Pre-school/School-aged Check-in

stefuge · March 2014

Welcome to the pre-school/school-aged kiddo check-in!

We are so excited to start up this new group and get to know all you ladies with pre-school aged and school-aged kids! @MoreThanSparrows08 and myself will be co-running this check-in, so feel free to PM either of us if you have any questions. Those who respond to this thread today will be added to our check-in each week. Our goal is to get this check-in up on Wednesdays, assuming life doesn't get too crazy!

Our goal with this check-in is to have a space to come brag about our kids, vent as needed, ask questions or share concerns, and share this experience of being a loss mom with fellow loss moms who can relate.

For this first week, we would like to get to know a little bit more about everyone. So, as you feel comfortable, please share a little bit about yourself, your kids, your SO, your pets, your angel babies, and generally, whatever you feel like sharing!

We look forward to getting to know everyone!

stefuge · March 2014

My intro: My name is Stefany, MH is Chris. We met in high school, started dating our senior year, and have been together ever since. We were married in 2005, enjoyed a few years of being newlyweds before welcoming our first son, Landon, in 2010. I had some complications near the end of Landon's pregnancy which resulted in him being born full term via emergency C-section at 5lbs 10 oz, and spending the first 9 days of his life in the NICU. He will be 4 in June, and is loving pre-school! He has a pretty severe speech delay (he never babbled or made any sounds until he was 20 months old and speech in general has been very difficult for him) and goes to a special speech intensive and assisted technology pre-school (meaning they use devices to help with speech). We have had a fair share of medical concerns and developmental delays with him but thankfully he is now past all of that and doing so well!

We got pregnant with our second son last year (surprise!) and everything was going well until August 27, 2013, when I was 32 weeks pregnant, when I didn't feel him moving. I went to the doctor and they couldn't find his heartbeat and told us we had lost him. He was born still the next day, also via emergency C-section. It has been almost 6 1/2 months - literally the most difficult 6 1/2 months of my life.

We are hoping to try for our third child later this year. Our doctor has encouraged us to wait a full year before trying, and we both want to be sure that emotionally we are ready to try for another baby.

I love to decorate, have a degree in interior design, and am constantly giving MH new projects around the house. I also stay busy with my blog where I talk about our family, our home, and our journey through grief. We also have three kitties who are very entertaining and very patient with Landon!

mara005 · March 2014

Hello! This sounds like a good idea, thanks for making this a new check in!

I'm Ashley (27), my DH is Dave (almost 40) and our son is Fynn (4). We met in a Yahoo chat room and have been married for 5.5 years.

DH is a scientist and I'm a SAHM, we live on Long Island but I'm originally from New Hampshire and DH is from the UK.

Fynn was the perfect pregnancy, he was born at 39w5d via c-section. While I've always been overweight, after his birth I packed on more weight. In an attempt to be a better mom and have more children, I got weight loss surgery in Oct. '12. In Feb '13 I was surprised with a BFP, that pregnancy ended in a mm/c in April '13. In Dec. '13, I got another BFP that ended on Jan 1st, it was an ectopic/tubal rupture. So now I'm hoping for a one tube wonder!

For fun I do craft fairs - I crochet and make jelly/salsa/apple sauce/other stuff. I also enjoy bike riding, and bowling.

MoreThanSparrows08 · March 2014

Hey ladies! I'm Dina (27) and DH is Kalin (28) We had mutual friends in high school and started dating my senior year. We married in July of 2005 and got pregnant with our first child in November of that year. Micah was born at 40w4d with no complications at 6lbs 10 oz. He's now 7 and in second grade and the top of his class. He talks nearly non stop and is super friendly to anyone.

We got pregnant with our 2nd child in january 2008 and Elijah was born at 39w 4d with no complications at 7lbs 2 oz. He's now 5 and in pre-k 4 because of where his birthday falls. His curly hair and bright blue eyes tell me he's going to be a heartbreaker. He's shy for the first 5 minutes of meeting someone new but then he's the biggest snuggler.

We started NTNP in August 2013 and got our 3rd BFP the day before Thanksgiving. At our 1st ultrasound on 12/9 , we were told I would likely miscarry and that there were two gestational sacs. Miscarriage was confirmed via us on 12/11. We're medically benched until my next AF, but we have a lot going on right now (probably moving to a new city, buying a home, changing jobs, etc) so we aren't sure how TTC fits into that. We're taking it month by month, reevaluating our situation around CD1each month.

