test at all anymore, because seeing those stark white BFNs can hurt so much. But sometimes, when I let myself fall into symptom spotting and really thinking I could be KU, taking an earlier test that ends up negative almost makes me feel better, like at that point I know I’m ‘out’ and assume I’m out for the cycle and I don’t keep getting my hopes up and driving myself crazy. But then, every so often I have a longer LP and drive myself nuts with hope, only to have a harder crash when the test turns out negative. Damn tests!

NoellaV: Well, looks like you did O after all! You may find that FF might move your CHs as you continue through your cycle, with such a definite fallback temp on CD18 it’s a possibility anyways, so keep on temping and see what happens – but either way, you’re on your way to a new cycle and that much closer to getting off the bench.

superwife425: How are you doing this week? ((hugs))

Quote of the Week:

Question of the Week: If you’re like me, there are songs that just really resonate with you nostalgically, where you hear them and you can immediately remember where you were or what you were doing at that point in time. I have so many of these, but just one is Enid by Barenaked Ladies - that song came out my first year of college, and I fell in love with the band then. Anytime I hear that song I can remember being so carefree, enjoying life, hanging out at the college pub playing pool and just having fun!

For your QOTW, Tell about a song that is meaningful to you.

MoreThanSparrows08 · March 2014

@gscoville Thanks for running the check in! How are you today, love?

We've decided to go month-by-month and discuss where we are both emotionally and physically on or around CD1. This month has been really hard for me to TTA. I'm still technically benched until my next AF, but my heart aches so badly for a baby, and it's hard to sit back and wait. I'm sure you all know that feeling. Every time we have sexy time, I'm desperately hoping he'll just say, "ah, why the heck not?" but it hasn't happened yet. A girl can dream, right?

QOTW: I have a number of meaningful songs - Flowers by Cross Canadian Ragweed was our wedding song; Truly, Madly Deeply by Savage Garden was one of my fave songs as a teen; That's all my brain can think of today... I'm a big music lover - I was a dancer from the age of 3, ice skated from age 5 to 12, played in the school band from 6th to 12th grade, still dance today, DH is in the worship band at church, etc. Music is my therapy - some days I need classical, other's I need country, and then there are days I need my heavy metal Christian songs turned as far up on the radio as I can go without blowing the speakers (or eardrums...).

gscoville · March 2014

MoreThanSparrows08 said:

@gscoville Thanks for running the check in! How are you today, love?

We've decided to go month-by-month and discuss where we are both emotionally and physically on or around CD1. This month has been really hard for me to TTA. I'm still technically benched until my next AF, but my heart aches so badly for a baby, and it's hard to sit back and wait. I'm sure you all know that feeling. Every time we have sexy time, I'm desperately hoping he'll just say, "ah, why the heck not?" but it hasn't happened yet. A girl can dream, right?

QOTW: I have a number of meaningful songs - Flowers by Cross Canadian Ragweed was our wedding song; Truly, Madly Deeply by Savage Garden was one of my fave songs as a teen; That's all my brain can think of today... I'm a big music lover - I was a dancer from the age of 3, ice skated from age 5 to 12, played in the school band from 6th to 12th grade, still dance today, DH is in the worship band at church, etc. Music is my therapy - some days I need classical, other's I need country, and then there are days I need my heavy metal Christian songs turned as far up on the radio as I can go without blowing the speakers (or eardrums...).

I'm glad you are able to find comfort in music, I find it to be a big help as well! I skated from 9-18 myself, I think that's where I began my strong affinity to music as a form of self-expression. Unfortunately I don't play anything, but nothing gets me going like music can!

squeakyfrog15 · March 2014

@gscoville I'm doing pretty good this week! How are you?

I am in school for a degree in Interdisciplinary studies, so I have 3 disciplines: English, Psychology, and Business! I graduate in May, but I'm taking my nursing prerequisites, that way if what I'm planning to do fails, I can go back to school and try something else!

I want to be a writer, and I'm currently writing a young adult book! I have had 7 majors in the last 4 years...I really don't know what I want to do, because we only have one life and Well I need like 12! haha

The appointment was okay, basically she said my thyroid was the same as it was in 2011, so she isn't worried about it! She did, however, decide to do a bunch of hormone tests, so we may find something! I think I have a Vitamin D deficiency, as well as like no testosterone, so hopefully we figure it out soon!

