Any working moms who were able to bring their LO's to work?

BeesKnees181 · March 2014

I am a FTM, expecting di/di twin girls and I have the benefit of being able to bring my girls into work with me for the first year. Anyone else bring their LO to work during the first year? What items do you think were necessary (i.e. bouncers, swings, etc.)?

djm31012 · March 2014

i think its feasible before they are mobile. Swings are good in the beginning, not sure when you will be heading back to work but we were out of the swing around 5 mos....after that I would say a pack and play is good with a bunch of toys to keep them entertained.

TheBorg7of9 · March 2014

Personally I think it would be pretty impossible. Even with one good infant I could hardly keep up with doing the dishes everyday. With two, I just don't see how it is possible. Also, you don't yet know what their dispositions will be...

BeesKnees181 · March 2014

I was planning to start easing them into coming into work with me on a part time basis around 11 weeks. Thanks for the suggestions. The Pack and Play is a great idea...I had only got so far as swings. I am sure it will be very difficult to be productive. But I still plan to take my company up on this offer.

jf198400 · March 2014

I am genuinely curious what your job entails and how you think you will be able to get any work done while taking care of not one but two babies? This sounds absolutely impossible to me. I'm not trying to be rude or snarky, but as a mom of 2, I know what taking care of babies entails.

If you decide to attempt this, you will need a lot of gear. Somewhere for them to sleep (I'd use a RNP when they're little and then PNP when they're bigger. A swing, exersaucer, playmat with toys, high chair, changing mat, diaper pail. You'll also need diapers, wipes, bottles, food, extra clothes, bibs. I'd also keep a change of clothes for yourself seeing as how often babies spit up on you.

jlaOK · March 2014

I WFH and can therefore work on days that I have the kids home with me. I only do it on snow days and sick days because I really don't like to do it. With DD I would bring her bouncer in my office (when little) and jumper (when older). You will also need a pnp. Most of my productive work was done when she napped, but since I WFH she is always in another room. I don't know if I could work if she was sleeping in the office with me. Now that she is crawling it is nearly impossible to work unless she's sleeping.

Like others have said, I'd really think about what you are getting into. I do my best working and best momming when the two are separate (and I only had singles). Whenever I try to do both at the same time, each suffers a little.

BeesKnees181 · March 2014

I am not sure how long I will bring them into work with me (I will have to see how it all works out), but hope to make it to at least 6 months.

brachysira · March 2014

I worked from home during months 3-6 months or so with a single baby. She spent a lot of time in the vibrating chair. I was okay answering emails when she was in this state, but in order to do anything more difficult, such as writing instructions or grading, I needed a baby-sitter. Plus, I didn't want to spend too much time with her just awake in the vibrating chair. She needed tummy time, back time, stories, and to change environments and touch and see different things. Not only that, but she wasn't happy just sitting around. There was one period where we had to hold her upright outside about half the day or she would cry.

Some things to plan for...blow outs, spitting up...I did laundry every day in those days and you can't keep using a bouncy chair if it is covered in poop. How will you go to meetings, make copies, or go down the hall to the bathroom? Is it okay to lock them in your office for a minute, or do you need someone to be there?

Will you move your 2 swings home every day, or own 4 swings (high chairs, RNPs, PNPs, etc.). You will definitely be carting laundry home daily. You may not even be able to carry all you need for the day in one trip. Who will watch the babies while you take loads to your car? You'll need a good stroller and large bag.

I don't understand why an office would approve this. If you have to be present for interactions and meetings, then you can't care for the babies. If you don't have to be there, why can't you work from home and hire help part of the day? Will your co-workers be expected to hold the babies when you're on a phone call and they start screaming? Will you be responsible for keeping your LOs quiet if co-workers don't like to hear them? I think it's nice you can bring them, but I would reserve this for days when your regular care plan does not work.

cecilyandgautam · March 2014

One of my coworkers did bring her daughter in from 8 weeks - 16 weeks. She had a pack n play with the attached changing station, an Ergo that baby napped in, a swing, and a nursing cover. Her boss and coworkers understood she wouldn't be operating at full force but she managed to get 3-4 hrs worth of work done each day. Good luck!

