Working on #2, ?s about PP periods and weaning

BootsOrHearts · March 2014

We saw the RE yesterday and although she wants to wait until I'm about 9 months PP to try the frozen embryos to give them the best chance, she cleared us to try on our own in the meantime. She wants me to wean Baby Boots before we try because nursing (and I presume pumping) can cause uterine contractions.

Now I haven't had a PP period yet so presumably I'm not cycling yet. She said sometimes the first one shows up around the 4 month mark, even with BFing. Anyone have experience with this - when did AF show up for you if you were BFing? I do pump ever 3-4 hours, rarely go more than 5 hours without pumping even at night (sadly).

I really don't want to wait too long to try on our own because our frozens are not a sure thing - we put two fresh ones in before Baby Boots came along and it ended in a c/p. And these were the two lower quality ones.

But I don't want to wean too soon either because he LURVS the breastmilk way better than formula and he is doing so well - eating like a sumo wrestler (and looking a bit like one) and meeting all his developmental milestones even based on his ACTUAL age, never mind his adjusted age. So I'd hate to take him off it too soon. I'm 40 so we don't exactly have all the time in the world and weaning would give me more leeway to diet and more time to exercise and get back in shape in preparation for number 2.

So what would you do? Or what DID you do to TTC subsequent babes?

And most importantly, what will I call this next one? How about baby Hearts? ;-)

ProfessorPedals825 · March 2014

I was an EP'er too. I stopped pumping at 7 months, and didn't get my first PP period until 10 months. So if I were you, I wouldn't wait too long to wean since you don't know when that PP period will show up. We're not working on #2 yet, so I don't have any advice there. Good luck!

KikiCohen · March 2014

I EP'd for 6 weeks and got my first PP period about a month after I stopped.

A definite yes to "baby hearts"

If your doctor is okay with you going forward with TTC, I don't see any problem with it.

BootsOrHearts · March 2014

@kikicohen thank you! Yes we're definitely opening the factory for business regardless, because you never know. My OB tried to scare me into getting an IUD saying 'if you go 6 hours one time without pumping, you COULD ovulate!' so what do we have to lose right? And women who breastfeed get pregnant all the time. Yes I'm 40 and yes I'm DOR and all that but I've defied the odds twice already. :-)

katharine25 · March 2014

I'm 6+ months PP EBF and no AF. We've decided not to wean until 18 months at least so I can't really offer much advise there. I think if I were in your boots (ha!) I would wait until 6 months to wean, and slowly wean to complete elimination (or until AF came back) to 9 months. But BF'ing is really important to me, more so than having a second so close together. But I also know your biological timer is much closer to going off than mine, so my advise is kinda useless

Ladiebug710 · March 2014

As PPs have said this is a tough choice. DS was EBF and I still got a PP period at 14 weeks. Well then I didn't get another one for 100 days after that. I did not have "normal" ovulatory cycles until after we stopped BP all together. I had been OK with getting pregnant again at the six month mark, but I just wasn't fertile while BF, even with all the things you get warned about, STTN, eating solid food, etc. None of it was true for me, not even when we were down to twice a day.

Yes I am a huge believer that breast milk is best, but the truth is that age is not kind to ovaries and waiting even six months can make a huge difference in success, so I do think that you need to put all of the guilt aside and look at weaning as a choice you are making for your family.

NoeliaV · March 2014

I cannot say what I would do in your shoes, but here's our history:

Exclusively BF for 6months

First PP AF around 8months

DD has never gone an entire night without feeding in her life

Saw a pretty normal cycle (charting, no temping) on my 3rd or 4th cycle PP

Conceived our loss baby on cycle 5

We plan to continue nursing until at least 24months or DD weans herself, even through pregnancy assuming no complications

My research says that breastfeeding can (and does) cause uterine contractions, but this is *usually* not a concern in early pregnancy because the number of oxytocin receptors in the ute is small. As the ute grows more receptors are added, until late pregnancy when there are the most. That's why, typically, nipple stimulation will not work as a labor inducer until the uterus/baby is ready.

All that said, if there's a history of pre-term labor, I believe the research said that it would be safer to consider weaning.

Good luck to you

BootsOrHearts · March 2014

Thank you ladies! As always, very helpful information. @NoellaV thank you for sharing your research, will bring it up with RE! And I'm very sorry for your loss.

I think the plan that is forming in my mind at this point is to stop pumping at night UNLESS we can re-establish nursing (unlikely) in which case I could feed if he wakes, OR if I wake up sore/engorged otherwise I will let myself sleep. I will get more sleep which is a good thing and if my supply dips a little and he has a little formula, 'tis not the end of the world either, he had a good deal of formula when he was very little and I was trying to up my supply.

At 6 months I will re-evaluate and consider weaning. Again, will depend on if nursing can be re-established, that would make it harder to give up, but honestly I'm ready to go Office Space on this pump at any time.

KJsbabe · March 2014

My first PP AF didn't show until 17 months, and that was only after weaning down to BFing 2x a day. I stepped down the feedings very gradually, and when I had DD down to 3x a day I did notice that my CM returned. I started charting again right away. That first cycle before my first AF it looked like I geared up to O, but then didn't. About 25 days later I geared up to O again, and I'm not positive I actually did that time either. AF arrived 5 days after that. My cycles seem to have returned to normal since that first wonky one.