QOTW: I love music...It's so hard to pick a song or a few that mean something, because they all do! I really loved Don McLean's American Pie growing up! My parent's raised us with oldies! Now I really love Penatonix, Judah and the Line, Mumford and Sons, Scars on 45...I love it all and I feel like every song changes us a little, helps define us maybe? Anyway that's me!:)

Belle3184 · March 2014

Belle3184: When is you EDD? Those milestones are hard, but I’ve found them to be not as bad as I anticipate beforehand. Try to keep busy, plan something special for the day to take your mind off of things. ((hugs))

Thanks for running the checkin GS! Hope you are well.

March 15. But, I am actually doing better than I was last week. It's hard, but I'm managing. Thankfully, I've been insanely busy. I just wish that MH was able to spend the day with me on the 15th but he will have to work.

For your QOTW, Tell about a song that is meaningful to you.

It is way too hard for me to pick a song because I love music and listen to all kinds of things from different genres. My favorite bands growing up were Better Than Ezra and The Old 97's. 80's music is my guilty pleasure. $:\$ ">

gscoville · March 2014

squeakyfrog15 said:

@gscoville I'm doing pretty good this week! How are you?

I am in school for a degree in Interdisciplinary studies, so I have 3 disciplines: English, Psychology, and Business! I graduate in May, but I'm taking my nursing prerequisites, that way if what I'm planning to do fails, I can go back to school and try something else!

I want to be a writer, and I'm currently writing a young adult book! I have had 7 majors in the last 4 years...I really don't know what I want to do, because we only have one life and Well I need like 12! haha

The appointment was okay, basically she said my thyroid was the same as it was in 2011, so she isn't worried about it! She did, however, decide to do a bunch of hormone tests, so we may find something! I think I have a Vitamin D deficiency, as well as like no testosterone, so hopefully we figure it out soon!

QOTW: I love music...It's so hard to pick a song or a few that mean something, because they all do! I really loved Don McLean's American Pie growing up! My parent's raised us with oldies! Now I really love Penatonix, Judah and the Line, Mumford and Sons, Scars on 45...I love it all and I feel like every song changes us a little, helps define us maybe? Anyway that's me!:)

Wow, you're a busy one, I love it! I've always loved to write but have never worked myself up to committing to write anything that could be published. Sometimes I feel like I'm too well-read and just wouldn't be able to find any ideas that were truly my own! lol

I'm glad you had a good appointment and have a plan going forward.

gscoville · March 2014

Belle3184 said:

Belle3184: When is you EDD? Those milestones are hard, but I’ve found them to be not as bad as I anticipate beforehand. Try to keep busy, plan something special for the day to take your mind off of things. ((hugs)) Thanks for running the checkin GS! Hope you are well. March 15. But, I am actually doing better than I was last week. It's hard, but I'm managing. Thankfully, I've been insanely busy. I just wish that MH was able to spend the day with me on the 15th but he will have to work. For your QOTW, Tell about a song that is meaningful to you. It is way too hard for me to pick a song because I love music and listen to all kinds of things from different genres. My favorite bands growing up were Better Than Ezra and The Old 97's. 80's music is my guilty pleasure. $:\$ ">

I'm glad you're having a better week, the good ones will come and go but with time you'll find you get more good than bad. ((hugs)) for you for Saturday coming up!

squeakyfrog15 · March 2014

gscoville said:

squeakyfrog15 said:

@gscoville I'm doing pretty good this week! How are you?

I am in school for a degree in Interdisciplinary studies, so I have 3 disciplines: English, Psychology, and Business! I graduate in May, but I'm taking my nursing prerequisites, that way if what I'm planning to do fails, I can go back to school and try something else!

I want to be a writer, and I'm currently writing a young adult book! I have had 7 majors in the last 4 years...I really don't know what I want to do, because we only have one life and Well I need like 12! haha

The appointment was okay, basically she said my thyroid was the same as it was in 2011, so she isn't worried about it! She did, however, decide to do a bunch of hormone tests, so we may find something! I think I have a Vitamin D deficiency, as well as like no testosterone, so hopefully we figure it out soon!