I own my own photography business, I love to read, write, and crochet. I also love chocolate. DH is finishing college with a bachelor's in religion -he wants to be a youth pastor. I've been drawn to nursing or midwifery, but I'm still not sure what I want to be when I grow up. I have about a year to figure it out. We live in Texas. DH is originally from California.

I look forward to getting to know you ladies!

stefuge · March 2014

@mara005 - Welcome to the group! And a fellow C-section mama! I think Fynn is such a cute name. MH is a middle school science teacher, with a degree in chemistry. He keeps me on my toes talking about all the experiments and things he and Landon will do when Landon is a little bit older. Yikes!

@MoreThanSparrows08 - yay for being high school sweethearts! And I think we were married within months of each other - how funny! I have a couple friends who are doulas, and my MIL has actually acted as a midwife a few times. She was determined to be my midwife with Landon - I was determined he would be born in a hospital. I won. Thankfully, since we had some major complications with his birth. MH and both of his siblings were born at home with a midwife, which is pretty cool.

skategirl128 · March 2014

Hi ladies! My DS was born at 37 weeks after I had complications and was on hospitalized bed rest for three weeks with kidney issues (mine). He is now 6 and in kindergarten. He has celiac disease, has been failure to thrive off and on and has growth issues. But, he's doing great in school and has been tested for gifted programming. He plays soccer and is going to be in the school play. He's a spunky little man!

His bio father passed away when he was three. That year was literally the hardest year. I eventually started seeing my now ex and got pg unexpectedly. That ended up being a partial molar in January of 2013. My best friend (now so) was around for me through the ordeal when my ex wasn't and then I discovered ex was cheating on me. After being a single mama for several months again we started officially seeing one another. We now live together and are raising my DS together. My DS bio-relatives are active in our lives and my SILs are the best! It's a large blended family but it's working. We are currently tta for many reasons.

I'm a preschool administrator for a local district and so is a teacher.

That's our long crazy story! Glad to be here with you ladies! Looking forward to getting to know all if you!

mara005 · March 2014

@stefuge‌ DH is a chemist, at a national lab. We both help out with the regional science fair every year (kindergarten - 6 grade), and I see the longing in DH's eyes, he can't wait to help Fynn with his future science fair projects!

stefuge · March 2014

@skategirl128 - Welcome to the group! Dealing with Celiac Disease at such a young age must be so challenging! As a baby, my son was always at the 5% or lower on the height and weight charts - he is now doing better but when he was littler, we were always so worried about whether he was getting enough food and how he was doing. That must be so stressful for you! How long has he had that diagnosis? I'm so sorry for your losses, but glad that things are going well now with your SO.

MoreThanSparrows08 · March 2014

@mara005 Welcome to the group! FX for your one tube wonder!

@skategirl128 Welcome to the check-in! I'm so sorry you're dealing with all that with your son. Prayers for healing coming your way. I'm glad you and SO are working things out and that you have a large support system!

@stefuge I am so sorry for the loss of sweet Colton. My youngest had a bit of a speech delay due to chronic ear infections until he had tubes placed just after his 1st birthday. I'm glad to hear Landon is doing better now! ((hugs))

MoreThanSparrows08 · March 2014

@dillngr9 Welcome to the check-in! So sorry for your losses. I'm very glad L has gotten used to N being around! My youngest will be in kindergarten next year, too!

Adam2010 · March 2014

Hi! I would love to join the group

I am Adam 2010 and I have two rainbows-Adam who just turned 4 in February and ALEX WHO IS 2 months today! I have had two losses-one was before Adam and one in between the two boys. It took DH and I 16 months and lots of testing to get Alex and we feel so blessed to have two beautiful healthy children. Although I have two rainbows my two losses are ALWAYS on my mind. It is so difficult wondering what if...
DH and I have been together 11 years and married 6 1/2 years. We started dating my senior year in high school.
Hobbies are taking walks on trails around our area,(we live in the Catskill mountains of NY so it is beautiful scenery), watching movies, and playing our sons. Before children I enjoyed reading and playing my french horn...not much time for that anymore but wouldn't have it any other way

Sorry for the format...I am mobile!