*sparky* · March 2014

I just can't imagine a job where you could get anything done while taking care of twins, and I also feel like the babies probably would not enjoy it very much either. I mean, they will have to entertain themselves or be contained most of the day and that just doesn't seem like a great way for a baby to spend their days. If it was very PT or an occasional thing, maybe this would work, but I feel like I would be a frazzled mess if I tried to work a full day while caring for 2 babies at the same time.

As far as what you'll need, I'd say just about everything you would need at home. As a PP suggested, you're better off having a full 2nd set of gear at the office so you're not lugging stuff back and forth - swings, PNP, etc. I'd probably keep a box of diapers and wipes in the office, as well as some sort of diaper containment system so your office doesn't reek by the end of the day, a fridge for all the bottles, change of clothes for both babies, etc.

ebp913 · March 2014

I get that you want to take advantage since your employer is allowing this and in theory it probably sounds okay but this doesn't seem like what is really best for your kids or you. Wouldn't it better for them to be at daycare or with a nanny who would be engaging with them all day, etc instead of you trying to get them to sleep or play by themselves while attempting to get work done? I would really think about if it's whats best for your kids before you go and buy quadruple the baby gear to stock your office and house.

BeesKnees181 · March 2014

Thank you to the women who gave me some feedback on my actual question and did not judge my decision here.

To the rest of you...This is what I am doing regardless of what you judgey rotten bitches think.

laurakaz13 · March 2014

Wow. No way. But I work as an executive in a hospital. I have no idea how anyone could do this.

laurakaz13 · March 2014

BeesKnees181 said:

Thank you to the women who gave me some feedback on my actual question and did not judge my decision here.

To the rest of you...This is what I am doing regardless of what you judgey rotten bitches think.

Not one comment to you was judgmental. Not one. Ok, go away now. We don't need people like you on our board.

jf198400 · March 2014

BeesKnees181 said:
Thank you to the women who gave me some feedback on my actual question and did not judge my decision here.

To the rest of you...This is what I am doing regardless of what you judgey rotten bitches think.

Sorry you can't handle honesty. Good luck dealing with reality.

shannm · March 2014

Whoa.

And sign me up as a judgy bitch because caring for one baby is a full time job. Caring for two surely is. Plus a full time separate day job? Frankly, it doesn't sound like your job is that complicated if they deem it possible for you to juggle two children and your responsibilities. Lucky you.

As for gear - can you bring a nanny?

brachysira · March 2014

I would also just mention that as a preemie mom (which twins are more likely to be), you are worried about things other moms are not. How many people will they be exposed to? You don't want a lot of germ exposure if they're preemies. How do extra appts fit into your schedule? If your twins are like 1 month olds at 3 months, will you still be able to handle it?

Maybride2 · March 2014

Wow. At first I thought you were just naive, but after that little tantrum you're obviously just a stupid twat. Good luck with motherhood, it's going to be a rude awakening.

dashofreality · March 2014

Wow how dare all of you people tell her that this is a horrible idea that won't work at all.

rodiesmum · March 2014

we are allowed to bring our kids ocassionally. Was able to bring her when she was 16 weeks old and until now, from time to time. i agree it could be stressful, but when you have no choice but to bring them over, youll be glad to have that ocassional permission to do so. As for what to bring, i agree with the toys, blankets, and of course the traditional diaper bag. If you have an office of your own why dont you set up a PNP there? just be prepared to turn a blind eye on all the rolling eyeballs.

ksonne · March 2014

I bring my child to work every day (when not on maternity leave), to the daycare at my work.

FemShep · March 2014

amy052006 said:

Wow. No way. But I work as an executive in a hospital. I have no idea how anyone could do this.
Eh, she being a brat, but the person I do know who successfully did this -- twice --- her job is pretty damn demanding. Corporate culture is different everywhere, and family friendly and flexible doesn't necessarily not equal demanding.