QOTW: I love music...It's so hard to pick a song or a few that mean something, because they all do! I really loved Don McLean's American Pie growing up! My parent's raised us with oldies! Now I really love Penatonix, Judah and the Line, Mumford and Sons, Scars on 45...I love it all and I feel like every song changes us a little, helps define us maybe? Anyway that's me!:)

Wow, you're a busy one, I love it! I've always loved to write but have never worked myself up to committing to write anything that could be published. Sometimes I feel like I'm too well-read and just wouldn't be able to find any ideas that were truly my own! lol

I'm glad you had a good appointment and have a plan going forward.

You should totally try! I was once told there are no new ideas, just different versions!

Buttercup509 · March 2014

Hi everyone. I'm new here. I had a missed miscarriage discovered at 16 weeks on February 13th. The baby had passed around 13 weeks. I had a D&C on Valentine's Day. It went well. I've had no complications. I'm still waiting for AF to make an appearance. I know it hasn't been that long, but I'm anxious. We were cleared to try again after a normal cycle, but I'm not sure if I will be ready emotionally. I also feel like my clock is ticking, I just turned 34.

QOTW: There are several songs that take me back. It's hard to pick one, but the one that comes to mind is a Sublime song. I had a boyfriend in my early twenties that ended up being abusive. I came home from work one day and Summertime by Sublime was set to repeat. Now every time I hear that song, I am so thankful that I left him when I did. Sorry that was a little depressing. There a lot of classical pieces that make me very emotional. I played piano and violin for years and started listening to classical very young.

ETA Fertility Friend Question

If I share my chart on the board, can everyone see my user name? I don't want to use my real name in my user name if it is visible. I looked at few charts and I saw nicknames. Is a nickname separate from a user name? Thanks!

squeakyfrog15 · March 2014

@Buttercup509 So sorry for your loss, and welcome!

@Birch113 I know what you mean! So tired!

kaynix21 · March 2014

Thanks for the check in @gscoville

Hugs out to everyone who needs it this week.

Today is CD2. Yesterday was really painful but today I feel amazing. I think my cyst is clearing up with AF.

Physically and mentally the best I've felt since the MC. And since DH will be OOT - there is no possibility for us this month and TBH I am so so so thankful for a break. I need some time to recharge and refresh my batteries. Plus I want my body to heal after everything it's been through the last few months.

I have my SIS on Friday and then there's nothing more I can do for a couple weeks so I'm going to do my best to keep my head clear for a bit.

IUI will start in April.

QOTW: Ughhhh there are so so so many. Stairway to Heave spoke to me after my MC. When You're Gone by Avril Lavigne (weird I know.) so many more I can't list them all. Then by Brad Paisley was our wedding song, and I cry every time I hear it.

kaynix21 · March 2014

Birch113 GL on yours too, keep me posted! I'll let you know!

squeakyfrog15 · March 2014

@jbiben‌ I love and hate it! Mostly I just don't know what I want to do other than be a mom so I have done a little of everything!:)

KristinDMiller · March 2014

@Buttercup509, 2/17/14 I lost my Claire bear to chorio and she was 21 weeks gestational. I haven't had AF yet and my clock is also ticking. I'm 33. Heck, with as crazy as my bleeding since the loss has been I am not sure I will ever know when to expect AF which sucks.

Hope everyone has a great week.

EmilyB15 · March 2014

I'm new here as well. I had a missed miscarriage last week caught at 8 weeks. Baby had stopped growing at 7.5 weeks. I stopped taking progesterone last week and have been miscarrying naturally starting this past weekend. I'm hoping the bleeding stops in the next few days. I had contractions for the past 2 days and I'm pretty sure most of it is out. I saw the RE yesterday and he wants me to wait 6 weeks before we start a new cycle. So we'll start IF treatments again in late April. He was surprise I miscarried based on good ultrasounds and I was taking progesterone. He's afraid this might be a new pattern for me and said to prepare for multiple miscarriages. I really hope that's not the case, but nothing we can do about it now. I'm just hoping the next cycle goes well. I really want a 2nd baby.

gscoville · March 2014

Birch113 said:

Thanks for the check in, @gscoville! How are you?

AF came today (first post-mc) so I was able to call and schedule my SIS with my current, but soon-to-be-ex-OB. I go a week from today, 3/18. I'm looking forward to getting it over with, but nervous, too.

