June 2014 Moms

Dealing with a non-supportive hospital visit.

OleSkilletOleSkillet member
edited March 2014 in June 2014 Moms
Hello all! 
I wanted to write this post, because I had a rather unpleasant experience at the hospital last night, 
and was wondering if anyone else has had this problem? How would you react, or how to deal with it?
I understand with first babies (this is my first) sometimes things can worry you, but I feel that I am pretty grounded with things, and do not over-react easily.
Hope it is alright to share my story and get some input! 

To give a bit of background, this week has been rough for me.  I just hit 27 weeks, and baby girl is jumping around like crazy in there! 
About 3 days ago I had a near-fainting spell. This first one ever in my life, and I didn't pass out all the way. Luckily I was with friends and after drinking some ice water, felt better after a little while. I called my OB and from what I was told, this happens to women with pregnancy. They brought me into the office the next day, checked my blood sugar, blood pressure and iron levels. Everything was normal, and again, I was reassured that this happens in pregnancy. My doc told me to carry some juice or cookies with me in case it happens again. I have my next check up in two days, when I also do the lovely glucose test. 
I have been taking it easy since then, because quite honestly it was rather scary! I decided to give myself a couple days to get back up to normal. 
Yesterday, I took a nap, and woke up around 6:30 in the evening with the worst period like cramps in my abdomen. Then they moved to my back. I have had round ligament pain from pretty early on in this pregnancy, especially in my hips, but this was nothing like that. It was an intense pressure like ache in my low back. Then it started getting worse in waves. Every few minutes it would get a lot stronger, (sorry TMI here!) and every time it would get strong I would feel and intense urge to go number 2. I had already went 2 times that day, so I knew I wasn't blocked up! The pain waves kept coming about 6 or 7 minutes apart and lasting for about a minute or so each time. This kept happening for an hour and a half, and I decided to call my doctor and ask them about it. Also, I took a Tylenol and a hot bath, seeing if that would help. After the bath it just kept getting worse and worse, to the point where I could hardly talk or do anything during the pain surges. My doctor said for me to go in to the ER and get checked out, and was very nice and supportive. 
So I took myself to the ER, and they transferred me over to L&D. I gave them the rundown, even telling them about almost fainting a couple days earlier. They took some blood, did all the standard tests, etc. A few minutes later a woman came in and introduced herself as a midwife. She said that all the tests had come back normal and she did not believe I was having any contractions, for I was too early for that. She then started talking to me about my near-fainting spell a couple days before. She asked what I ate everyday, and I told her. I feel I eat rather healthy...no fast food, no soda, no candy, etc. Most of my diet is made up of beans, lean meats, green veggies, berries, assorted other fruits, grains, etc. I drink TONS of water. After telling her some of these things, she just starting telling me everything I eat was wrong, in a very condescending manner. She told me "You really need to learn how to read labels, especially if you are going to be feeding a child. Also they probably have things you couldn't even pronounce in their ingredients". 
Also she asked, "Do you know what high fructose corn syrup is? Do you know what quinoa is?" and really kept drilling me. She told me, "sure you might eat a veggie sandwhich, but the multi-grain bread you ate it on is going to turn into sugar." She told me not eat bananas, no granola, etc. Really just going off on me about these things, as I laid there in pain in the bed. I informed her I read labels, and I know what all these things are, and that I was at the ER for the back pain I was having, not to discuss my diet, or even the near-fainting spell. She then informed me that the only reason I was having back pain was because I was 27 weeks pregnant, and the real problem is "I need to eat better". I was terribly insulted, as my healthy diet has been one of my main concerns throughout this pregnancy.  I was never checked for contractions or anything else. A short time after that I was sent home, without ever seeing a doctor. My pain lasted throughout the night, and finally subsided this afternoon, about 16 hours later. I did call my OB office back today, and told them what happened and they were surprised that I never even saw a doctor. They told me to monitor it and if it starts to get really bad again, to go back in.

I apologize for the long post, but I wanted to come here to discuss this, and find out if anyone else has encountered this behavior? How did you deal with it? I know we only want the best for our unborn babies, and we should not be condescended if we are just wanting to make sure things are alright. Thank you for your time!  

Re: Dealing with a non-supportive hospital visit.