I consider myself a family-friendly boss, and I would absolutely be flexible for employees. But as a mom of two, I can say with authority that it would be impossible to care well for one baby (let alone two!) and get more than 25% of your work done. On a one-off basis, for an emergency (babysitter canceled, etc), yes, I could see bringing your child in to work. I've done that and have had employees do so with my blessing. But as a permanent arrangement for the first year, no way. The child isn't getting the interaction they need and the work sure as hell isn't getting done. It's a lose/lose situation.

jlaOK · March 2014

BeesKnees181 said:

Thank you to the women who gave me some feedback on my actual question and did not judge my decision here.

To the rest of you...This is what I am doing regardless of what you judgey rotten bitches think.

Wow. Don't ask for advice and then b*tch when it is given to you. Remember that we are all working moms and therefore know a thing or two about working and being moms.

djm31012 · March 2014

@amy052006 I agree with you but I have found that alot with this board where the question asked is not really answered...people more attack because they have a difference of opinion. In my role, I could never bring my child to work...it would not be allowed. But...if I had a different job where I think I could get 2-3 hours of work done while my baby was there, I would absolutely try it. If it didnt work, then fine...but I would try. Although then maybe I would just ask if i could work from home instead of coming into the office...may even be more productive then.

ebp913 · March 2014

I think that the moms here were just trying to give some honest advice about the feasibility of this situation to a woman who is not a mom yet. Maybe people are jealous but maybe, and most likely, they just know how hard it would be to actually work and take care of kids at the same time. Especially twins.

cecilyandgautam · March 2014

Thank you to the women who gave me some feedback on my actual question and did not judge my decision here.

To the rest of you...This is what I am doing regardless of what you judgey rotten bitches think.

I think I was one of the people who you considered helpful; I definitely tried to be. I know you didn't get the responses you wanted and that's frustrating - when I asked for potty training tips for my toddler, all I got was admonishments that I was starting too young, and that's annoying, since my kid was clearly ready, but internet strangers have no way of knowing that of course. But I see you're new to this board and just thought I'd let you know that people generally try to keep it polite and not cuss each other out over here. We don't sugar coat disagreements of opinion but generally keep it to the topic at hand rather than making it personal. I've seen those kinds of disagreements on the trimester and birth month boards but not here - we're all working moms, we have that in common, but we differ on other things - this is a place for tips on childcare, pumping in the office, venting about work, household workload distribution with your spouse, quick and healthy dinner ideas, etc. There are a couple regulars who get snippy but there's no full out name calling. If you want to stick around, you'll probably find it a useful resource - just take what you find helpful and leave the rest. If you find some one especially annoying or offensive, you can block them so you don't have to see their responses anymore. I've done that on other boards that I generally liked except for 1 or 2 posters.

Maybride2 · March 2014

Uh, no, I am absolutely not jealous of someone trying to work an office job while taking care of an infant. That truly sounds miserable to me, and a really fast way to burn yourself out. When I'm at work I (mostly) focus on my job and getting things done. When I'm at home I focus on my kids. Trying to do both simultaneously is impossible. Unless you have an idiot job, I suppose. But in those first few months I considered myself pretty successful when I got a load of laundry from dirty hamper to clean and folded and put away, and laundry isn't exactly hard.....but everything is harder when you're caring for an infant at the same time.

And I really do consider my employer to be pretty family friendly. But they aren't going to pay me for 8 hours of work when I only accomplished 3. If yours does, let me know when they have a job opening, please!

And even at daycare with a ratio if 1:4, my infant is being interacted with on his schedule. Not being plopped in a bouncy seat until I have a break to play with him.

ebp913 · March 2014

Maybride2 said:

Uh, no, I am absolutely not jealous of someone trying to work an office job while taking care of an infant. That truly sounds miserable to me, and a really fast way to burn yourself out. When I'm at work I (mostly) focus on my job and getting things done. When I'm at home I focus on my kids. Trying to do both simultaneously is impossible. Unless you have an idiot job, I suppose. But in those first few months I considered myself pretty successful when I got a load of laundry from dirty hamper to clean and folded and put away, and laundry isn't exactly hard.....but everything is harder when you're caring for an infant at the same time. And I really do consider my employer to be pretty family friendly. But they aren't going to pay me for 8 hours of work when I only accomplished 3. If yours does, let me know when they have a job opening, please! And even at daycare with a ratio if 1:4, my infant is being interacted with on his schedule. Not being plopped in a bouncy seat until I have a break to play with him.