As for the new OB, DH and I decided to hold off on moving. I found out there might be an opening within my company for my position, but in the office about 10 mins from home (as opposed to my current 1 hour+ commute). With so many things in the air, we decided staying put would alleviate a lot of stress. I feel so relieved. I have some OB recs from friends in my current area, and I have that narrowed down to two practices. Both are highly recommended, but one office is just one OB, and the other has 6 and I'm having trouble deciding.

QOTW: Tori Amos' Boys for Pele - any song from this album takes me back to 9th grade with my two best friends and my first love. Any time I hear Counting Crows' Holiday in Spain, I'm back in CA the first time I visited DH when we first started dating (best friends in HS through college and after, but didn't start dating until *after* he moved across the country - we're dumb like that!).

I'm glad AF arrived so you can move forward with things, every little step forward is a positive one! Good luck with choosing a new OB, there's always so much to consider when making such a decision.

gscoville · March 2014

jbiben said:

Thanks for running the check in G! How are you this week? Thanks for the support you give week after week. It is so appreciated! I am on a new cycle which I'm ok with now. I was convinced I was KU because my spotting started early like it did on the cycle that I got my BFP and I had a temp dip. The spotting continued for 6 days before my temp finally dropped and AF arrived. AF only lasted for 2 days. Is it possible to get AF before temp drop? I'm also concerned that with spotting starting at 7 DPO like it did this cycle that my body may not be able to sustain a healthy pregnancy. I called my doc to ask about taking progesterone supplements after O but they said they don't prescribe them. They won't see me until this happens for two or more cycles either since they said insurance won't cover it. I spotted 5 days before my BFP and now I'm thinking that could have been an early sign of a problem. I guess we will see what happens. QOTW - when I was packing for college I listened to Send Me On My Way by Rusted Roots on repeat. I was so exciting to go. Now anytime I hear that song I think of my teenage self dancing around and getting ready for the best 4 years on my life.

It is definitely possible to get AF before the temp drop. I've had so many scenarios for my period while charting - sometimes my temp drops for days before it arrives, sometimes it drops and that day I get my period, and a few times I've had my temp stay high through two or three days of my period. As a matter of fact, my temps are always super wonky during AF, so I often don't bother to temp through it anymore.

gscoville · March 2014

Buttercup509 said:

Hi everyone. I'm new here. I had a missed miscarriage discovered at 16 weeks on February 13th. The baby had passed around 13 weeks. I had a D&C on Valentine's Day. It went well. I've had no complications. I'm still waiting for AF to make an appearance. I know it hasn't been that long, but I'm anxious. We were cleared to try again after a normal cycle, but I'm not sure if I will be ready emotionally. I also feel like my clock is ticking, I just turned 34.

QOTW: There are several songs that take me back. It's hard to pick one, but the one that comes to mind is a Sublime song. I had a boyfriend in my early twenties that ended up being abusive. I came home from work one day and Summertime by Sublime was set to repeat. Now every time I hear that song, I am so thankful that I left him when I did. Sorry that was a little depressing. There a lot of classical pieces that make me very emotional. I played piano and violin for years and started listening to classical very young.

ETA Fertility Friend Question
If I share my chart on the board, can everyone see my user name? I don't want to use my real name in my user name if it is visible. I looked at few charts and I saw nicknames. Is a nickname separate from a user name? Thanks!

Welcome to the checkin ((hugs)) It's hard to wait, but there's unfortunately no set time to expect that first AF after a loss, so patience will be key. I found it helpful to get into some hobbies I'd let drop just to distract myself, plus work kept me pretty busy which helped as well. Good luck!

As for your FF question, you can set your charts to have whatever name you want - the default is a bunch of numbers and letters, not your username. Most of us name our charts to our TB sn's.

gscoville · March 2014

kaynix21 said:

Thanks for the check in @gscoville

Hugs out to everyone who needs it this week.

Today is CD2. Yesterday was really painful but today I feel amazing. I think my cyst is clearing up with AF.

Physically and mentally the best I've felt since the MC. And since DH will be OOT - there is no possibility for us this month and TBH I am so so so thankful for a break. I need some time to recharge and refresh my batteries. Plus I want my body to heal after everything it's been through the last few months.

I have my SIS on Friday and then there's nothing more I can do for a couple weeks so I'm going to do my best to keep my head clear for a bit.

IUI will start in April.

