Back to work??

JackieP1023 · March 2014

Anyone else wondering how the heck to transition back to work? LO has no schedule... I have spent the last 4 hours rocking and soothing to try and get her to sleep, and it isn't happening. There's no way I'll be able to function if this continues! And we only have 1 week left!

kittieluvz · March 2014

My lo is definitely the up all night and sleep all day kind of baby, not sure how I'm going to do that one...we'll see in two weeks. lucky for me though dh starts his paternity leave when I go back. Unfortunately he doesn't wake up at night when she cries so we'll see how that one goes as well.

JackieP1023 · March 2014

OTMFL said:
I am with you. One week left. If your baby is going to daycare, i have heard that they often get routines established quickly. @TyrannosaurusLex‌ can probably address that better. Wih regards to sleep or lack thereof, I survived on a lot of coffee with my son. We can do this! (Somehow)

I wish she was going to daycare-if only for the routine aspect! She'll be staying home with DH a few days a week, and I'll WAH a few days a week.

JackieP1023 · March 2014

OTMFL said:
@JackieP1023‌

Well, that might take a little longer. A lot can change even in a week or two. Maybe she will start settling herself into a routine. Do you have some flexibility on your actual working hours or are they pretty defined? I know WAHMs with both.

Luckily, I have flexibility. As long as I put in my 4 hours a day, (I'm PT) my boss is fine. He gets it-his daughter just had a baby about a week or two after me. I'll still have to go in to work a few days a week, when DH can keep her... And that makes me a tiny bit anxious too-I've been EBF, so I don't know how that will go for DH... And I am worried about being able to pump enough, etc.

JackieP1023 · March 2014

OTMFL said:
@JackieP1023‌

Well, that might take a little longer. A lot can change even in a week or two. Maybe she will start settling herself into a routine. Do you have some flexibility on your actual working hours or are they pretty defined? I know WAHMs with both.

Luckily, I have flexibility. As long as I put in my 4 hours a day, (I'm PT) my boss is fine. He gets it-his daughter just had a baby about a week or two after me. I'll still have to go in to work a few days a week, when DH can keep her... And that makes me a tiny bit anxious too-I've been EBF, so I don't know how that will go for DH... And I am worried about being able to pump enough, etc.

slwprincess · March 2014

I never got my first two on a schedule before returning to work (at 8 and 10 wks). Daycare had them on a schedule by the end of the first week! I'm actually nervous this time b/c I'm SAH and won't have daycare to bail me out! Don't stress about the schedule for baby. Let daycare handle that and then make sure you keep to the schedule on weekends and you'll be good!

slwprincess · March 2014

Oops just saw that you aren't doing daycare... That does complicate things. I would try to establish some sort of daily schedule- not set in stone but just a rhythm for how the day should go. For example, mine is like this with 3 kids...

Wake up, take oldest to school, breakfast, 1-2 household chores, morning activity/outing (this may just be errands with a newborn- just something out of the house), home for lunch, nap, pick up oldest from school, quiet play time, tv show while I fix dinner, eat, baths, bedtime.

I plan to work the newborn into the toddlers schedule but will be flexible enough to know that the newborn ultimately runs the show!

Firefly9 · March 2014

Coffee. Lots and lots and lots of coffee.

versed · March 2014

Firefly9 said:

Coffee. Lots and lots and lots of coffee.

Yup - this.

Two things will start to happen: 1) you'll start needing less sleep to function; and 2) baby will start sleeping more. Just give yourself a little slack until those happen.