ALL OF THIS

VOR · March 2014

Good grief. I think people were mainly trying to give you some "real world" advice. People questioning the feasibility of this (based on their own experience) is NOT judging.

What happens if you try this and it's an epic fail? And/or your boss says "um, yeah... twins in the office really isn't working" and you've done nothing to prepare for the possibility that this situation might not work out?

But no- you just want sunshine and puppies and "Oh- just take in a bunch of baby equipment and it will work out GREAT!!!!". Good luck to you, then.

jf198400 · March 2014

VOR said:
Good grief. I think people were mainly trying to give you some "real world" advice. People questioning the feasibility of this (based on their own experience) is NOT judging.

What happens if you try this and it's an epic fail? And/or your boss says "um, yeah... twins in the office really isn't working" and you've done nothing to prepare for the possibility that this situation might not work out?

But no- you just want sunshine and puppies and "Oh- just take in a bunch of baby equipment and it will work out GREAT!!!!". Good luck to you, then.

I remember a poster on this board before who tried taking her baby to work and later her boss decided it wasn't working and she had to figure out childcare. And that was with one baby.

ASmallWonder · March 2014

@beesknees181 You've got a PM

Samiantha101 · March 2014

I stayed home with my daughter her first year. Additionally, I cared for another infant that was a month older than dd. I struggled to do daily tasks like run a vacuum or to make a phone call. I'm very curious as to what you do for work, because from my perspective, this is next to impossible for most.

thedash · March 2014

OK even though you are kind of being a douche nozzle with those GIFs, I'm going to give you my answer to your question without telling you it's a bad idea.

Wait until the twins are here and you're about to go back to work to get the big stuff you would take there. Every baby likes a different gadget in a different way. My oldest loved his swing and could hang out or sleep in it all the time. My youngest spends all her happy hanging out time in a cheap little vibrating bouncy seat. Some babies like their car seats and some want to lay down flat. Wait and see what each twin likes and then I'd suggest hitting up craigslist for a spare one to take to work.

Meery82 · March 2014

OP, you ask for advice and then when you get it (helpful, honest advice, I might add), you blow up and call everyone names and post nasty gifs. GTFO and don't come back.

FemShep · March 2014

OP, think of it this way....

Let's assume you have the very best babies in the world.... (I had one good baby.) Out of an 8-hour "day", they sleep 3 hours. (Mine only slept in half-hour increments.) Let's even assume, best case scenario, that they sleep at the exact same time. And let's assume that they're completely content to be in swings/rockers for hours on end. (I could have DD in the swing for 20 minutes at most.) You'll need to spend some time getting them to sleep. (Say 30 minutes for each nap, 2 naps a day.) Especially in the first few months, they'll need to eat 2-3 times in that three hours, for a half an hour each feeding. You'll be changing diapers. (4 diapers per baby, 5 minutes each including the time to set up all the supplies and the occasional blowout, so there's close to an hour and a half there.) There'll likely be spit up at least once a day in the early months.

So even best case scenario, you're looking at anywhere from 4 hours on for baby care during your 8-hour work day. And that's best case. If you have a baby that has colic, or needs to be held, or hates the swing/bouncy seat, or only sleeps on a walk..... Your schedule just changed dramatically. And keep in mind that while many babies follow a rough schedule, not all of them do. And even babies on a schedule don't go to sleep at exactly 10:15 every morning, so it's very difficult to plan calls or meetings. What happens when your boss or a colleague stops by to ask you a question right as you're changing a poopy diaper, baby 2 has spit up on you and is wailing, and your boobs are leaking? What's your work style like? Can you work well if you're interrupted, unpredictably, and constantly? I know that for me, this type of environment would cause me even more stress.