QOTW: Ughhhh there are so so so many. Stairway to Heave spoke to me after my MC. When You're Gone by Avril Lavigne (weird I know.) so many more I can't list them all. Then by Brad Paisley was our wedding song, and I cry every time I hear it.

Sometimes a break is just what is needed - I started my first clomid cycle in November, but chose not to go ahead with clomid for December because of scheduling, we were going to be out of town sharing a room with other family members right through my FW, so I knew we weren't going to be able to 'try' anyways. So I took the month off from temping, charting, everything, and it was so nice to have that break - you often don't realize how much you're stressing about things until you force yourself to take that break.

gscoville · March 2014

EmilyB15 said:

I'm new here as well. I had a missed miscarriage last week caught at 8 weeks. Baby had stopped growing at 7.5 weeks. I stopped taking progesterone last week and have been miscarrying naturally starting this past weekend. I'm hoping the bleeding stops in the next few days. I had contractions for the past 2 days and I'm pretty sure most of it is out. I saw the RE yesterday and he wants me to wait 6 weeks before we start a new cycle. So we'll start IF treatments again in late April. He was surprise I miscarried based on good ultrasounds and I was taking progesterone. He's afraid this might be a new pattern for me and said to prepare for multiple miscarriages. I really hope that's not the case, but nothing we can do about it now. I'm just hoping the next cycle goes well. I really want a 2nd baby.

Welcome to the checkin ((hugs)) and I hope the wait to start treatments again goes quickly for you!

polevaultRN · March 2014

***siggy warning-DS mentioned***

@gscoville thanks once again for the check in!

Still no AF and I'm on CD42. Yes, the wait sucks! I thought waiting for my Hcg to drop was tough...this is worse! I had pink spotting on Friday morning and I never spot before AF so I thought..."maybe it's IB!" Well I tested yesterday afternoon and got a BFN

So I dunno anymore. I'm still BFing DS once a day, but will wean him at the end of this month when he turns 2. I dunno how much that is affecting my cycles since I already had one PP AF

QOTW: I love country music! I can't choose just one song. I like Luke Bryan, Blake Shelton, Keith Urban, Tim McGraw, Carrie Underwood...the list goes on and on...

gscoville · March 2014

polevaultRN said:

***siggy warning-DS mentioned***

@gscoville thanks once again for the check in!

Still no AF and I'm on CD42. Yes, the wait sucks! I thought waiting for my Hcg to drop was tough...this is worse! I had pink spotting on Friday morning and I never spot before AF so I thought..."maybe it's IB!" Well I tested yesterday afternoon and got a BFN So I dunno anymore. I'm still BFing DS once a day, but will wean him at the end of this month when he turns 2. I dunno how much that is affecting my cycles since I already had one PP AF

QOTW: I love country music! I can't choose just one song. I like Luke Bryan, Blake Shelton, Keith Urban, Tim McGraw, Carrie Underwood...the list goes on and on...

I've heard many women report that even just BFing once a day seems to really mess with their cycles, it very commonly causes longer cycles and for those who are temping and can track it, they find those cycles sometimes even end up annovulatory. Of course some women find no effect from BFing, but everyone's different, and I can well imagine that the combination of hormonal disruption post-loss with continued BFing is leaving your body just a little confused. Unfortunately all you can do is wait things out and try to find some distraction along the way, good luck!

polevaultRN · March 2014

***DS mentioned***

Thanks @gscoville. Hopefully after I wean DS at the end of this month, things will get back to normal. I appreciate your thoughts

kaynix21 · March 2014

@Birch113 It's still morning here....only 10am. My appt isn't until 1:15.

Just waiting around sadly.

I'll check-in afterwards.

kaynix21 · March 2014

Had my SIS u/s. Everything looked good and my cyst is gone! Suck it cyst!

Want a personalized experience?

~ TTCAL Newbie Checkin (Tuesday, March 11) ~

Re: ~ TTCAL Newbie Checkin (Tuesday, March 11) ~

Choose Another Board

Search Boards

Want a personalized experience?

~~~ TTCAL Newbie Checkin (Tuesday, March 11) ~~~

Re: ~~~ TTCAL Newbie Checkin (Tuesday, March 11) ~~~

Choose Another Board

Search Boards

~ TTCAL Newbie Checkin (Tuesday, March 11) ~

Re: ~ TTCAL Newbie Checkin (Tuesday, March 11) ~