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Adoption
bumpuser794640
member
birth father drama
bumpuser794640
member
in Adoption
So we received a call from our agency today stating that B's BF contacted them. As far as we knew he was nowhere in the picture prior to now.
Apparently he knew BM was pregnant, but never had contact with her after the birth. Here the stories get mixed - BF claims he recently sought out BM, and when he finally got in touch with her learned of the adoption. BM says she sought him out recently and that was about all the agency and lawyer got out of her.
In any case, the BF yelled at the agency and the lawyer, but they haven't heard from any attorney on his behalf, so we don't know if he will file for a new hearing of the temination of his rights. He didn't register with the putative/birthfather database before birth or before the 31 days after BM terminated her rights, so he would have very little chance of the judge doing anything in his favor, since the agency followed the letter of the law.
BF has until March 24th to file for a re-hearing, so now we just wait and see if he gets representation or not. :-/
We'd appreciate any ts&ps you can send our way.
Apparently he knew BM was pregnant, but never had contact with her after the birth. Here the stories get mixed - BF claims he recently sought out BM, and when he finally got in touch with her learned of the adoption. BM says she sought him out recently and that was about all the agency and lawyer got out of her.
In any case, the BF yelled at the agency and the lawyer, but they haven't heard from any attorney on his behalf, so we don't know if he will file for a new hearing of the temination of his rights. He didn't register with the putative/birthfather database before birth or before the 31 days after BM terminated her rights, so he would have very little chance of the judge doing anything in his favor, since the agency followed the letter of the law.
BF has until March 24th to file for a re-hearing, so now we just wait and see if he gets representation or not. :-/
We'd appreciate any ts&ps you can send our way.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: birth father drama
I will be praying for your family, and that everyone finds peace.
Rainbow Surprise Baby due 05/26/2017
5/10 - Gideon 6/12 Warren
4/11 Started adoption process for 2 siblings through DCF. 10/12 Found out we are licensed! 12/14 Brought 3 week old identical twin girls home from the hospital. Could be at least until Summer 1015 til we know if they are forever ours
TTC # 1 Since October 2010 (Not preventing since 2009)
November 2013: Applied & Accepted by the Agency
January 2014: Home Study, education class, Profiles
February 2014: "Officially Waiting"
~ Hoping to add to our family by adoption via Connecticut DCF. Application submitted on 2/4/14. First home visit on 6/23/14. Started class 11/17/14.~
Prayers headed your way! This same thing happened to us, but the birthfather never did anything legally. He just called our lawyer and made a fuss, then we never heard from him again. Hope everything goes great! Waiting is the worst part!
So far we haven't heard anymore, so we don't think he's going to get representation. BM thinks the same as we do, that he just doesn't want to be shut out of B's life and not know what's going on with him. We are totally fine meeting him and having an ongoing relationship with him if that is what he wants to do, so she said she will try to talk to him and let him know that. I may have DH call the lawyer's office and let them know that as well, in case he contacts them again.
PS, if you want to see some recent pics of Bruce, I made a thread on the Babies on the Brain board: https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12286078/bruce-pics#latest
It sounds like it may work out then. That's great if you're able to have a relationship where Bruce will at least know about his BF.
he is so stinkin' cute. He looks like he has a fun personality
We had similar drama with our LO's BF. He was very upset for the first few days after finding out that BM was going through with the adoption plan, but in the end it he agreed and went ahead with TPR. It sure does cause a LOT of extra stress when you're trying to learn how to parent your LO at the same time. I feel for you!
Best of luck in getting a meeting set up. I think it's great that you are open to having a relationship and getting off to a good start with both BP's in the picture.
1/13 Decided to pursue DIA, 4/13 Home study Approved 9/13 Matched!
10/13 DS home with us! 2/14 TPR completed 5/14 ADOPTION IS FINAL!
3/14 Surprise BFP 11/14 DD is here!