What happens when the babies are mobile and they refuse to be in a swing or bouncy seat? When they sleep less? When they need more interaction and play? Will you be able to childproof your workspace? Will you be able to supervise both babies and get any work done?

So how would you feel, as your boss, if you knew your employee was only doing 4 hours of work, at best? And that those 4 hours were unpredictable? And that they couldn't reliably be scheduled for meetings or consultations? Would you feel good about paying them full salary? Even if you paid the employee only 50% of their full salary, how would this work arrangement impact the rest of your staff?

OP, in all of your other posts, you seem very reasonable. And I understand that it's tough to hear opinions that you don't like. But no one is pointing this out because they're jealous. We're pointing this out because we've all been there. We know what it's like to have a baby and try to get stuff done (and even under the best of circumstances, it's REALLY hard). And we want to make sure you go into this with your eyes open. Instead of a batshit crazy reaction when nearly everyone points out the problems with your plan, please take a deep breath and consider the advice you've been given.

wychets · March 2014

I could never do it. But I am not against anyone that does as long as you are able to do your job. I actually enjoy coming to work (alone) its my time I have to myself, if I brought DD to work with I would never get a break and would probably go insane lol. GL to you!

Meery82 · March 2014

FemShep said:

OP, think of it this way....

Let's assume you have the very best babies in the world.... (I had one good baby.) Out of an 8-hour "day", they sleep 3 hours. (Mine only slept in half-hour increments.) Let's even assume, best case scenario, that they sleep at the exact same time. And let's assume that they're completely content to be in swings/rockers for hours on end. (I could have DD in the swing for 20 minutes at most.) You'll need to spend some time getting them to sleep. (Say 30 minutes for each nap, 2 naps a day.) Especially in the first few months, they'll need to eat 2-3 times in that three hours, for a half an hour each feeding. You'll be changing diapers. (4 diapers per baby, 5 minutes each including the time to set up all the supplies and the occasional blowout, so there's close to an hour and a half there.) There'll likely be spit up at least once a day in the early months.

So even best case scenario, you're looking at anywhere from 4 hours on for baby care during your 8-hour work day. And that's best case. If you have a baby that has colic, or needs to be held, or hates the swing/bouncy seat, or only sleeps on a walk..... Your schedule just changed dramatically. And keep in mind that while many babies follow a rough schedule, not all of them do. And even babies on a schedule don't go to sleep at exactly 10:15 every morning, so it's very difficult to plan calls or meetings. What happens when your boss or a colleague stops by to ask you a question right as you're changing a poopy diaper, baby 2 has spit up on you and is wailing, and your boobs are leaking? What's your work style like? Can you work well if you're interrupted, unpredictably, and constantly? I know that for me, this type of environment would cause me even more stress.

What happens when the babies are mobile and they refuse to be in a swing or bouncy seat? When they sleep less? When they need more interaction and play? Will you be able to childproof your workspace? Will you be able to supervise both babies and get any work done?

So how would you feel, as your boss, if you knew your employee was only doing 4 hours of work, at best? And that those 4 hours were unpredictable? And that they couldn't reliably be scheduled for meetings or consultations? Would you feel good about paying them full salary? Even if you paid the employee only 50% of their full salary, how would this work arrangement impact the rest of your staff?

OP, in all of your other posts, you seem very reasonable. And I understand that it's tough to hear opinions that you don't like. But no one is pointing this out because they're jealous. We're pointing this out because we've all been there. We know what it's like to have a baby and try to get stuff done (and even under the best of circumstances, it's REALLY hard). And we want to make sure you go into this with your eyes open. Instead of a batshit crazy reaction when nearly everyone points out the problems with your plan, please take a deep breath and consider the advice you've been given.

That was way too nice of you to give such a helpful and thoughtful response to such a nasty jerk.

SoMoNY · March 2014

Not only could I never do this but i could never work with or near someone doing it. How will the OP keep the crying babies from disturbing everyone in the office?

I find it hard to get away to pee and that is with one kid, how would OP manage conference calls, meetings, getting work done, lunch, bathroom breaks....

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