Kids and dogs

chardonnay24 · March 2014

My 3 year old has only ever had repeat exposure to one dog, my parents' crazy Australian shepherd mix who freaks out and tries to herd the children, nipping their ankles and circling them. We always separate the kids (my kid, plus 5 year old nephew and 2 year old niece) and the dog when we come over to visit, once or twice a week.

My younger sister, who still lives at home, just got mini Australian shepherd. He is full grown but young so still acts like a puppy. He is friendly but very excitable and jumps/knocks over/licks the kids. My kid is really scared of the dog and shrieks, backs up quickly, and flails around, which revs up the puppy and only encourages him to give more love. My sister basically doesn't want us to come over until I can teach my kid to control himself around the dog. In fact, she thinks that it's a result of his SN and asked if we can ask our therapists for ideas for getting him to control his behavior. I don't think it's a sensory thing as much as a fear thing, and that only repeat exposure will teach both the dog and the kid to be calm around one another.

Am I totally wrong? I can ask the therapists for tricks but I really think that he just needs to learn that this dog is nothing to fear. Any tips for getting them to coexist peacefully?

Thanks!

nanabanana06 · March 2014

Sounds like she needs to take her dog to a trainer. It works both ways. You work with the kid to act appropriately around dogs and she works with her pet on how to properly greet and play with people. She's supposed to be the good pet owner and training is one of the most important things.

RondackHiker · March 2014

That dog is just going to make your child more afraid. It doesn't sound like your sister takes any responsibility so every time your kid gets nervous and backs up, that fear will be proven accurate because the dog will "come after" him. It's just in play, but it's still scary to your son.

Repeat exposures to calm, patient, well behaved dogs will help your child. It's too much to expect a three year old who is afraid not to back away.

Your son and your sister's dog aren't a good combination. They both act inappropriately, though I'd put most of the blame at the feet of the dog's owner. It's her job to manage the dog and keep the dog from becoming overexcited. Since the dog and kid can't help themselves, you and your siste need to manage things more. If your sister can't see that, I wouldn't want my son around her dog at all.

wesleycrusher · March 2014

LovelyRitaMeterMaid said:

I would be pissed about that. I avoid the houses of people whose animals are like that and they do nothing. Isla isn't scared but I don't feel like dealing with it.

I avoid houses of people with dogs like that as an adult never mind bringing a child.

Actually I avoid most houses with dogs.

wesleycrusher · March 2014

Also- are your parents on board with not having their grandson come to their house? Do they know your sister told you not to come over? Since he's legitimately afraid of the dog, it's not something he's magically going get over in a week or two.

Unknown · March 2014

This content has been removed.

kmm2150 · March 2014

Check out doggonesafe.org, they have tips for teaching kids appropriate behavior around dogs that might be helpful, and for "reading" dogs to know the not so obvious signs that a dog is anxious or scared and needs space. I also agree with pp that it is your sister's responsibility to appropriately train her dog and/or remove the dog from a situation where someone, including the dog, is not comfortable.

ASmallWonder · March 2014

Let me tell you - if I, a grown adult, enter a place and a dog jumps on me and knocks me over, you bet your ass I'm shrieking and flailing. She needs to get her dog under control and then maybe your kid wouldn't be so fucking scared.

chardonnay24 · March 2014

Okay, thanks for the replies. I'm glad to know I'm not the one being unreasonable.

The situation is all sorts of messed up. She just graduated college and is going to grad school in the fall. My parents have been on vacation (in Mexico, with their phones turned off) for the past couple weeks and are coming home Saturday to find a new dog. I guess they knew she was looking for a dog but (like me) though she'd wait until she moved to get one. She told my older sister that she didn't realize how much work this would be and is going to need to reduce her work hours and/or hire a sitter or do daycare so that the puppy gets the exercise and attention that he needs. The fact that her boyfriend will be a brand new attorney and she will be attending grad school in the fall has not apparently crossed her mind. I feel so sorry for the puppy. She has only had him for a couple weeks so hopefully she will be lining up some training for him.

She told my other sister and I that it would really be best if we just stay away from my parents' house for several weeks so that the dog can get acclimated without the stress of young children running around. My parents have no idea. I'm guessing they will lay down some ground rules when they come home. I'm also guessing that they will not want to go without seeing their other daughters and their grandkids for the sake of her dog.

I cannot imagine behaving like this at 22, but I'm going to go ahead and blame it on her youth and baby of the family status because I have no other explanation.

nanabanana06 · March 2014

That dog is going to be all sorts of messed up. If it has all it's shots she should be wanting to socialize the piss out of it. Plus taking it to a trainer. Aussies, even mini ones, require a ton of exercise and mental stimuli. Things like obedience, agility, herding, ect. They need a job to do or they get unruly. Hopefully she realizes this before it's too late.

Want a personalized experience?

Kids and dogs

Re: Kids and dogs

Choose Another Board

Search Boards