stefuge · March 2014

@MoreThanSparrows08‌ - yeah, we had all sorts of stuff done to determine what could be causing his speech delay or if it was a symptom of something else - hearing tests, a CT and MRI, a visit to a geneticist and a neurologist, along with lots of early intervention assessments (there were other concerns too, but the speech was part of it). At this point his speech therapists don't know why it is so effort full for him to talk, but he is getting better and better, and tries so hard. Broke my heart the first time he told he couldn't talk good. =(( our goal right now is to mainstream him by kindergarten. His teachers are really hopeful that that will happen.

stefuge · March 2014

@dillngr9‌ - welcome to the check-in! I am so sorry for your losses. I really worry about Landon adjusting to a sibling, as well. He was 3 1/2 when Colton was born, but now I worry that too much time is passing and he will most likely be 5 or close to it before we might have another baby. I'm glad L is adjusting - that has to make it easier on everyone!

stefuge · March 2014

@Adam2010‌ - welcome to the check-in! Another high school sweetheart - I love it! I'm so sorry for your losses, but what a blessing your boys are!

MoreThanSparrows08 · March 2014

@adam2010 So sorry for your losses. Welcome to the check-in!

srcr2011 · March 2014

Hey everyone, I'm mobile please forgive any typos.
I'm Stephanie (29) and MH is (31)our son is (3). We are from northern NM. We are trying for our second rainbow.

Right now we are TTA until may/june and its CD2.

I wanted to jump in so I can be part of the check-in next week.

Mobile bumping is hard for, sorry thus is short!!! I will do better next week.

MoreThanSparrows08 · March 2014

@esd welcome to the check-in! Glad your oldest is such a big helper!

@srcr2011 welcome to the check-in! Sorry about another cycle. Hopefully the time between now and May flies!

a&aw12707 · March 2014

Hi, I would love to join this check-in! I'm so excited there is one like this!

I'm 29, DH is 33, we have one DD (6), one DS (2 weeks), and two angel babies who came between DD and DS. DH and I met my junior year of high school and got married shortly after I graduated from college. We got our BFP with DD shortly after our wedding. My pregnancy was fairly uneventful until the end, when I developed pre-e. My delivery with her was difficult enough that we avoided for the next four years!

My biggest fear is that DD will not want to have children one day because of what she's seen us go through. She was aware of our 17 week loss, which broke her heart. She still talks about her brother in heaven all of the time. Then when DS was born and had to be taken to the NICU immediately, h world was shaken up all over again. Now that he's home, it's a little different, but for awhile having a baby was not a good thing! Has anyone else dealt with this?

Sorry for the novel, but thanks again for the check-in!
ETA: fixing paragraphs, bumping from an iPad is hard.

stefuge · March 2014

@esd - welcome to the check-in! What an amazing family you have been blessed with! Our second son was a bit of a surprise as well (a very welcome surprise, but, still, a surprise!). Your daughter sounds like a very sweet girl, helping with her younger brothers.

@srcr2011 - welcome to the check-in! I am so sorry for your losses, but glad that you will be joining us! We are also TTA, which can be frustrating, but you guys are getting close!

@dillngr9 - that is true, and hopefully what will happen! When I was pregnant with Colton, we were so concerned with how Landon would adjust, and really tried to include him with a lot of our preparations, and doctors appointments, and conversations about his little brother. It is a big adjustment, so I am glad your boys are doing better!

@a&aw12707 - Welcome to the check-in! Congratulations on your new LO! I'm so sorry to hear about your losses, and how your daughter has struggled with them. I don't have any advice, but have had many of those thoughts for our DS for when/if we get pregnant again. We told DS right away when we were expecting our second, he was the very first person we told, and he was so involved and excited. He has handled losing Colton pretty well, but he still talks about him and asks about him all the time, and I worry about what might happen, how he will react, if we get pregnant again. This is a good question - like you said, I wonder if anyone else has dealt with this?

kj808 · March 2014

Yay so happy to have this check-in!!! Thanks so much for creating it

I'm K, my DH is J. I'm 32 and he's 33. We were both born and raised in Hawaii and still live here. We have been married for 7.5 years. We have 2 children: DS is 6 1/2 and DD is 3 1/2.

DS was my first pregnancy, due October 18, 2007. I had a great pregnancy, never got sick, felt really good up until the last couple weeks when I started getting uncomfortable from being so big. He was born on October 2nd at 38 weeks and weighed 5 lbs, 6 oz. My little peanut! I was in labor for a while, so I ended up having to be induced. He is now in Kindergarten and plays baseball, basketball, and takes piano lessons (DH is an amazing piano player).