As the other ladies have said, it's a really hard decision. If time were no issue, I would definitely encourage you to continue to BF until at least 6 months. I understand that not everyone has the luxury of time, though. It sounds like you need to decide how important BFing is to you and if you're willing to give it up so soon in order to get on with TTC. Good luck!

Junebug060609 · March 2014

AF didn't return for me until like 8+ months PP. I was bf'ing and she showed a few weeks after I added a second meal of solids for him to the mix. From the ladies I was PgAL with for DS, there has been a huge range of when AF returned for the nursing moms. Soonest was within a couple months, I was kind of the middle ground, and then there were others that it wasn't until the kid dropped to morning/night nursing or stopped all together.

I was also AMA when AF returned (35 then, am 37 now). I didn't stop nursing to hurry things along....I probably would have if I was 40 with DOR, to be honest with you. Especially knowing what i know now about how much longer it took me to get pg at 36 vs 34.

ellebelle2384 · March 2014

I don't have any advice because it's an extremely personal decision, but AF returned at 6.5 months PP. We started solids at 5.5 months. My OB said most of her patients see AF return between 6-8 months if they are EBF, but I know plenty of women who didn't get AF back until they dropped down to 1-2 sessions a day or stopped completely, but then others who EBF and got it back 2 months PP. Everyone is very different. Wishing you all the best on your next go round TTC!

melly918 · March 2014

AF came back almost two years to the day of my LMP (14-15 months PP) for both kids and I was/am still breast feeding. With #1, I was already weaning due to my goal of getting pg again and I was dropping the daily pumping at work plus DS was STTN so I was only doing an AM and PM feed and gradually cutting down the feeds over a number of months. I was also on the mini pill so when AF returned, my cycles were super wonky so I quit the mini pill. I got pg on the first try four months after BFing ended and stopping the pill but that one ended in a m/c. Started TTCing again about 2 months later. Cycles continued to be very unpredictable (some long, some short) and we conceived DD 7 months after the m/c. I have not weaned with DD the same way I did with DS. She nurses 1-2 times a night, I still pump 1-2x at work and nurse her on demand. I guess it's different this time since we are done TTCing. I don't plan to stop nursing as long as DD wants it plus it's a great way to keep the pounds off (lol). AF just returned last week but it was super light spotting that lasted two days. I am still on the mini pill and am bracing for the crazy cycles. I'm 38. I understand your urgency. I strongly recommend talking with the RE and OB to find out what is best for you. Hope you get your little Baby Heart to join Baby Boots soon!

lotus88 · March 2014

While bfing my first pp af came at 10 months. I think I had one more before conceiving DS 13 months PP. I didn't wean till 16 months, but DD had started the process herself and my supply tanked once I got pg.

bumpuser9524622 · March 2014

Everyone is so different as far as when AF returns. I got AF back when DD was 15 months old. At that point she was down to nursing 3x/day. I did end up getting pregnant twice while BFing, but those both ended in MC (I'm not blaming the BFing as many people have successful pregnancies while BFing and issues were found with my RPL, so I don't want to scare you). Good luck with whatever you choose to do!

Albah · March 2014

After I had DS1, I didn't get my 1st PP period until I completely weaned him at 13 months. 2 weeks later I got my period. We got pregnant with DS2 the next cycle. After having DS2, I BF'd around the clock until about 13 months and then I cut down to twice a day for 3 months. At around 16 months PP I saw some fertility signs and I ended up getting pregnant while BFing and no period! Unfortunately, that pregnancy ended in M/C. I ended up having a luteal phase defect after BFing. Some women may not have any issue getting pregnant while BFing but It can take others a few months for their cycles to regulate. Unfortunately my cycle never regulated but fortunately with a little help from the RE we were able to get pregnant and have our little guy. Best of luck with TTC!

twotexans · March 2014

No advice on working toward a sibling. We are one and done after my issues. I EBF though, and AF showed up just after M turned 5 months. I was really hoping it was a fluke, but it showed its face again 35 days later. I feel robbed!

adoxyinherear · March 2014

I know BFing for the first year was really important to me and has so many benefits, so I'm not sure I would've been willing to wean early. But it sounds like you've got a lot to consider. This feels like such a personal decision; I am sure you'll make the best one for your family.

AF came back for me when DD was about 6 or 7 months old, even though she was still nursing A LOT. It was pretty erratic until this past summer, when she was about a year old and not nursing nearly as much.

4legsRbest · March 2014

Hey Boots - what did you decide to do, if you don't mind me asking?

As an IVFer, here is what we did. We were basically given the same option as you, the ONLY time we were ever able to get pg on our own, it ended in a m/c. Before H was born we had planned on doing another cycle for kiddo #2 anyway, so financially we were preapared for it. I was not ready to wean that early. I had several AFs during this time, but never O'd (never had a temp shift - argh!). I was finally ready to wean him at 11 months (had a major freezer stash) becuase my RE required 2-3 weeks after weaning before starting my cycle. He only does 2 fresh cycles a year,so it was either Jan or May and we chose Jan.

The cycle worked for us and so far so good. It isn't an easy choice, weaning for the chance at another child, but I felt we didn't have the time to waste, never knowing if the first one would work or not. While I would have liked to have BF'd him past a year, I am glad he and his siblings will be less than 21 months apart. In the grand scheme of things, that was more important to me and DH. While Bfing is the best thing that you can do, there are other factors that real have to be taken into consideration (for us it was our age, age between siblings, financial timing, etc.)

GL trying on your own, I hope AF and O both come back sooner rather than later.

I think Baby Hearts is perfect

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