JackieP1023 · March 2014

It's hard to get into a routine-when I'm home (even WAH-since it's flexible), I have a hard time keeping mySELF in any routine! (Even meal-wise, sometimes I skip breakfast, sometimes lunch is at 3pm...) And, when we have a bad night, I tend to sleep in... (If I would have gotten up at 'normal' time this morning, I would have only gotten about 2 hours of sleep). It's all overwhelming, and will be harder, too, because DH works 12 hr rotating swing shifts (2-3 12 hr days and 2-3 12 hr nights within the same week), so I can imagine when he is caring for her, routine will be all screwy too! I'm actually looking forward to getting her in daycare, just because we will be able to get into a routine!

ahare2009 · March 2014

I'm returning to work next Thursday and am curious to see how all this will go. Right now I have the luxury of sleeping in later or taking a nap, which obviously can't happen once I go back to work. LO will be staying with a babysitter, so hopefully he will get on a schedule there.

Rbfdac1 · March 2014

I returned to work last Monday- LO just started sleeping 5-6 hours at night this weekend and DH was traveling my first week back to work. It's so odd, but when the times comes you will just be able to do it. I was waking up every 2.5 to 3 hours at night, up for an hour pumping and feeding and up at 6 for work. Somehow, I was not a walking zombie. I think something about being a mother changes you. I felt a little more tired than normal, but made it just fine. I think you just do what you gotta do. You ladies will all be perfectly fine!

sdlaura · March 2014

In my opinion there is no way to prepare, so you might as well try not to stress about it and just go with the flow when it happens - just cut yourself slack on anything not work or baby, and you will eventually get into a groove.

VeronicaAnn143 · March 2014

I'll chime in on this. I went back to work last tuesday after LO had his 2 month shots monday.

Honestly, I was relieved. I was worried, scared, stressed and it all just worked out. We were a little lucky that the NICU put him on a 3 hour schedule. We started to deviate from that at around 7 weeks. All of a sudden at 8.5 weeks he started giving us a 5 hour stretch of sleep. It has occasionally been a 6 or 7 hour stretch but usually just 5.

I'll go into some detail on our evening routine which really helps us both function well at work and not be zombies.

Our PM routine looks like this:

DH gets home from work and picks up LO from MIL's.
He feeds him around 5:30-6.
I get home at 6, empty the dishwasher, and pump and play with LO while DH cooks dinner.
LO usually falls asleep around 7.
We put him in his swing, he naps, we eat and usually watch House of Cards.
After dinner, DH cleans the kitchen, I help, and we wash and fill all of the bottles.
I make and pack our lunches for the next day.
Now, LO usually starts to stir around 8:30-9.
One of us gets in the shower, the other one strips LO down and wraps him in a towel and delivers him to the showering spouse with a wash cloth. We bring him in the shower, bathe him, and pass him back out to the other parent. He freaking LOVES the shower, half the time he falls asleep in it.
We get him in pajamas, tight swaddle, give him a bottle around 9:30 and put him down in his crib for the night.
I pump again before bed.
He usually sleeps till 2:30-3...occasionally as late as 4.
DH takes the first feed, I take the second around 5:30-6.
DH leaves for work at 6:30 and I leave around 8:15 and take LO to MIL's.

I know that turned into a novel but I am in love with our routine. After LO goes down at 9:30 we have eaten, have a clean kitchen, packed lunches, filled bottles and a minute to freaking relax.

If anyone is looking for a routine to try out, I recommend this one, everyone is different but this works well for us and LO knows it's bedtime. Him sleeping well and only waking up twice is critical to my being able to function at work.

All in all, I'm thrilled to be back at work. I feel a little less like a slave to a non-existent daily routine and more like a human again. I'm a better mom when I get home because I'm not burnt out. I give SAHMs a TON of credit because I really don't think I could do it. It's hard man.

ETA: Also, caffeine.

VeronicaAnn143 · March 2014

@golfergirl08‌ no problem! I think the fact that the shower is also white noise helps. But yes, D does love being all the way in the water. He usually puts his head on my chest and sighs heavily like he's had a rough day...it's so damn cute.

JackieP1023 · March 2014

Glad to get some tips from moms who have already gotten something accomplished in this area! We only last night got DD to take a bath without screaming through the whole thing. I am hoping this last week we can get a schedule better ironed out. Makes me really wish my leave was longer-even by a few weeks!

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