Late Term and Child Loss

I got through a big day yesterday

I've been getting anxiety just at the thought of leaving the house, but yesterday I had my post birth appointment, so I knew I had to get out.  It was initially scheduled for the day that Q passed away, and I had cancelled a few days before because I wasn't sure how sick he would be.  DH went with me, and the nurse got us as we walked down the hallway, so we didn't have to sit with moms who brought their babies, so that was nice.  I did see a few babies as we were going into the building, and that made me teary, but I was so glad to have DH with me.
Last night was also the first night we have left the house.  We had plans with two of our closest couple friends to go to a basketball game.  I knew we could back out if we needed to, but I was prepping myself all week for Friday night, so I actually showered, put on somewhat cute clothes, and put on makeup.  We had a nice time, and although I teared up a handful of times, it was nice being with friends that understood.
So about 3.5 weeks is how long it took me.  And while I'm not ready to go out frequently, I made it through without collapsing into a puddle of tears, so I consider it a win.  

Me 32 (Stage IV Endometriosis, short luteal phase) DH 38

Married 5/2010

January 2014- DS born healthy at 35.4 weeks

February 2014- DS passed away due to complications from adenovirus

February 2015- Rainbow baby DD born at 36.3 weeks

My chart: http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/42fd32 

 


Re: I got through a big day yesterday

  • ***Ticker warning***

    Getting out those first few times is not easy, nor is it easy to go back to some of the places that hold memories. Big ((hugs))!
    Lilypie - (qptF)


    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers 
    "Elsie Irene was born sleeping at 35w 6d on December 8, 2012. Mommy and Daddy miss you sweet girl."


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  • ((((((Hugs))))))) hard first steps.

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        My Blog

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
      

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
    BFP# 1 7/7/12 Beautiful DD born still at 36 weeks 5 days on 3/2/13
    Diagnosed with PCOS in 2005. Started Metformin July 2013

    BFP # 2 8/7/14 EDD 4/22/15
    Please be our rainbow!!

    **All AL Welcome**

  • <3 it's definitely not easy to rejoin the oblivious world- congratulations on making those first steps. I hope that your path is filled with healing as you continue to open yourself up.
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    Anniversary

    TTC since 2008
    Dh:34, no issues.  Me:31, Endo, slightly hypothyroid, deformed ovary, paracentric inversion.
    4 Gonal-F, Cetrotide, HcG, Crinone +TI cycles= all BFN
    Lap in 2012 to remove large unresolving cyst discovered endo and double lobed ovary.
     6 Gonal-F, Cetrotide, HcG, Crinone IUI cycles= All BFN,
    1st IVF w/ICSI- June '13 Antagonist: Gonal-F, Menopur, Ganirelix, HcG, Estradiol, Crinone= 7 retrieved, 4 mature, 1 unfertilized, 2 abnormally fertilized, 1 normally fertilized.  2DT of only embryo and our miracle BFP.
    Our beloved baby boy was born sleeping Oct. 13, 2013 due to pROM/IC/Uterine infection.
    2nd IVF w/ICSI- Feb. '14 EPP/lupron/antagonist: Estrace, lupron, HGH, Gonal-F, Menopur, HcG, PIO, lovenox, doxy/dex.=21 retrieved, 16 mature, 15 fertilized!!  5dt of 1 blast/ 6 frozen. BFP!  Beta 1 9dp5dt:83.9  Beta 2: 11dp5dt: 145.2  Beta 3  14dp5dt: 497  Please be our sticky rainbow baby!

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    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers


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  • Thanks y'all. I decided to go to lunch yesterday with a good friend, but made the mistake of going to a place with an abundance of cute babies. One of them was barely walking, and so cute, but when she saw a dog and got so excited saying "oggie, oggie", the tears started coming. I'm glad that I'm making some progress, but today is going to be a day completely in my house where I can hide away from the outside world.

    Me 32 (Stage IV Endometriosis, short luteal phase) DH 38

    Married 5/2010

    January 2014- DS born healthy at 35.4 weeks

    February 2014- DS passed away due to complications from adenovirus

    February 2015- Rainbow baby DD born at 36.3 weeks

    My chart: http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/42fd32 

     


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