DD was my third pregnancy. I had miscarried the cycle before we conceived her. She was due July 29, 2010 and arrived at 39w5d on July 27th weighing 6 lbs 11 oz. Her pregnancy was a little scary at first, I spotted and sometimes bled on and off throughout my first trimester. I had to do a bunch of blood tests in the very beginning to track my beta levels due to having had a miscarriage, but luckily all turned out well. My spunky, lovable little girl is very outgoing, curious, friendly, playful, and definitely has a mind of her own. She is very much a girly-girl into all things princesses, dresses, jewelry, and dolls. She can be very stubborn and headstrong, but we love her all the same

She goes to a guardian-participation preschool 2 days a week with my mom and we have her meeting with a tutor once a week for private school testing later on this year.

We started trying for #3 in Sept 2012. Since then I have had 3 miscarriages: 2 chemical pregnancies (both 5 weeks) and 1 blighted ovum discovered at 8 weeks. I also had a hysteroscopy/polypectomy this past September. I am currently waiting for my first AF since the miscarriage and we'll start actively TTC again the following cycle.

I'm so excited to meet all of you and your little ones!

stefuge · March 2014

@kj808 - welcome to the check-in! I am so sorry for your losses - what a difficult road. Your DS and DD sound adorable and I look forward to getting to know you better!

MoreThanSparrows08 · March 2014

a&aw12707 So sorry for your losses. ((Hugs)) I'm so sorry your daughter had such a hard time - it's so difficult for children to understand loss.

@kj808 I'm so sorry about your losses. Many ((hugs)) GL TTC next cycle!

skategirl128 · March 2014

@stefuge‌ he was diagnosed at 3. Right at diagnosis he qualified through our local school district with a developmental delay regarding speech and gross motor.

He's now in kindergarten and is serious ahead of the game! He still has speech issues but academically is doing great. Early intervention is awesome!

Dealing with the celiac is a part of life here now. Our diets adjusted and he feels good now. His growth and weight gain are still a concern but I'm hoping he will eventually catch up!

stefuge · March 2014

@skategirl128‌ - that is so good to hear! My son also qualified for early intervention due to speech and gross motor delays and it has made a huge difference for him as well! I love hearing success stories! I am a total supporter of early intervention - it has made such a big impact for our family - and I am always encouraging friends and family who have a concern to look into it.

jonahsma · March 2014

Hi all Can this count as my initial intro??

My name Rachel (31) dh David (35) and i met 11 years ago while he was working as security at a local mall. We got married Feb 2010 and when I married him I gained two step children (14) and (13), DS (3) was born at 37 weeks. I had chronic hypertension and Pupps and my doc induced me. ds had jaundice. Noticed ds had delays in his speech and immediately contacted the school district for an eval. DX with autism, adhd May 2013. He now attends a special education pre k and he loves it , and I love it when he comes home singing. He keeps momma busy. DD (2) born at 38 weeks c section (failed nst and surprise i was having my baby) She is my princess.Found out I was pregnant with baby #3 big surprise ended in mmc at 8 wks and 5 days. Tried again for a rainbow and 9 months later we were pleased to find out we were pregnant again!! At our 23 week visit doc couldn't detect a heartbeat. i am devastated.. I am currently pg 13 weeks today and i am terrified..

Ilove to spend time with my kids, love photography, writing, decorating cakes and cupcakes and most of all I love God!!!

ThanKS @stefuge for mentioning this board!!!

stefuge · March 2014

@jonahsma‌ - welcome to the check-in! I'm so happy to see you here - I was just thinking I should PM you and invite you! So glad to hear things are going well with your pregnancy. Lots of prayers for you guys as you entire second tri and get closer to your loss date. ((Hugs))

Adam2010 · March 2014

stefuge said:
@Adam2010‌ - welcome to the check-in! Another high school sweetheart - I love it! I'm so sorry for your losses, but what a blessing your boys are!

Thank you! And yes they are

Adam2010 · March 2014

MoreThanSparrows08 said:
@adam2010 So sorry for your losses. Welcome to the check-in!

Thank you!

MoreThanSparrows08 · March 2014

@johnasma Welcome to the check-in. So sorry for your losses. FX that your pregnancy is easy and uneventful! ((hugs))

srcr2011 · March 2014

Good morning ladies. Sorry I missed so much last week! I'm back! I hope you all have a great monday.

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