  • I went to the ER, who transferred me over to L&D, on the other side of the hospital. Sorry I didn't clarify! 
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  • Last pregnancy I had contractions at 20 weeks.  I called my doc who told me to go to the hospital (after I described the cramping pain, just like when I get my period, etc).  I saw a junior resident there, who, much like it sounds like they told you, said that it was too early for contractions and that they might be BH.  I had been having BH and knew these were different.  They sent me home.

    I returned 8 hours later when the contractions were every 5 minutes apart, lasting 45 sec and I wasn't able to talk/move during them.  This time I only saw the attending doctor, they hooked me up to a monitor and confirmed that they were in fact contractions.  They checked my cervix (long, firm and closed, thank goodness), did blood work (which showed I was severely dehydrated), gave me lots of IV fluids and kept me until they started to slow down (after about 6 hours and 2L of saline).  They wanted to admit me but agreed to let me go home as long as I promised to drink 3L of fluids a day and be on strict bedrest until they were completely gone, as well as return if they became more frequent.  72 hours later I was contraction free.

    Not very helpful, but I understand the frustration of not being taken seriously the first time.  If your pains return, go back and insist on seeing the doctor.
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  • It was truly an enraging visit. Thanks for your responses!! I don't feel as frustrated after getting all that off my chest! Haha!
  • That is what I was wondering as well, BrightEyes...
  • What state are you in OP? That will make a difference as far as if a CNM can do an independent eval and discharge...
  • OleSkilletOleSkillet member
    edited March 2014
    I am in Missouri. Went to the hospital my doc told me too, as well! 
  • I would have punched her. I worked at an OB office and I do know that the midwives take call and see patients for the docs but our midwives aren't such jerks. They are usually a good resource for when the docs aren't available. I have no problem seeing a midwife or resident if the doc is busy delivering someone else but there is no excuse for a bad attitude like that and not addressing the real issue.

    I am a first timer too and everything freaks me out but luckily I have a live in doctor available to me 24/7. Although I do believe I am driving him crazy with all my questions and "is this ok?", "should I be concerned with this" poor DH :)
  • hjl050308hjl050308 member
    edited March 2014

    I cant believe you didnt even see a doctor. Is that even allowed? If something had gone wrong because they didnt see you, wouldnt they be so liable?

    With my last son, at 33w3d, I went in with contractions (3rd night in a row), the on call doctor never came in to see me and instead had the nurse check me, hook me up for a NST and send me home on 2 Ambien. Needless to say I was back in the hospital 3 hours later, water broken, and fully dialated.

    Sorry OP that you had a bad experience!
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  • That is just insane and so frustrating. You sound intelligent and well informed - listen to your gut and not this crazy person! 
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  • I agree with pp. This is a total outrage! I would put in a formal complaint and demand answers. I am sorry you were treated this way, totally unacceptable. I am glad that you are now feeling better. Your diet sounds good to me! I had a dizzy spell two weeks ago for the first time ever, it really scared me. Just chalked it up to not eating frequently enough. I ate a banana and felt fine. That midwife was a moron.
  • Mom&nurse said:
    Question. Was she some super slim or big lady? Just curious.
    What does that have to do with anything? 





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  • flerlgirl said:


    Mom&nurse said:

    Question. Was she some super slim or big lady? Just curious.

    What does that have to do with anything? 

    Really nothing just personally curious.

    I would like it for a visual. Was she some healthy girl trying to push off her own ideas on you because she knows best from personal experience ?

    Or was she over weight and really had no room to talk.

    I'm not by any means trying to judge. I'm overweight so I would feel I would in no way be able to tell someone what to eat healthy. Obviously from my diet.

    Just curious mostly. I'm very visual.

  • Mom&nurse said:
    Mom&nurse said:
    Question. Was she some super slim or big lady? Just curious.
    What does that have to do with anything? 
    Really nothing just personally curious. I would like it for a visual. Was she some healthy girl trying to push off her own ideas on you because she knows best from personal experience ? Or was she over weight and really had no room to talk. I'm not by any means trying to judge. I'm overweight so I would feel I would in no way be able to tell someone what to eat healthy. Obviously from my diet. Just curious mostly. I'm very visual.
    I mean, being thin doesn't equal being healthy. And the reverse goes for being overweight; it doesn't mean you are unhealthy. These are silly assumptions. 





