WTF, nosy coworker

Maebb · March 2014

So, I mentioned last week that a coworker (technically a manager in a different group but not my manager) had been asking me interrogative, personal questions about when DH and I are planning for baby #2.

The same guy knew that I was pumping before because he and I would sometimes walk (with a group of people) during lunch, and I stopped that when I was pumping because my schedule no longer allowed for it. I quit BFing 3 months ago, but I haven't started walking during lunch again due to a number of factors. I didn't feel the need to discuss this with him because it's not really his business. (right?!)

Today I was walking toward the break room with my lunch bag, and he glanced down at the bag and said, "So, when are we going to quit this?" I was honestly confused by his question because I thought he meant my eating lunch, and I said, "I eat lunch and snacks every day, and I'm probably going to continue. I don't really know what you mean?" Then he laughed because he thought that was my pump bag. I have no idea why he said "we" in that case. It's just weird.

First family planning, and now breastfeeding? Do I have no privacy? I know from a HR perspective and just from a "how to show respect to others" perspective, I shouldn't tolerate it. I gave him a Jenna Marbles "wtf" kind of look (I am at work and about to leave, so I don't have time to look up a pic of what I mean), but this is two strikes, and the next time this guy says something to me, I'm going to be more direct about how it is unacceptable.

I don't know if I want advice or just your commiseration on how wrong it is to get these kinds of comments from someone who is not a close friend. WTF, nosy coworker.

Helenahhandbasket · March 2014

I can sympathize-- I work in a very "friendly" environment, but that would ick me out-- especially coming from a dude.

I would continue to give him the most sarcastic responses I could muster up.

Kasstik · March 2014

Yeah, That's just creepy and weird. How is it any of his business whether you are pumping? And the "we" just makes it creepy.

I think next time more direct and potentially talking to someone at your work about it. Maybe he is going around saying creepy things to lots of people and no one is saying anything.

CinemaGoddess · March 2014

Fuck this guy. Report him to HR.

missyishere · March 2014

That is really creepy, and he needs to know he is majorly overstepping boundaries. Team report him.

CinemaGoddess · March 2014

He does not need a constant update on the state of your boobs or your vagina or your uterus.

The only person (outside of immediate family) who can ask those questions are your doctor.

How would he like it if someone asked him how his dick was feeling after that latest flare-up of herpes?

dramamama2be · March 2014

You've tolerated his bs for far too long now. I'd report him in a heartbeat.

SpaceGirlSpiff · March 2014

This guy just cares way too fucking much about what your body is doing. Creepy.

HR time.

KaramelSutra · March 2014

I can totally empathize. I have a doctor at work that knew I needed to pump but kept me out for a while saying he didn't feel comfortable with the other nurses and this sick kid. So I stayed out 2 hours past, and I finally said I had to go.

He looked me up and down and nodded his head and said 'ya you do look rather engorged...'

I felt so sleazy and I didn't even do anything. Yuck. I didn't report him but I should have.

ppants · March 2014

I don't get waiting "one more time" for him to make you feel weird and uncomfortable before you stand up for yourself.

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WTF, nosy coworker

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