    I'm not new. I just hate The Bump. 

  • Sorry that you had such a bad experience. As previous posters said, the midwife that you saw seems totally out of line and dismissive. For what it's worth, I cannot believe that they never checked whether or not you were actually having contractions. When I had our first son (at 38 weeks), I experienced back labor, and the way you described your back pain above, minus the need for a bowel movement, is pretty much a spot on description for how my contractions started and progressed.
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  • @curlylocks3 yeah, totally. I have no problems with midwives, and I didn't mean to come off that way for sure. I was just appalled at her behavior and comments. That is what I addressed in the complaint.
  • @curlylocks3 - That's an excellent point. In fact, I prefer to see CMW because doctors these days are just too busy, and don't have time to really get to the bottom of the issue many times. I'm disappointed this lady have OP such a bad experience with midwives. They aren't all like that, promise!!
    I think midwives are like doctors- there are some excellent ones out there, some decent but not fabulous ones, and some awful ones. Some people just aren't candidates for midwife care- I myself am not because I'm too high risk. But they are a great option for many :)
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  • curlylocks3curlylocks3 member
    edited March 2014
    OleSkillet said: @curlylocks3 yeah, totally. I have no problems with midwives, and I didn't mean to come off that way for sure. I was just appalled at her behavior and comments. That is what I addressed in the complaint. ------------stupid lack of formatting, this is where my comment begins---------
      I'm sorry, I hope I didn't come off as thinking thats what you meant because its not what I intended at all. I was just trying to give an alternative viewpoint on why you hadn't seen
    your particular doctor- because I think its a different approach from what a lot of people expect when they go in to L&D. My advice about filing the complaint would have been the same if the comments had been made by an OB as well. 
    Sorry for any confusion- I'm a little sleep deprived so my original comment might not have been worded quite as clearly as I would have hoped. :)
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  • Sorry you had such an unpleasant and scary experience, but I'm glad you're doing okay now. I also want to suggest letting your OB's office know about what happened. At the least, they should be aware of a potential problem with that ER, and they may actually be able to have input at the hospital.
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  • @curlylocks3 oh it's ok! I'm ready for a nap myself! Haha! I think it was a great point to bring up, because there are a lot of factors when people go into L&D and everyone's experience is different.
  • @temurlang1 yes, totally. I let them know the next day. They said regardless of what she said if it kept happening to go back, or somewhere else, and we're actually confused by everything that had happened. I am not delivering at this hospital, and the one I am delivering at makes me feel very comfortable whenever I have been there for tours, classes, etc. I just went to this one because the doc recommended it.
  • @oleskillet I'm glad to hear you're not delivering at that hospital, that was gonna be my next question! :)

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  • @oleskillet props to you for being your own advocate, and to your doctor for believing you and acting in your best interest! Also, glad to hear you are still feeling better :)

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  • I'm glad you and baby are doing well now.
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  • So sorry you had that experience! I would definitely file a complaint, bedside manner is a large portion of being a Dr besides the obvious required knowledge. Given my hormones these days, I'd have slapped her if I was able

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  • Babywear said:
    Wow, you had a scary experience and the midwife was terrible. I agree she is out of line. I'd be putting in a complaint. I'm sorry you were treated this way.
    I would absolutely complain too.  I know its not always the best option but I avoid ERs like the plague because I got misdiagnosed with a migraine and sent home which turned out to be a blood clot that I had brain surgery on the day after the ER visit. 

    What if you really were having contractions and this moron sent you home! And it is not too early to have contractions?!? Did she really say that?  Has she never hear of preterm labor before?  What an idiot.  

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  • edited March 2014
    Sorry you went through all that and yes definitively file a formal complaint so that no other preggo lady or other patients have to go through what you went through. Besides dehydration that can cause contractions nothing you eat/don't eat would cause it. That woman is a moron! And you are supposed to eat banannas! :)
  • ElTrain5 said:
    I love the "it's too early for you to be having contractions" comment she gave you. Because no one has ever given birth before 27 weeks before, obviously. What an idiot. And as we all know, qunoia is the cure for pre term labor.
    I know, right?  "It's too early for you to have contractions."  YES.  THAT WOULD BE THE PROBLEM HERE.

    Good on you, OP, for taking action!  Rock star!
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